Patiently Waiting ...

Here's a scary thought: What if God called you to give beyond your comfort level? Would you be afraid? Would you try to explain it away or dismiss it as impractical? And in the process, would you miss out on a harvest opportunity for which God had explicitly prospered you in the first place?

Andy Stanley
FIELDS OF GOLD



It is seemingly easier to open my inner self to change when I am here in Key West.  It is so familiar to me, and I am lulled by the water, creative energy, and exceptional diversity.    All of my senses are on high alert embracing all that is around me.

It is so freeing to be outside all day, walking.  I feel so comfortable in this place in time.  As this comfort surrounds me, I feel my heart opening and embracing all that has changed and what remains unchanged.  Key West is high energy, motion, and constant change, but there is something about this vibration that allows my creative spirit to stretch and reach for all that keeps me in this flow.

Normally when we travel, I have a tendency to feel out of place or vulnerable to the environment.  Here in Key West, I am not distracted by fears, but rather vigilant for any spontaneous nuance coming my way.  I am prepared for synchronicity to joyfully fill my day.

I seem to have the enthusiasm of a child, as I have no real adult responsibilities to be attended.    Although totally unnoticed, I feel remarkably like I belong.  It is difficult to explain how easy it is to listen to your heart when the standard is removed from your day.  My eyes and ears are open, waiting for Spirit's song.  My heart is patiently waiting as I idly stroll along.

Living Color

Why do two colors, put one next to the other, sing? 

Can one really explain this?  No.  ~Pablo Picasso

Perhaps it is the humming of all of the vibrant colors that makes me feel so happy.  The fresh air certainly contributes to my sense of freedom, but the rich colors place all of my senses in a state of bliss.

Vibrant colors are splashed upon paintings and art work galore.  Tourists resemble a 64 count crayon box moving to and fro.  One cannot help feeling happy with everything a glow!  From awe inspired sun rises to the sinking of the sun, God's creative pallete refreshes the soul within. 

Writing is fluent, words flowing onto pages.  My journal is filling with thoughts from various places.   It is not about who I am or what I am doing here. 

It is just that I am fully present ... in a world of  living  color.

Toes Doing a Happy Dance




I believe in God, but not as one thing, not as an old man in the sky. I believe that what people call God is something in all of us. I believe that what Jesus and Mohammed and Buddha and all the rest said was right. It's just that the translations have gone wrong.  John Lennon


Beautiful weather in Key West!  My toes are doing a happy dance in my sandals.  No hats, no gloves, I am so easily pleased!  Soon we will begin our journey of walking random streets, and absorbing the varying ethnicity surrounding us.  To hear the cadence of unknown languages is music to my ears (the American who is not bilingual).  Seeking out eyes first then noting unique features of the face and body's gait or how the body is being held. 

There is beauty to be found in each and every face.  There is a story to be told from where we have spent our time and space.  I look for the Divine hidden in each passing heart.  My face is open to conversation or a smile gracing some one's face. Chatting with store owners or wait staff there is always wisdom galore.  Brief snapshots into the dreams of people transitioning there from everywhere!

I walk with open palms sensing the energy passing me by.  I make note of the vibrations and the absence of them as well.  Few are those with all frequencies, but I know they exist there.  My face is radiant yet innocently invisible to the passing eye.
Yet there are those blessed times when eye meets eye and a silent exchange is made unnoticed by others passing by.  A nod of the head, a twinkle in the eye, a certain smile, connecting on some unknown level, but knowing we are all part of the Divine.

. 



Clean Slate



 

 

I live in my own little world.

But its ok, they know me here.
Lauren Myracle

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Traveling by airplane is very stressful for me.  I am intimidated by going through screenings based on nothing but irrational fear.  I am always early and relieved to sit by the appropriate gate, hoping flights won't be canceled or delayed.  I never feel quite secure until I am finally strapped in my seat.  I have no fear of flying preferring the speed of take-off to the jolt of landing. 

 

Arriving in Key West, descending the stairs of the airplane, anticipation spreads through my being.  I will go with the flow, follow a loosely structured day, welcoming every spontaneous event.  I will breathe in the warm air, soak up the sunshine, and delight in the diversity I find so endearing in this special place of mine.  I am much the same here, and I just blend in, being the observer of a life so different and carefree.  The creative energy surging through the art galleries, eateries, musicians, and kindred spirits seems to lift my spirits to a level where I can soar.

 

Our living quarters are quite small compared to our Illinois home, but they support the effort to live minimally without clutter and distraction.  I settle my clothes, find a place for my journals and lap top, and wander to the porch ... a perfect hideaway to use my iPad and dream.  In bare feet I walk through thick grass to the small heated pool and let my feet uncoil in the pleasure of the water in this small private garden of a yard.

 

This will be my home, although void of all my personal treasures ... family pictures, books, old journals and collections.  There is nothing but freedom here waiting for me.  No responsibilities or expectations or commitments.  Free to be a different me without associations, labels, or recognition. 

 

This is an opportunity to begin a new beginning.  The slate is clean waiting for the newness of this authentic and  inspirational adventure.  Oh, I can hardly believe I have yet once again returned to my lovely Key West!

A Month's Departure ...



