Words Upon the Page

And by the way,

everything in life is writable about

if you have the outgoing guts to do it,

and the imagination to improvise.

The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.

                                           Sylvia Plath

Ever since I was a little girl, I have been writing and reading and then writing some more.  There is very little else I enjoy more than writing, unless of course it is reading.  I have  felt freedom and joy placing pen onto paper and allowing my thoughts to take form and flow.  I don't have to think about what to write, there seems to be something just waiting there.  Waiting to take form in the perfect words and then spring forth in perfect words.

Writing is a way to ease things out of me or to sort through random thoughts clamoring for structure and order.  It is also the means of engaging with you, sharing questions and sought after answers.  Carefully placing my words upon paper is an effort for me to make things right, to help set the world in a better way.  The more we can understand each other, the smaller the world will seem and we hopefully can stay out of harm's way. 

My words are no greater than any others, but they are honest and true.  There means to be no implication that my beliefs are exclusively accurate, for all people need to find their own words and express them in their own way.

Words are colors dancing in my thoughts.  Each word has its own rhythm and tone.  Some may be similar, but each meaning is enitrely its own.  Some words bring images and by joining these images, a mini-theater unfolds in my head. 

This process almost works in reverse in that the slower I go, the more details race in.  It is as though the rehersals have already been run, and in this final act no one wants to be cut from the show.  Carefully, I go, making certain the smallest detail is captured to complete the story you will behold.

Thoughts take form in words that are written upon the page.  It is reliving or recalling or manifesting dreams, desires, or pain.  There seems to be great healing once everything is neatly displayed. Thank you for meeting me here, to witness this page.



Who Knew ...

A lot of it had to do with being a people pleaser,

being the ultimate good girl.

I wanted everyone to like me.

I didn't really have a voice.

Tracey Gold

I stood before you with an open heart like a window opening for you to view, but who knew.  Who knew you only saw a mirror reflecting what you chose to see and declined to see my best.

Who knew you listened to only the kind words spoken and turned a closed ear never to hear the rest.  I struggled so hard to be a loving presence and who knew you ignored my needs and quest.

Who knew playing all of those other parts for all of those other people would finally leave me with nothing but remnants of my beautiful self, waiting to be honored and explored.  Who knew what I would find when all caved in and I toppled inside.

I will write my words and list my needs.  I will speak my truth and let it fall where it may.  I will forgive and forget and begin again.  Who knew this would happen to me.  Who knew.

Having Voice

                          

The Universe is composed of subjects to be communed with, not objects to be exploited.  Everything has its own voice. 

Thunder and lightening and stars and planets, flowers, birds, animals, trees - all these have voices, and they constitute a community of existence that is profoundly related.

Thomas Berry

1914 - 2009

We all have a voice and our truth needs to be spoken even when our truth changes from time to time.  We are beings of free will and through choice we experience a variety of lessons to be learned. 

Each and every person we encounter has a message to share with us, and every aspect of discovery can change our course.  When we open ourselves to exploration, and not stay rigid in preconceived ideas, our lives become richer in texture. 

What may appear to have been a mistake may be a life changing experience directing our lives out of illusion and into authenticity.   If we truly believe that the Divine Spirit dwells within us, we need to listen for guidance to help us find our way. 

     We cannot lead others, until we first find our own way.