Hope Begins in the Dark

Hope begins in the dark,

the stubborn hope that if you

just show up

and try to do the right thing,

the dawn will come.

Anne Lamott

To be industrious throughout the day, keeps fear at bay.  Oh yes, I relax and play, but all things can be a distraction. 

It is at night, when my mind needs to be a blank slate for dreams to be drawn upon, little creatures dressed in doubt, apprehension and misgiving promenade across my mind with lurid details.  It is at this very time I must quiet my ego, in order for the blanket of silence to stretch out in preparation to gently break the fall of the wisdom descending from the stars.

It is in this quiet darkness just prior to sleep where hope begins to melt into my heart.  Like a magical elixir, hopefulness flows into me bringing calm, faith and trust.

With anticipation, I fall asleep with the promise of dawn.  A new day and a new beginning forthcoming!  I will forego all attempts to do things just right and allow myself to be led by this dawn's early light.

ONLY BREATH by Rumi

Only Breath

Not Christian or Jew or Muslim, not Hindu,

Buddhist, Sufi, or Zen.  Not any religion

or cultural system.  I am not from the East

or the West, not out of the ocean or up

from the ground, not natural or ethereal, not

composed of elements at all.  I do not exist,

am not an entity in this world or the next,

did not descend from Adam and Eve or any

origin story.  My place is place less, a trace

of the traceless.  Neither body or soul.

I belong to the beloved, have seen the two

worlds as one and that one call to and know,

first, last, outer, inner, only that

breath breathing human being.

RUMI

1207 ~ 1273



Dinner With The Jones Family ...

Those people in our lives

who have validated our personhood

by seeing us and exclaiming

so are the foundations

of our self-worth.

Mark Nepo

Fern and Al Jones are celebrating their first pregnancy.  The child will be a boy named Drew.  Al's parents came into town to be a part of the joy anticipating this first born child. 

My daughter and I were invited to dinner as this artistic young couple is like family to us.  Al was eager for us to meet his parents and Fern was eager for us to be present for the evening celebration.  An excellent dinner was laboriously prepared and delicious while the conversations were heartfelt and thought provoking.

Family dynamics are intriguing.  As a therapist, my daughter listens to what is not being said, pays attention to body language, and monitors words that are deliberately or carelessly spoken.  On the other hand, I gather a sense of the spirit within each person.  I tend to see individuals on soul level.  Impressions of woundedness appear and I feel the personal dance between the darkness and the light.

Wishing that others could see life challenge through spiritual eyes; hoping acceptance and compassion can prevail; and witnessing the unmet needs of others makes me want to hold the broken hearts in my hands cradled with loving care.  I want to gently whisper into their souls how beautiful they are and remind them of the wonderful gifts they are bringing into our world, making it a better place. 

To be a positive presence in the lives of our loved ones is imperative.  We do not need the right words or the perfect solutions.  We can be a constant in their lives.  See both the flaw and the gift, extending acceptance and compassion which validates their worthiness.

As I left the sweet home of the Jones Family, my heart overflowed with joy.  I was grateful to be a part of this gathering and to be embraced as a favored elder.  I am forever indebted to both of these intricately sweet human beings for all of the kindness they extend to my daughter as well as to me.  I find truth in the saying, "Friends are the family we meet along the way."

Having Voice

                          

The Universe is composed of subjects to be communed with, not objects to be exploited.  Everything has its own voice. 

Thunder and lightening and stars and planets, flowers, birds, animals, trees - all these have voices, and they constitute a community of existence that is profoundly related.

Thomas Berry

1914 - 2009

We all have a voice and our truth needs to be spoken even when our truth changes from time to time.  We are beings of free will and through choice we experience a variety of lessons to be learned. 

Each and every person we encounter has a message to share with us, and every aspect of discovery can change our course.  When we open ourselves to exploration, and not stay rigid in preconceived ideas, our lives become richer in texture. 