“The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be. Maybe we've lived a thousand lives before this one and in each of them we've found each other. And maybe each time, we've been forced apart for the same reasons. That means that this goodbye is both a goodbye for the past ten thousand years and a prelude to what will come.”

Nicholas Sparks

THE NOTEBOOK

We are departing today for a month's stay in my favorite Old Town in Key West (of course Florida).  Russ and I have traveled to St. Thomas, Hot Air Ballooned in Fairbanks, then an Alaskan cruise, New Orleans, a few monthly trips to Hawaii, and numerous trips to Key West.  Even though my trips to Hawaii have been spiritual journeys, Key West remains my favorite! 

We walk everywhere ... to the harbor, the  port for cruise ships, Bahama Village, most Southern tip of the island, and of course the main drag, Duval Street.  There are museums, art galleries, an outstanding butterfly garden, an aquarium, the Hemingway Home, and an intriguing old cemetery.  There are old cathedrals, a library with beautiful outdoor settings, musical entertainment, and great shopping for unique gifts and funky clothes! We try to avoid the tourist traps and late night drinking at the Hog Breath Saloon or Sloppy Joe's. We will be attending the Waterfront Playhouse, the Red Barn Theater, and a benefit concert by (Noel Paul Stookey) Paul from Peter, Paul and Mary.  The Willie Nelson concert is already sold out! 

Every night at the Sunset Festival there will be mimes, jugglers, the cat man, gymnasts, magicians and various other performers.  Many vendors will be selling anything from popcorn to margaritas.  A variety of artists will be offering their original jewelry, pottery, clothing, paintings, photos, with even a psychic or two.  The list really is endless.

There are so many places to eat, but we have our favorites that typically serve outdoors in garden  areas.  There is Blue Heaven, Pepes, B.O.'s Fish Wagon, Harpoon Harry's, Turtle Kraals, Mangia-Mangia, Michaels, Sarabeth's, Bagatelles, Conch Republic Seafood Company,  Louie's Backyard, Seven Fish, and Abbadonza's, to name just a few. The ferry will take us to an island to dine at Lattitude's or we drive to Stock Island to eat great food at a bar named  Hog Fish.  My favorite Cuban sandwich is a carry out from Five Brothers.

To use one word to describe Key West, it would be diversity.  It is a splendid mix of people from all different paths of life.  It offers history and a culture all of its own.  As you can tell, there is a wide variety of activities to choose from.  I am hoping the open air yoga studio is back  (it wasn't last time) and I have a gift certificate for the Pra Na Spa.  Mid-afternoon we will be relaxing (napping, reading, writing) from our excursions by the edge of our small heated back yard pool.  The little home we have secured offers a wonderful back porch with an over hang and comfy lounges  for day dreaming and planning our next adventure.

And nothing makes a return visit better than friends.  We will once again be visiting with Sandy and Bill who live on the neighboring island key, Sugar Loaf.  They are wonderful co-conspirators and we will explore everything from Key West Home Tours to Big Pine Flea Markets.  We are able to enjoy the 'local' atmosphere and out of way places with their expert guidance.  Besides, they really are fun folks!

My this all sounds overwhelming and yet I know the month will unfold slowly, casually, and mixed with rich opportunities.  It is a very laid back community and we plan on fitting right in.

In the Palm of Our Hand

Where your pleasure is, There is your treasure;

Where your treasure, There is your heart;

Where your heart, There is your happiness.

Saint Augustine

There are times in our life when we just have to accept a job to generate money whether we like the job or not; however, we must not give up our search for what we desire.  There is a saying 'if you do what you love, you will never work a day in your life."   If we have a low tolerance for our job, our attitude will reflect it, and our quality of life is poor ... no matter how much money you are making.   If we are not making as much money as we would like, but doing a job we love our health can be better and our daily existence happier.

If we have passion for our work, we still face challenges and difficult times, but there is something to be said for self-respect and honoring our gifts and talents.  This is especially true if our passion shines through our work impacting others with positive energy.

Sometimes life requires us to participate in employment that will not enable us to access our life's desire, such as:  play in a band, music lessons, art lessons, furthering education or volunteering.  We each deserve (if we really apply ourselves)  to maintain a comfortable life style.  If we do not secure a supportive financial income, our money problems will suck up  our creative juices.

There are times when we have to postpone our passion until our family is raised or our schooling is complete or an advancement arrives.  It is a matter of priorities.  Retirement offers many an opportunity to return to the arts ( woodworking, painting, music), to social issues (volunteering, community projects, mentors), or a simple life (reading, traveling, gardening).  In order to do any of these things, we must work hard to establish some sort of financial stability early on.

We hold our future in the palm of our hand.  We quietly examine what we hold dearly.   There are many roads to travel, but we each must determine which feels like the best fit with the willingness to change and adapt.  If we try and do not succeed, there is plenty of opportunity to begin again.  Don't hesitate to ask for insights and be patient.  Keep an open line to God and really listen for the right connection!

Path of Understanding

If you intend to be of assistance, your eye is not upon the trouble but upon the assistance, and that is quite different. When you are looking for a solution, you are feeling positive emotion— but when you are looking at a problem, you are feeling negative emotion.

--- Abraham

When we were much younger and a challenge would come our way, our disconnect with spirit at the time, allowed us to get stuck in the emotional make up of the challenge.  We would be frozen in time asking why life was so unfair.  We would swaddle ourselves with fear and other overwhelming emotions.  Our energy would flow right out of us. 