What may appear to have been a mistake may be a life changing experience directing our lives out of illusion and into authenticity.   If we truly believe that the Divine Spirit dwells within us, we need to listen for guidance to help us find our way. 

     We cannot lead others, until we first find our own way.

The Reliable Wife

Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.  ~Charles W. Eliot

Book Club was held on this very dreary day.  Women gathered around a table to discuss the book entitled THE RELIABLE WIFE written by Robert Goolrich.  The leader, a substitute, was organized and prepared.  An interesting discussion followed.

It was amazing to me how 18 women could read the same book and report with such varied impressions.  Some remarked about the structure of the writing while others commented on the style.  All of the characters were analyzed with attention to both the dark and light sides of their personality.  Learning about the personal life of the author offered a new insight into the subject matter. 

This evening I will settle into my chair and cover myself with a favorite old quilt.  A candle will be glowing and a cup of hot chocolate with a dash of peppermint schnapps just might make this scene picture perfect.  I can almost feel my body gently relaxing while the heaviness of the day slides away. 

For hours I will escape into the words of another writer, finding challenge, wisdom, and hope.  I may even give more thought to the interpretation of being a RELIABLE WIFE.   Inspiration will once again accompany me to my bed and be my faithful bedfellow.  

Running Away From Fear

"What is needed, rather than running away or controlling
or suppressing, or any other resistance, is understanding fear;  that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it.  We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it."

Author Unknown



 In early childhood, I learned how to run away from what I feared or experienced while standing perfectly still.  There are many psychological terms for this, but my focus is not on terminology.

As a child, when life became painful, I would emotionally retreat.  I never felt any sense of power or permission to relax into being my self.  In order to make sense out of my world, I would suppress my feelings and rearrange actual circumstances in order to feel safe.

Through years of education, I came to understand the reasons causing such a reaction within me, and I also attracted greater fears of living.  I learned more sophisticated behaviors to disguise my emotional running, rather than embracing methods for healing. 

Finally, in adulthood, I began to observe my fears and placed my energies into releasing negative people, places, and situations to create a place of safety.  Facing unpleasantness, my life skills grew stronger, but I could still hear my feet pounding down the corridors of my mind, preparing for flight. 

The eventual correction, however, was that I remained in the present moment without being prompted to escape.  Instead of running away, I listened, risking fear and pain.  I mentally instructed myself to emotionally 'stand still' allowing all things to pass through me. 

The desire to follow my spiritual path was stronger than my need to stay hidden.  In order to learn and experience the magic of life, I needed to be open and vulnerable to the lessons presented before me.

Life is filled with challenges and personal growth expands through the most difficult times.  When fear prevents our progress, we need to remember it is an emotion and not a fact.  We need to step through fear and not allow it to be a barrier to our personal freedom.

Hope Whispering

When the world says

"Give up,"

Hope whispers

"Try it one more time."

Author Unknown

There must be a line between stupidity and the willingness to try something one more time.  There is an old saying, "Fool me once shame on you.  Fool me twice shame on me."  

Forgiveness comes easily to me, but once trust is broken I am definitely challenged.  Life seems to offer a dance, but I just cannot seem to master the rhythm. 

My meditations and contemplations seem to be unfolding a shift in my awareness.  I am replacing worry with wonder which immediately shifts a heaviness that I have been carrying in my heart.

It seems as though my life has been fear based.   Now I am attempting to daily engage life with an open loving heart and by being simply aware of the changes of others.  Perhaps strength comes from maintaining my own sense of self and just letting others unfold.  The result is hope whispering in my ears.

Step

Every breath we take,

every step we make,

can be filled with

peace, joy, and serenity.

We need only to be awake,

alive in the moment.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Every morning, as our eyes slowly open and bring us back into daily living, we can take our first regulated deep breaths of the day.  Breathe in with anticipation what goodness you may find hidden in the midst of a busy schedule and breathe out anxiety and stress.