Now  that we are better connected with the theory of all being one, our responses to challenge have changed increasingly.  At first impact, we may experience fear, but we realize that fear is an illusion to be walked straight through to accept the wisdom awaiting us.

We immedidately begin to use our positive energy in finding solutions.  Not a quick fix, but a resolve that will serve all concerned.  As we are all one, we know that others have experienced the same challenge or may experience it at another time.  We do not hide or ignore pressing issues which only compounds the problem.  We seek out mentors or those we respect to brainstorm, knowing others who have experienced the challenge, may have a lot to share that will indeed help us resolve challenges in a more timely manner.

There are some challenges unique to our self causing us to be present or be still or go within.  Some solutions can only be found in solitude.  But with a positive attitude, knowing there is a lesson in every one of life's challenges, we can feel validated when we reach the other side, having conquered the situation. 

When we reach out to others, do not add to the negativity already building.  Try to remain positive reminding the person of their personal resources and encourage them in deciphering a plan of action.  The real question is "How can I untangle this problem resulting in the best possible solution advancing me on the path of understanding?"

Paddling As Fast As We Can

   "paddling as fast as we can ..."

A friend of mine had been dealing with several stresses in her life, and I was concerned about her.  We agreed to meet for coffee and as I expected, my dear friend looked exhausted. 

I quietly listened as she shared her challenges with me and my respect for her grew greatly.  She had taken on measures above and beyond what had been called for making only one response, " I am so glad that I am in a position to help!"

I praised her efforts and supported her the best I could, but I also cautioned her about taking care of her self, finding balance so she wouldn't come undone.  She laughed and shared a conversation she had with her husband about how she looked like a duck calmly gliding across the water when in reality her feet were paddling 90 miles per hour.  It was such a great visual, we both found our selves laughing heartily.  Laughter is good for the soul!

This image of a calm gliding duck with bionic feet stayed with me throughout the day.  So many times when crisis hits, we go into some kind of automatic drive, taking charge, surging to the rescue as everyone else sighs in relief that control has been taken.  Unknown to them, under the surface, we are paddling  as fast as we can!  I believe it is referred to as an adrenaline rush.

It is admirable to help others, but not at the risk of our own health.  There is a fine line between helping and enabling.  It is not helpful to be invasive nor is it good to allow others to take advantage.  If we feel used, we need to step back and use our voice.  If we need to restore, we need to invite others to assist in our absence.  We must be able to recognize what is best for our selves, not just the people we help.

I was very impressed to learn that my most thoughtful friend had arrived on the scene, determined what she was willing to do and where she would draw the line.  Her intentions were clear, and she is now tending to her own needs.  I am proud of her!  Her little duck feet are on solid ground in slow motion.  In time her resilience will return! We do not always have the strength to keep healthy boundaries nor recognize our own limitations.

Out of Rigidity and into the Flow

As your faith is strengthened, you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will and that you will flow with them to your great delight and benefit. Emmanuel Teney

Yesterday, I was reading about rigidity.  I am aware there are situations where I become rigid and I use it as a coping skill.  I apparently feel the need to keep tight control when certain situations appear, based on fear from previous experiences. The article pointed out making choices with rigidity can become a slow growing habit.   Perhaps, we begin with food.  We become selective about what we eat, which is a good thing, but then we carry it to an extreme where we can only eat very few selected items.  When eating at a restaurant or in some one's home, our food rigidity can become an obsession driving us to no longer even eat with others.  Meals are a part of socialization and relaxation, but not if we isolate ourselves. The information also mentioned being rigid with friendships.  We can become so selective about terms of relationship we begin to eliminate good people from our lives, ending up living in isolation as no one lives up to our extreme expectations. This resource on rigidity also mentioned how it can spread into all areas of our lives such as clothing.  We can start out being selective, and graduate to rigidity by only wearing a certain brand or color to the point of obsession which can drive friends away or at the very least annoy them. So in these three areas, rigidity can isolate us in very subtle ways.  In order to stretch and grow creatively and in a healthy manner, we must stay in the flow and not isolate.  We need people as much as we need privacy.  We are entitled to choose our food, friends, and clothing, but anything to an extreme can be bad for us.  Rigidity can lead to narrow mindedness, excluding us from many wonderful thoughts, objects, and experiences.   We still have choice when we are in the flow, but we are also open to diversity and change.

Color Your Day

Forget the past

It’s just a dream you keep alive by dreaming
A bubble that wants to hit the ground and burst
But which you keep afloat by thinking.

The past is only a tail
You keep dragging behind you
Collecting dust and dirt
Until it’s so heavy with bitterness and regret
It stops you moving forward.

You don’t have to sit there and watch
While the scenes of your past play back
The tragic-comedy of your life
Simmering with hurt and envy
Shuddering with embarrassment
Stabbing yourself with pangs of regret.

There is no past
There are only memories of events
And every memory is refracted through
A hall of mental mirrors
Until whatever once was true
Dissipates and disappears
Like vapour trails fading in the sky.