There is material everywhere about living in the moment.  This concept can be found in self-help books, meditations, centering prayers, yoga, energy work, and ancient scripts.  It is the process of slowing ourselves down, pulling in our energy from thoughts tied to the past or reigning in the anxieties from our unknown future.   Breathe and enjoy the beauty in the now.  Restore yourself in this very moment and create an awareness of being in the present all day long.  When you feel stressed or overwhelmed, take a moment to breathe which will center you.

Unlike other practices, simple breath work does not require lengthy steps.  In the present moment, you just breathe ... breathe in peace, joy and serenity ... exhale stress and anxiety.  One step.  One moment that will restore your peace of mind.  This moment, it is all you have. 

One Pumpkin

I would rather sit on one pumpkin,

and have it all to myself,

than be crowded

on a velvet cushion.

Henry David Thoreau

The oxymoron that best describes me is 'an extroverted hermit'.  I love people, learning and experiencing with them, but I equally crave time alone. 

Once, I would have described my personal hermit time as a withdrawal into a cave.  What was I thinking ... dark, damp, bats!  My hermit time is now spent in the rich imagination of my mind.  I dwell in beauty and sensations; knowledge and vision; and nurturing and healing. 

The expansion of my spirit within brings light into the darkest corners embracing all parts of myself.  I cherish all that I have become and glory in being just one speck of the entire universe and all that compiles the Holy. 

There will be no velvet cushion for me, as I am content to sit in a pumpkin patch in the midst of nature with all of its forms.  In this connection, I find myself believing all things are possible for both you and me.

Nothing More

When we know love matters

more than anything

and we know that

nothing else really matters,

we move into a state of surrender.

Surrender does not diminish our power;

it enhances it.

Sara Paddison

At least 6 inches of snow awaited my arrival at the Denver, Colorado airport.  The temperature was 26, but it fell to a mere 17 degrees during the night.

For a week, I am settled into the welcoming home of my college roommate Joyce Marie.  She has recently had a bone marrow transplant and has been released to her home, but cannot be alone.  I am one of many of her friends that are participating in weekly shifts to be gratefully in her presence.

Joyce has been my friend, my sister of the heart since meeting just prior to college enrollment.  We could not be any more different from each other, but we are some how tied by heart strings. 

Today is a beautiful fall day.  Joyce's home has pumpkin decor all over it and she anxiously awaits Halloween, one of her favorite days.  I watch anticipation joyfully pass across her beautiful face anticipating trick or treat participants.   I of course will be the official greeter wearing my witches hat.

Joyce is living in the moment.  She remains present and fully involved in what stands before her.  She has surrendered to life cushioned by love.  She marvels at the colored leaves, breathes in breaths that she wasn't sure she would have, and celebrates the gifts of life that remain with her.  Her positive outlook on life and her ability to embrace whatever is coming before her, totally fills my spirit. 

Life can be as simple as we make it or as complicated as we choose.  Today, in the warmth of the sun my heart is filled with love.  All of fall embraces me ... dancing colorful leaves nudged along by a gentle breeze, snow dabbled on top of the distant mountain tops, and pumpkins decorating neighbors porches and front yards.  It is as though Joyce and I are huddled together in a pumpkin patch, pulling in the rays of sunshine, settled on top of mother earth, and just being...without want or expectation.  Nothing more.

Love is all that matters ... then peace and calm follows.

Be A Good One

Whatever you are,

be a good one.

Abraham Lincoln

In the fall, the uniqueness of all things is highly present.  There are not two pumpkins alike nor are there two gourds exactly the same.  Leaves are uniquely beautiful just as the shapes of branches in the trees.

We are all different.  There is no room for competition between us.  You are busy being you and I am endeavoring to be me.  We must offer each other encouragement and compassion.  Let us be joyful in the uniqueness that allows us to be together side by side with loving kindness.

The Timing of the Fall ...

An apple falls from the tree when it is ripe;

there is no way it can continue to stay on the branch. In the same way, there is no way your blessings can be separated from you if you affirm in your gut, "Yes, I accept." 

A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE

Alan Cohen

Divine Spirit continuously offers opportunities, blessings, and gifts, but we are some times so busy creating struggles in life that we miss the outreaching of all that is Holy.  Our ego gets in the way; our agendas do not allow time to just sit in the presence of Spirit; we are not awake to the magic in life that surrounds us.

Life can turn to bliss when we allow the Divine to be our day planner.  When is the last time you welcomed the Divine Spirit into your life?  Extend an invitation and be aware of the glowing reciprocation!

Honor The Change ...

A man never stands as tall

as when he kneels

to help a child.

Knights of Pythagoras

Watching little children, determination and resilience are very prevalent.  They toddle a few steps before they fall down, or they swiftly run until they tumble and fall. Each time they push themselves up and begin again. 

We, as adults, do not seem to bounce back up quite as quickly as children. Our falls can be more intensively challenging.  We get knocked down.  We get up.  We get knocked down again, but we some how find the strength to stand once again.

Children frequently accept the extended hand of an adult to guide and help them carry on, but sometimes refuse it all together responding with, "Me do it!"  Their sense of ego can be huge and strong willed.

In adulthood, we are sometimes too embarrassed to accept a helping hand.  Our ego may prohibit us from seeing the benefits of falling and starting again.  We may have a tendency to hide our 'falls from grace' from those we love and from those who oppose us.

It is during these many falls while we move up and down that our character is formed.  We learn through the many lessons that create a strength to keep moving on. 

The importance, perhaps, is not to focus on the fall or on the climb out of the ashes, but to be mindful of how the experience changed you.  Honor and celebrate that change!

Behind the Wheel ...

I will not allow myself to be

less than

I am

to meet anyone's expectations!

terri st cloud

bonesigharts.com

In dream time, a vehicle represents your 'self'.  It is important to know who is sitting behind the wheel.  If in a dream, you are in your car, but sitting in the back seat, the passenger seat or any other place other than the driver's seat, there is something wrong.  You need to ask your self, "Who is steering my life?" 

I once had a dream that I was in the trunk of my car and I could see my car was filled with people.  I remember shouting to them that I had 'hoped' to get up front one time soon.  Not good at all!

Alan Cohen writes:  "Behind the smiles, charm, and bravado of many famous and admired people, there lies emptiness and pain.  It is only when there is a tragedy such as a suicide, a violent crime, or a painful divorce that their inner life becomes obvious to the world."

If your dreams indicate that your vehicle is sliding across ice, or traveling at high speeds out of control, you are most definitely smiling on the outside and in despair within.  Share this 'double life' with a trusted friend or seek professional help. 

We all deserve to be sitting behind our own steering wheel enjoying beautiful scenery on balanced tires.  It is imperative that we feel safe in our own lives and must strive to bring our inner life into alignment with our outer life. 

You are a spiritual being with unique gifts and talents that contribute to our world.  Do not allow anyone to make you feel small or to minimize the importance of your existence.  Love your self entirely becoming a light for others. 

A Mindful Walk Through Autumn

Journaling the Labyrinth:

A mindful walk through Autumn

On October 15, 2011, a special event was held at Penuel Ridge Retreat Center in Tennessee.  Sarah Cherry, MMQ, Veriditas-Trained Labyrinth Facilitator and Ellen Rust, Certified Poetry Therapist/Writing Group Facilitator conducted a wonderful day of nurturing, through meditations, journaling and enjoying the natural environment.  The beautiful 11-circuit Chatres Labyrinth, a sacred path,  and guided journaling experiences led to inspirational discoveries.


Southern Fesitval of Books

Humanities
Tennessee ... examining narratives, traditions, beliefs and ideas that define us as individuals and as participants in community life ...