So cut the tail, and cut the tale
Turn the mental projector off
Don’t strain your eyes trying to see through the fog
When the panorama of the present stretches
Clear and bright around you.

by Steve Taylor



Every day is a new day or a new opportunity to begin again.  As we shower of a morn, we can visualize washing off all negativity, all heaviness from the past.  We can change our morning routine or navigate a different way to work.  We can create a new communication with those who surround us by setting our attitude and tone to a higher level of interest. 

At lunch we can view our surroundings as though we had new glasses to look through.  Keep looking until we find something we have never noticed before whether it is minimal or magnificent.  Begin the afternoon with a new sense of energy and an eagerness to do your best.

On your way home, recall only the good aspects of the day.  Find a different route home and notice as though it were the first time to view the neighborhood.  Upon arrival home, mix it up.  Maybe turn on some music before we begin our evening habits.  If we are alone, maybe take an early soak in the tub with a nice cup of hot tea or a very red Chablis.  If we have family surrounding us, invite them to assist in dinner preparation and encourage conversation about their day.  Let our thoughts wander through their day and really listen without trying to solve problems.

As we retire into our bed for a long night of sleep, journal or read a favorite poem or do yoga's lazy child's pose to stretch your back and deepen our breath.  While waiting for sleep, think in colors and fantasize what wonderful really looks like.

In the morning, begin again.  Get into the spirit of things and get really creative with changes for another new day.  How many tiny changes can we make each day before we realize we color our day either by dark thoughts from the past or vibrant colors of no limitations!

Is It Really That Simple?

I believe that there is a profound difference between shame and guilt. I believe that guilt is adaptive and helpful - it's holding something we've done or failed to do up against our values and feeling psychological discomfort.

I define shame as the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging - something we've experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection. 

I don't believe shame is helpful or productive. In fact, I think shame is much more likely to be the source of destructive, hurtful behavior than the solution or cure. I think the fear of disconnection can make us dangerous.

Brene Brown Ph.D.

the ordinary courage blog

DARING GREATLY

As a child, like many others, I was shamed by various adults in my life.  I don't believe they were being deliberately mean. Certainly their behaviors were based on what had been role modeled by their parents, organizations and educational system. 

Now, however, we are more aware of what damage verbal abuse, especially shame, can do psychologically.  The emotional damage is not as apparent as a bruised body or broken limb.  The damage is kept inside, repressed for years while gaining complexity all the while a person appears perfectly normal on the outside.  The hot coals from smoldering anger can ignite a firestorm within instants.

We must learn to reframe our language so an individual understands the difference between a bad person and bad behavior.  Is it really that simple?  Yes, in some cases it is that simple.  Reprimand, correct, and acknowledge the wrong doing, but make sure it is about the act and not the  human being.

Imagine for example, if every time a child used poor judgment, they were told they were not loved nor would they ever be loved.  This doesn't help the child to understand misconduct nor encourage  good behavior.  It attacks the very nature of the child, harming the spirit and personal value in life.  The shamed child feels forever doomed and eternally unacceptable.

The experience is exceptionally hurtful when it is triggered by a parent, teacher, leader or peer.  The child believes an adult has greater wisdom and therefore can see all of the child's negative faults from a superior view.  The complexity increases if the child admires or holds in high esteem the adult activating shame.

When we take into consideration the perception of our immediate environment and the world at large is formed well before we are one year old when we are  generally non-verbal,  we are basing our security on the adult attitude (either action or tone). We do not have the intelligence at that level to discern where  emotional turmoil  or stress originates.  We are more than likely to believe that we are the cause as we also believe we are the center of all things.

Living is not for the weak hearted.  Healthy living takes courage and bravery.  Understand the full impact of the weight of our words.  Be personally responsible for everything we say which requires thought and pause.  We have the choice to embrace the human being while disapproving of the behavior.  Teach through kind words and uplifting actions.  We must begin at the beginning!

Journey of Souls

Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.
Eskimo Proverb


There are still no birds outside my kitchen window.  There hasn't been since yesterday's hawk, one of my most favorite birds, ate a little bird under the bush.  I am patiently waiting for their trust in the safety of my yard so they will all return ... except the hawk of course, no matter how special his appearance originally seemed.

For some reason these last several months have been heavily visited by death which always churns emotions for others and my own mortality.  Like the hawk and little bird, I understand there is a natural order to life and reasons for death we cannot possibly fathom; however, facts are of little comfort to raw emotions.

This morning I attempted to make an appointment for a hair cut prior to our month's visit to Key West.  Usually this isn't a problem, but apparently the lovely woman who patiently manages my hair, has just experienced the death of her father.  He was an older man with a wonderful wife and the family seems to be quite close.  My heart goes out to them.

For the life of me, I cannot imagine death as final for our 'essence' or soul or spiritual component.  Watching nature, the physical pushes itself into the living, and eventually the physical dies, but frequently repeats the cycle.  It would seem that our physical bodies would do the same, housing our spirit until the process was over.

If we follow the Christian belief system, we know that there is death, resurrection, and life following death.  The Bible tells us of being rejoined with everyone in Heaven.  Throughout the ages, philosophers, poets, and writers have discussed the theories of death being a passage not the end in itself, and realms of spiritual existence.  Currently, more people believe in some form of an existence after death, and there continues to be documentation about those who have 'crossed over'.