 

The Southern Festival of Books held their annual event for the 23rd year.  The gathering was held from October 14-16, 2011, on the Legislative Plaza and Tennessee Capitol Building.  It was a celebration of the written word.

Presented by HUMANITIES TENNESSEE, the Southern Book Festival spread across the War Memorial Plaza, filled with vendors, refreshments, entertainment and gorgeous weather.  Hourly presentations by various authors were offered every day. 

In addition to incredibly informative associations, the Nashville Chapter of Women's National Book Association (Connecting the Book Community since 1955) was present.  Membership and meetings can be explored on the website:  

www.wnbanashville.org/join.html

The Nashville Writers Meetup Group was also present inviting professionals and hobbyists to attend meetings to learn whether you are a beginner or veteran.  Their website is:  www.meetup.com/nashvillewriters

I am very eager to explore the many opportunities that were present to the community at this wonderful grouping of writers.  I so wished my Writers Forum in Illinois would have been able to attend with me to just wander through all of the books, authors and presentations while enjoying the live musicians and various foods!

Books That Go On Living

There are books so alive that you're always afraid that while you weren't reading, the book has gone and changed, has shifted like a river; while you went on living, it went on living too, and like a river moved on and moved away.  No one has stepped twice into the same river.  But did anyone ever step twice into the same book?   Marina Tsvetaeva



There are so many books and authors that I admire, respect, and learn from that it is impossible to mention them all with appropriate credit.  There are two books of fiction, however, that have been my favorite for many years.  One book reflects the journey of female discovery and the other explores the strength found in female friendships.

THE PULL OF THE MOON by Elizabeth Berg was published in 1996.  I have read all of her books as she does a great job of engaging you with her characters.  In this particular book of fiction, she beckons you into a life of a woman turning 50 years old without a particularly enchanted outlook on aging in our culture.  The main character purchases a journal and sets off on an uncharted trip.  Through wandering and journaling, she comes to find her true self.  It is a very easy but heartfelt read.  I haven't read it in years, yet remember it quite fondly as one of my favorites.

THE ELEGANT GATHERING OF WHITE SNOWS by Kris Radish was published in 2002.  It is a wonderful piece of fiction reflecting the depths and rewards of female friendship.  It is a story of 8 women in rural Wisconsin who set off on a journey of the heart. It will always be one of my favorites.

Books can be a great adventure.  Insights can appear through the words of characters that will forever change your life.  Visit your library, find a good read, and settle into your favorite chair.  Getting lost in a book gives your body, mind, and spirit a rest!

Repeatable War

Look at every path closely and deliberately.

Try it as many times as you think necessary.

Then ask yourself, and yourself alone ...

Does this path have a heart?  If it does,

the path is good.  If it doesn't, it is of no use.

Carlos Castaneda

This morning I was reading Mark Nepo's THE BOOK OF AWAKENING and he was discussing Reflex or Response.  It helped the readers explore whether or not we act out from patterns learned to protect ourselves or reply authentically from our heart.  To know the answer, we can monitor what we say and do.  We decidedly pay attention to how we react ... with deep consideration or immediate reaction.  We must create a pause just prior to our verbal and physical reactions to discover the truth of our actions.

"But sooner or later, we all arrive at moments where the very thing that has saved us is killing us, keeping us from truly living.  Being invisible once kept us from being hurt, but now we are vanishing.  Or listening once kept us in relation, but now we are drowning in our unheard cries.  Or avoiding conflict once kept us out of the line of fire, but now we are thirsting for contact that is real."  THE BOOK OF AWAKENING by Mark Nepo

Throughout life we transition in and out of cycles.  This is why life is frequently symbolized with a spiral.  We keep circulating around and around, and up and down, repeating lessons and learning new.  Sometimes the questions remain the same and we find ourselves wondering if we respond with different answers in the midst of changing circles or if we automatically react with thoughtless responses.