If we are open to the topic of life after death, here are some excellent authors who have maintained their own research and sterling reputation:  Elizabeth Kubler Ross, Brian Weiss, and Raymond Moody.   If we really wanted to broaden our thinking, without exposing our selves to sci/fi horror, Michael Newton, Ph.D. wrote a very interesting book entitled JOURNEY OF SOULS followed by DESTINY OF SOULS.  This first book offers us a delightful vision of what  very well may be true.  Actually, Journey of Souls description of life after death is quite appealing to me!

Consequencs of a Wish Come True

Just because we don't understand doesn't mean that the explanation doesn't exist.

Madeleine L'Engle

This morning I filled the coffee maker and stood by the kitchen window to check on the little birds.  They have taken over a bush outside the window and they are my morning inspiration.  I was surprised to not see even one little bird in the bush.  I was disappointed.  While I waited for the coffee pot to finish, I continued glancing around the yard.  At the foot of the bush was a hawk!

Hawks and I go way back.  They have been my 'totem' for years and I am always excited to see one, and I see them often.  So I immediately sent light to this hawk, welcoming him to the yard and sending him protection for the day.  It was very apparent that he was in a very watchful mood as his body was stock still, but his small head kept rotating, observing all parts of the yard surrounding him.  I patiently watched him as I knew he would not stay much longer and sure enough, he spread his powerful wings taking flight.

Whenever I have seen a hawk, I always receive a message of sorts.  I wondered what I would be learning today.  As I glanced back to the now vacant spot, I thought I saw a feather!  Oh how wonderful if the hawk had left a feather for me!  I would love to have it.  Wrapping my heavy robe around my pajama's, I dashed out the back door.  In my winter slippers, I  carefully tread across the ice on the deck and ventured to the small spot next to the empty bush where I hoped to find a feather.  A feather to treasure!

I stood very still as the moments slid by while my mind grasped what was before my eyes.  Yes, feathers were everywhere, but they had belonged to a little bird and not the hawk.  This was a killing scene, not a treasure trove.  I knew the hawk was long gone, but my sad eyes searched for the birds, big and small, usually gracing the yard.  None were  to be seen.

There are so many issues around death and dying, and grief and loss, as we as humans do not have the full knowledge of life or death.  With animals, we can console ourselves with acceptance of the the natural food chain, but when the loss is human and much more personal, devastation can distort all we hold dear.

So what was the message the hawk presented today?  What we wish for (a hawk to visit my yard) does not always take into consideration the consequences of the wish come true ...



Join Hands ...

 

I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be, but most people are unaware that I am so much more than what they see.   Douglas Pagels

How different our world might be if we projected our true self  instead of wearing a mask or trying to live up to some one elses expectations.  The vast majority of us are not integrated, meaning we have a private self and a public identity.  If we truly loved our selves just as we are with a loving and compassionate heart, we would be strong enough to be available authentically every moment of our day.

Being true to one self is empowering.  The energy that was once used for smoke screens can now be used to extend our true nature more completely.  Instead of being threatened by others, we would be intrigued by differences.  Our imaginations could soar and our joined creativity would be endless.

I was listening to a gentleman being interviewed on television.  He was a very successful engineer in his early 60's.  The question was asked of him, "What do you do  differently that has made you so uniquely inventive?"  Ever smiling, the man replied very much aware of his special ingredient to making things rise above the norm. He claimed ever since he was a younger man, confident in his own gifts and talents, he would always broaden his circle when working on a project.  He would encourage people from other fields to sit in on brainstorming.  He stated that he knew he could accomplish success on his own, but he dreamed of inventions put together by diverse thinkers creating an outstanding result.

What gifts we each are when we develop our unique sense of self and then join with others sharing their authentic selves as well.  When we join hands with our differences we create a community for all.



Be the Voice

                                          



To open ourselves to new possibilities and success in every aspect of our life, we must be willing to change the entrenched ways in which we perceive ourselves and act in the world.  The first step is to change our limited sense of identity.

Deepak Chopra
Seeing Ourselves With New Eyes



This morning, with coffee mug in hand, I was reading Deepak Chopra's newsletter,
Chopra Centered Lifestyles.  I browsed through several interesting articles, but the article about Seeing Ourselves With New Eyes, really hit home.  Dr. Chopra discussed how we are changing every minute of the day just as everything in nature changes.  Physically our body changes ... blood, skeleton, liver, DNA ... just as our emotions are constantly changing.  Unfortunately, our awareness is generally focused on jean size or career advancement or relationship shifts.  We tend to miss our moment to moment changes which offer the opportunity to breathe in and out a more expansive version of our beautiful self. 

Our ego is very invested in keeping everything the same so it can control us much easier.  Ego will go to great lengths to distract us from any nuance of  creative shift.
Simply recall the last time an idea sparked in our brain about doing something differently to nurture our self.  For example, we are driving home and suddenly remember the Barnes & Noble gift card in our purse.  In a flash, we see our selves dashing into the book store, knowing there are sales going on, to grab a piece of pleasure.  Immediately, our ego kicks in, "I better go straight home.  Traffic is going to get bad.  I can go another time.  I should run into the grocery store instead."  Ego sits back and grins.  Our spirit is dampened and repressed.