In childhood, it is obvious to our parents when our clothes no longer fit physically.  School guidance counselors help us to determine which classes best prepare us mentally for our career path.  Unfortunately, we are on our own in discerning when our protective barriers need to be emotionally adjusted, lowered, or permanently removed.  Friends, seminars, careers, and life experiences open our eyes to change, but only our heart knows the authenticity of our reaction and ability to stand appropriately vulnerable in our world. 

Mark Nepo states:  "We are, each of us, in a repeatable war between defending ourselves from hurts that happened long ago and opening in innocence, again and again, to the unexpected touch of life."

This sounds like such a huge risk for us to take, but if we are not willing to step out from behind our protective wall, we miss wonderful landscapes that could offer the opportunity to enrichen our lives and souls.

Be A Light

Too often we underestimate the power

of a touch, a smile, a kind word,

a listening ear, and honest compliment,

or the smallest act of caring,

all of which have the potential

to turn a life around.

Leo F. Buscaglia

The world keeps getting smaller and smaller.  Our children are taking mission trips to countries we never studied in grade school geography.  Our society is so mobile that by life's end, we may have traveled to many states or countries whereas our parents may have never left their county.   As the world grows smaller, people become more aware of diversity, but also catch glimpses of the human kindness residing in us all.  As we begin to extend a small act of caring to each other, all of our lives are impacted.

If life is full, having creative expression and spiritual connection, harmony and bliss radiates.  If life is not full, lacking in meaning and purpose, unhealthy behaviors prevail.  An individual filled with rage can impact the lives of many.  We each need to be aware of the well being of each other.  Our small act of kindness does make a difference in our communities.

Each one of us needs to be mindful of others.  Perhaps by staying connected to Divine Spirit, we will feel strong enough to keep vigil for those who have lost their way...for those who are in such darkness they cannot see the light.  If we can be a light for ourselves as well as for one other, we lift our community. 

Allowing our selves to feel Spirit throughout our day, we grow less stressful and more open to our true nature.  When we have peace within us, when our self-esteem is uplifted, we can experience our selves just as we were created.  Self-acceptance leads us to acceptance of others.  In turn, others are drawn to our gentle energy and feel safe to be authentic as well.

Let's be an individual flame, and when grouped together with others, we will become a collective glow that can light up the world!

Hearts Get Tangled

Sometimes our hearts get tangled

and our souls

a little off-kilter ...

Sera Christann

Whether emotionally, mentally, physically, or spiritually, balance is vital as we walk through our lives.  There are many ways to maintain harmony, but all of them require commitment and discipline.  In our busy world, it is very easy to stray from the fine line of equilibrium and abruptly find ourselves off-kilter.

Tai Chi or Qi Qong are gentle ways to balance the body, mind and spirit, as well as yoga.  Some find harmony through music or dance while others may use meditation or contemplation.  For me, other than energy work, I like to walk outside to hear the birds and see the trees or settle inside with an inspiring book.  All of these activities can be a form of prayer connecting us with Spirit and producing a sense of balance.

Ultimately, any form of communion with God slows us down and opens our hearts.  We feel drawn in, connected with all of life and our knots are gently untangled.  In these pauses when all of life is balanced, our spirits are rekindled awakening us to all of the beauty in our world.

Complaint Department

"who will take the blame?" she asked.

"nobody," he answered,

"it is too much to carry.

leave it behind and

let the wind take it.

we have places to go."

                                                         BLAME

terri st cloud

Bone Sigh Arts

 When we got in trouble as children, we learned to point the finger at someone else to take the pressure off of ourselves.  If we could successfully blame another person for our own actions, the sense of relief was so great, it temporarily overcame any feelings of guilt.

It doesn't matter how old you are, we are all tempted to blame.  It appears to be the easy way out, but in the long run, it can generate more damage than when it first began.  We have grown so comfortable with blaming others, complaint departments can be found most anywhere.  Perhaps if we complain loud and long enough, we can distract ourselves and others from honest and truthful solutions.