Now imagine if we told our ego to 'take a hike' and drove straight to the book store.  In a matter of minutes we dash into the store, we find not only one book but two for the price of one, and the check out line has only one person waiting!  With our new treasure trove we joyfully drive home, imagining delving into our discoveries.  We greet our family in much higher spirits feeling refreshed and empowered.  By allowing simple change, our family reaps the benefits, our surroundings support the happy mood, and ultimately we bathe in the residue of self-respect and a sense of honor for our selves.  Ego sulks.

Transformation is an on-going process not a once in a life time 30 minute make over!  We truly need to listen to our selves so we can hear discrepancies as we communicate.  Too many times we are on automatic pilot and respond with statements that are no longer applicable to our belief system.  When what we say is not in alignment with what we feel, we must immediately replace the inaccuracy with current truth.

We have many automatic responses that are no where near the truth in our heart.  We say "yes" when we really mean "no" and perpetuate unpleasant circumstances.  Maybe at one time we enjoyed this particular activity, but we have changed and our reality of change has not yet been edited into the story we tell of ourselves.   The change has not been noted, because we have not taken the time to be aware of who we truly are at any given moment.

An easier visual is thinking of parenting the ego.  The ego is an impetuous child getting its way at all costs and usually making our inner selves miserable.  We must be the adult behind the impulsive child for our own good will.

My mentor tells me:

 "Be the voice behind the voice."

 .



Writers Retreat 2013

Encourage, lift, and strengthen one another.  For the positive energy spread to one will be felt by us all.  For we are connected, one and all.

Deborah Day



The day our writers group decided to plan an all day retreat, I was not in attendance, but I was exhilarated just by the thought!  Imagine, an entire day to be inspired, encouraged, and surrounded by wisdom.  And of course there would be food!

A simple agenda was put together and each of us committed to being responsible for different aspects of our day. Our space was offered to us by the mother of one of the writer's.  What a blessing! We were quarantined in a writer's haven for private roaming, stimulating conversation, and quiet contemplation.  We met our needs ... cinnamon rolls and coffee or tea; homemade squash soup with various root veggies;  grilled muenster  cheese on marbleized pumpernickel bread; spinach salad with avocados, and fresh raspberries; chips and salsa; fruit platter; and brownies to die for!  Yes, our bellies were filled, but our souls over flowed!

Gathered around the table, I breathed in the energy of each present woman.  None of us are the same age, none of us are particularly alike one or the other, none of us do the same thing in life, and yet there is an undeniable bond holding us together.  We each bring something unique to our writers table without competition, criticism or negative intention.  For each other we hold a space where we can be vulnerable, uncertain, expose our inner doubts and share our spiritual gains. 

There were tears to be shed, but each droplet reflected the beauty of a heart so gently squeezed.  Self-disclosure sat in the middle of the table numerous times, supported by acceptance, understanding, and new perspectives.  Random and impromptu writings amazed us all as we listened to the beauty of our blended words.
We held space at the table for those who were not physically present, and their energy was felt by all.

In the last minutes gathered around the writers table, we quietly reflected on our own transformation from the day.  We searched the eyes of each other with gratitude and thanksgiving.  We each felt the tug of the bond binding us together.  Somehow we all acknowledged what we do for ourselves, we do for each other. Our writings, our courage, and our creative  energy is offered for the benefit of one and for all. 

Spiritual Genius

 If you are seeking, seek us with joy

    For we live in the kingdom of joy.

    Do not give your heart to anything else

    But to the love of those who are clear joy,

    Do not stray into the neighborhood of despair.

    For there are hopes: they are real, they exist –

    Do not go in the direction of darkness –

    I tell you: suns exist.

    - Jalal-ud-Din Rumi

Several years ago, I was taking a yoga class from Nancy Long, Yoga Teacher Extraordinare, who introduced her students to numerous poets, one of such was Rumi.  I loved him immediately. 

Jalal-ud-Din Rumi lived to be 66 years old, passing on December 17, 1273.  He was a great Sufi mystic and poet spending his life in Turkey.  Now 700 years later, Rumi is recognized in the West as easily as in the East.  According to Andrew Harvey, "Rumi is being recognized as the unique spiritual genious he is, as someone who is fused at the highest level and with the greatest possible intensity the intellect of a Plato, the vision, passion and soul-force of a Christ or Buddhas, and the extraordinary literary gifts of a Shakespeare."

Rumi's works have been translated by many, but most importantly, perhaps, by Coleman Barks, Robert Bly, and Jonathon Star.  Andrew Harvey writes, "No other poet or philosopher of whom I know has Rumi's almost frightening intimacy of address, and no one I am aware of in any civilization have conveyed the terror, rapture, and wonder of awakening to Divine Love with such fearless and gorgeous courage, such humility and such unflinching clarity."  (Andrew Harvey quoted from THE DAILY OM)

If you are wondering what to do with those Amazon or Barnes & Noble  gift cards,
check out the many works of Rumi.  He makes for a wonderful companion on a long and cold winter night.  He will reach out to you from every page and you will hear him in every word.  He is a presence not to be ignored.

  .  

Silent Forces

Knowing how to call upon the powers of heaven will dramatically change your life.  Imagine that you have a whole crew of angels around you to assist you with whatever request you make of them.  The only criterion is that your requests cannot be hurtful to another.  Angels and other beings of light will only assist and orchestrate on our behalf when we are choosing things of the light.