In most conflicts, there are at least two people.  Each person plays a particular part in the disagreement.  One person may be 97% responsible for the discord, but the individual with the 3% responsibility must me held accountable as well. 

If the only person we can truly change is our self, we must look within for resolution.  We must decide what part we play, no matter how great or how small.  We must own our behaviors and learn from the consequences.  Even if we are the 3% participant, we must correct our part in the drama or else we will repeat it again.

What part did I play?

What was my intention?

When did I begin to ignore the default?

Where could I have done things differently?

Complaining serves no purpose, but to drive each other farther a part.  Yes, we each have voice and we must use it, but it is to be used in a healthier, more positive way. 

Shame, blame, complain are all components in a game of deceiving ourselves as well as others.  Forgiveness, compassion, and healing all lead to higher ground.

Concerts in the Courtyard

Sara Sant'Ambrogio

2011 Concerts in the Courtyard

Nashville Public Library Foundation

Sara Sant'Ambrogio is an American cellist best know as a

member of the Eroica Trio.  Her interest in the cello began when she was 6 years old and studied with her father John Sant'Ambrogio, principal cellist with the St. Louis Symphony Orchestra.  She was invited to study at Juilliard at the age of 16 where she won the Juilliard Schumann Concerto competition.  In Moscow, she won the bronze medal at the 1986 International Tchaikovsky Violoncello Competition which began her career.  She won a Grammy Award for Best Chamber Music Performance for Bernstein Arias and Barcarolles on Koch Records. 

On October 11, 2011, I was fortunate to be in attendance
of this Grammy-winning Classical Cellist.  She readily engaged the audience and displayed dramatic passion for her work.  In between musical pieces, she shared interesting stories about the composers that were not the regular run of the mill historical accounts.  Newly married, she now resides in Nashville, TN. 

The Nashville Public Library Foundation is ranked 4th in the United States.  The Concerts in the Courtyard this year included:  The Three Tenors of Take 6 (Vocal, Jazz, Gospel); Annie Sellick and The Hot Club of Nashville (Nashville Gypsy Swing); Maura O'Connell (Irish Vocalist); Serenatta (Romantic Latin Ensemble);  Riders in the Sky (America's Favorite Cowboys);  Bearfoot (Telluride Bluegrass Band Champions);  The WannaBeatles (Beatles Music at its best); Jason D. Williams (High Energy Rockin' Piano Americana Rockabilly); and Sara Sant'Ambrogio (Grammy Winning Classical Cellist.

Music is what feelings sound like. 

~Author Unknown

The People You Need ...

God doesn't give you the  people you want, He gives you the people you NEED,...  

To help you, to  hurt you, to leave you, to love you and to make you into the person you were  meant to be.   

 

This saying was at the conclusion of an e-mail I received this morning from a dear friend in Florida.  It triggered many feelings inside of me.  When I receive such a strong emotional reaction to something, I know I have emotional work that needs to addressed.

Currently, Spirit is generously leading new  people into my life to help me settle into this new transition of mine.  I am learning about southern traditions, sayings, and food choices.  New interests are being brought forward for my consideration and although the newness can be intimidating, I welcome the evolving movement.

Forgiveness for people who hurt me is not difficult.  In hurtful situations, a friend has been a teacher offering me an opportunity to evolve and strengthen my belief system.  I can wrap my mind around the concept of being thankful to someone who has been my teacher, but I struggle with the residue of personal pain remaining in my heart.

Tears escape me as I think of special people who leave.  Relationships are my most valuable experiences and I treasure the unique gifts and talents of each person.  People become pieces of my life puzzle and when they leave, there is a gaping hole where they had once been.  I gently fill each empty space with memories, knowing that in some magical way we will all be together again.

Then I think of people who love me in spite of my changing self.  The friends who stand by me, and remain present in my life no matter where I am.  My family who unconditionally loves and accepts me, helps me to heal the tender wounded places that await healing in my heart.