Carol Tuttle
Remembering Wholeness


Many years ago, I was told by someone that angels are always surrounding us, but are helpless until we request their assistance.  We are born with free will and so angels cannot interfere without our permission.  As an energy worker, I feel the same about sending light to others as I do not want to unknowingly alter their lessons or interrupt karma.  So we can be responsible by requesting angels, light, prayer, etc... by stating it is for their highest good.

In my circle of women, we begin each time by calling in the light (angels, God, Spirit Guides, prayer, love) asking that we may receive guidance, wisdom, and insight for better understanding of our challenges, life, and loved ones.  We also request light for our family, loved ones, co-workers, or any others we may encounter. At the end of the circle, we send light (angels, God, Spirit Guides, prayer, love) out into our surroundings, our community, our state, and across the world.  We especially ask for additional light to be sent to those who are in pain, hunger, homeless, or in the midst of war. 

I see this as being no different from prayer requests or prayer chains or vigils held for a variety of reasons.  The importance of it, is that we take the time to use resources available to everyone of us for the sake of those who are carrying a heavy load. It brings us into action to send assistance to those we cannot personally help ... soldiers in war, abandoned children, ... or simply sending blankets of calm of and peace wherever there is discord.

The point is, we are all capable of doing 'something' in whatever manner feels comfortable, and we do not have to be in church or temple, or in a certain posture to request this kind of assistance for others.  We can make it a part of our daily routine.  Maybe while we are brushing our teeth, or waiting for the coffee pot to stop dripping.  We can use the time deliberately while we climb stairs or wait for a bus.  It can be our first action as we awaken or our last before we fall asleep.

Be a member of the silent forces offering assistance, one by one, for the world's needed change.  Do not underestimate personal spiritual power when coupled with the Divine!

Wish for Thee ...

And so may it be for thee,
And so may if be for me,
And so may it be for all of us.

Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes



Over the years, as women grow into their wisdom, they are able to look back over their lives and see previous struggles as lessons rather than misfortune or other personal recriminations.  They begin to understand the greater purpose or the bigger picture that was not as apparent earlier on.  As a tree's roots grow gnarly securing it into the ground, so does a woman's history. 

Experiences carve out greater space for compassion, tolerance, and pain.  The depth of feelings embolden, create passion, and determination.  The true strength of women is not gauged by physical abilities, but by the use of intelligence combined with intuition, creativity and a spiritual bond with the sacred.

Women, especially those I call sisters of the heart, have taught me so much about my self.  Through kind words, encouragement, and sincere relationships, I have been able to accept my faults as well as my strengths.  They have carried me when I could no longer walk.  They sheltered me until I was strong.  They shared their stories and listened intently to my own.  The memory of their songs will forever lift my spirit and their dances and drumming will keep beat with my heart. 

It is through this feminine energy that I learned to embrace all of nature and to see God in all things.  I find glimpses of holiness in the small song birds, the heavy fragrances of the flowers, and the wind blowing through the ancient trees.  I witness it in  the kind acts of others and the warm embrace of a friend.  I experience the sacred as we honor one and the other and find freedom through respect of diversity.
What I wish for me, I do sincerely wish for thee ...

Master of Me

Stand still.  The tress ahead and bush beside you are not lost.

Albert Einstein

Wandering, in my own surroundings, the end of the year brought completion to the seen and the unseen, and has left me dying to my old self, and struggling to be born again into a passage with spiritual meaning.  Always in the present moment, forgiving and forgetting all of the past, while not venturing into a future, leaves me like a boat without a rudder. 

All of the time investing in meditation, to learn to be still, to be in the moment and here I am unescorted by any specific accomplishment, at least known to me.  Being still is calm, like a deer silently standing in the woods.  It is peaceful, like a great hawk floating with spread wings in a cloudless sky.

Compassion is still mine and my heart remains open.  I feel tender love for those in my life, and yet I am held in this lofty sense of being suspended in air.  I feel lofty with out a care in the world. 

I am comfortable without a charted course, but what if there is no course at all?  Am I simply marking time?  Am I waiting patiently for what has already passed?  Have I fulfilled my spiritual purpose and so now I am done?  Maybe I am a time keeper, simply a bookmark keeping a place in time. 

There is no pressing emotion for me, no crisis for me to resolve, no issues to be untangled, and although not removed, I am left just to be.   And so it is ... Master of me.

The Setting Sun

Today, I choose to cherish myself like a beloved child.  I treat myself gently with compassion.  Practicing alert attention, I find delight in the treasures of the day.  I allow meaningful moments to assume enhanced perspective.  Counting these blessings, I enrich my impoverished heart.    Julia Cameron

These days have been difficult for me.  My body, mind and spirit seem to be laced with apathy.  I can barely find myself in my own thoughts.  It is easy to be in the present moment when there is nothing there. 

My dedication and discipline to my writing has been absent, hopefully for just a short holiday.  Whatever I choose to read, I have read before.  I have no desire to see anyone nor do I wish to go anywhere.  I feel suspended between what was, what is, and what will yet to be.

The crystal blue beauty in the eyes of my younger friend should have inspired me.  Pulled into her heart,  I allowed my light to shine upon her gifts, strengths, and challenges.  Such a beautiful soul she is and yet I was not ignited into realms of reflection.