When all is said and done, I want to face the great Divine with a thankful heart for all of the people who were brought into my life.   I want to be filled with gratitude for all that I have become. 

 

Let Go Of Leaves

A wind has blown the rain away

and blown the sky away

and all of the leaves away,

and the trees stand.

I think, I too, have known

the autumn too long.

e. e. cummings

Fall is my most favorite time of the year for a variety of reasons.  I love apples, pumpkins, cooler weather and all of the beautiful leaves.  I feel most at home in the fall and more alive.  There is a vitality and joy that seems to keep my fears at bay.  My energy seems to be able to stay in the flow where I feel calm and safe.

There are times, however, where the wind is so strong, it takes away some leaves that I am not yet ready to release.  The gust rattles my branches and shakes some of the still attached leaves free.  At this time, I do not yet feel prepared to stand leaf-less or naked in the dull gloom of the forthcoming winter hues. 

It is impossible to maintain a constant presence in the flow of nature or spirituality.  We, as human beings, seem unable to consistently remain in clarity.  One minute we have an experience in lofty space and time, but then we find ourselves disconnected again.  There are lapses in our enlightenment, but determination moves us back through the holy stream with curiosity, love and desire.

As I watch the leaves gracefully fall to the ground, I wonder about the long cold winter of hibernation.  Hopefully my stored thoughts will keep me pondering until the arrival of spring.  I will be anxious to see my new sprouts and what life will once again bring.

All That Surrounds Us

Feminine magic of camouflage

shapeshifting

and

invisibility

SYMBOLISM OF FOX

by Ted Andrews

A few days ago, I was in a friend's car and we were taking a short-cut through a residential neighborhood.  I happened to glance out the passenger window and my eyes discovered a young red fox standing in a driveway. It is my belief that when an animal appears in your life, there is symbolism behind the appearance that can directly apply to your personal life. 

As soon as I returned home, I took out my trusted book resource, ANIMALS SPEAK by Ted Andrews and read the definition and characteristics of the fox. The fox is a totem that speaks of the need to develop or the awakening of camouflage, invisiblity, and shapeshifting.  

In a broader sense, the Fox represents "a new world opening up, that the process of creation is beginning.  It reflects that the world is growing and shapeshifting itself into new patterns that will be beneficial."

This dictionary of animal totems states, "Practicing and using camouflage is something everyone should learn to do.  Working to blend in with surroundings, to come and go unnoticed, moving silently about without revealing your intentions is all part of what a fox teaches."

The information suggests adjusting your frequency and intensity of your energy field so that you harmonize and blend in better with others.  The intention is to hear and see things that you otherwise might not. 

A fox has great ability to move into other dimensions in the outer world ... in water or up trees ...  and embodies feline energies for greater movement and expression.  It indicates "a need to assert the feminine, creative energies."

Credited with acute hearing abilities, the fox reflects a deeper ability to hear a great distances.  Symbolically, this depth of hearing reflects an ability to hear what is not being said or whispered. "This ability is also tied to clairaudience, the ability to hear spirit."  The keen sense of smell determines who or what needs to be sought out. It may be associated with higher forms of discrimination and discernment.

The fox has a love for home and only takes one partner.  The cubs, not having vision or hearing when born reflects to humans who may have had great tests in childhood with the instinctual abilities in the art of survival. 

A fox will go out of its way to avoid potential danger.  It is very patient and uses non-threatening techniques to capture its prey.

So in summary and in application to myself, I have learned to pay attention to the world as it is changing around me.  It would be beneficial for me to adjust my energy and blend more amongst others, observing, listening, and seeing what normally might not come into my awareness.  There might be a need for me to use my creative energies in a more assertive and positive way. 

Human beings, animals, and all of nature has its own language. We can live more fully in our world if we can learn to dialogue with all that surrounds us.