Listening to another friend's heart breaking, I wanted to be present to instill hope with the promise of good things yet to come.  Her spirit needs to be replenished or she will not help anyone at all.  So much giving on her part, asking for nothing in return.   Miraculously angel feathers float into her view! 

Although I do not yet understand this loftiness I am in, I am at peace.  I feel calm.  There is no anxiety, pain, sorrow or loss.   I patiently wait for the setting sun, signaling another day soon to be done.

Be A Voice, Not A Victim

 

 ... I began to identify and order my emotions, and to develop a sense of inner power that allowed me to move through life not as a victim who constantly reacted to the destructive actions of others, but more as a creative individual who continued moving through life despite the actions of others around me.  I was learning that the power center that motivated my life did not exist outside of me, nor was the power held by anyone around me.  It was inside me, and no one could diminish its potency unless I allowed them to.

 

Machaelle Small Wright

Behaving As If The God In All Life Mattered

 

 

A child is impacted by his or her surroundings whether it is of poverty or wealth.  Likewise, the child is impacted by whether or not he or she is abused, neglected, shamed or encouraged.  The child's behavior will be impacted by whether or not the teacher sets the example of revenge or resilience.  Without any sense of power, the child will surely face an upward battle in life, struggling with trust and safety issues.

 

Once a child gains a sense of self-control, he or she can stop reacting and begin to act.  Once one can clearly see there is choice in all things (not necessarily good choices, but choices), he or she will no longer feel the sting of victim.  Although this is only one step in a long process leading to self-empowerment, it is vital.

 

Instead of reacting out of fear, a person can pause long enough to question what action would be in his or her best interest.  Knowing there is choice, life is no longer happening to a person, but rather the individual is responding to it.  If, however, feelings are allowed to grow numb, the erosion will wear down all sense of self. 

 

Generally speaking, a victim does not see choice nor does he or she use his or her voice.  Start speaking up, even if no one hears you.  You will hear the sound of your voice and it will slowly empower you to speak more and more.  With voice comes self-respect and honor.  Speak your truth using your newly found inner strength.  Be proud of the voice God has given to you!

 

 



A Small Mantra

"You see," he said, "all people are holy.  Whether they recognize it or not is not important.  Whether you recognize it in them, that's very important.  When you see every person as innocent and holy you change yourself and you change the world."

Jessica Maxwell

A ROLL AROUND HEAVEN

Together we can and must change the world.  If we begin with our selves, the change will be gradual yet consistent.  Start small and our ideas will sprout and blossom into changing the design of the surrounding world.  Begin with a small mantra like, "Peace be with you," silently offered as we pass each other by.  Graduate to a meaningful expression extended to those passing by.  Perhaps a smile with a sincere petite greeting, "Good day!"

One day I had an appointment with the social security office.  I of course was early and their appointments were running way late.  I was nervous and anxious and clearly did not want to be sitting in this line of chairs with other irritable people.  With out any other distractions, I decided to send silent messages of peace and calm to anyone near me.  I visualized light spreading further and further into the room of gathered  impatient people.    Finally, my number was called.

Business finished, I practically ran out of the building to be in the fresh air.  When I headed towards the parking lot, I felt pelts of rain splashing on my face.  Amazing!  We had not had rain for weeks.  I turned to the gentleman walking beside me and said, "What is this stuff?" He laughed and replied, "I don't know, but quit hogging it!"

These small acts are just a few examples of how we can initiate change without spending additional time or money.  Although appearing trivial, I do believe that our actions set the tone for those around us.  It is time we start seeing people again as having worth, deserving of honor and respect.  Even if for a brief moment, if we are willing to stand present in the life of an other, our witnessing will initiate good will between us all.

Living Expression

 Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.  Be the living expression of God's kindness:  kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.

Mother Teresa


We are never really certain as to what we can personally do to make our family, community, country and world a safer and kinder place to be.  If we would begin simply, I believe a wave of kindness would ripple across the world.  Begin with what we have ... our very own presence.

Today I watched a video with Susan Surrandon and Ekhart Tolle discussing  acting and the attraction it holds.  Their conversation reflected how movie goers love the absolute attention between the actors, how carefully the characters both physically and mentally listen to each other.  The viewers are mesmerized by the charismatic attraction between the stars.

Human expression is vital to development.  We all crave to be heard, really understood, and identified like we have never been before.  We long to be 'seen'  for our personal goodness and unique contribution to the world.  We have an eagerness to give, but a desire to have it reflected back to us.

Simple kindness extended to those we know and do not know can change the lives of many, costing us nothing but awareness and willingness.  Let whatever we revere as holy to shine in our hearts so brightly, our faces will glow with loving kindness.  Let us turn this expression towards the world every day in hopes of generating a wave of kindness across our world.  Let us live our expression!

Completion Is Mine

There comes a time when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your own heart.  So you'd better learn the sound of it.  Otherwise, you'll never understand what it's saying.

 

~Sara Dessen

 JUST LISTEN

 

 

Since Christmas Day, I have been cloistered, unplanned.  I have had numerous hours for contemplation and wide spaces in time for writing, but my physical weakness curtails my desire.  I have slept more hours than actually awake, and I have had many a journey into the depths of my soul.    When I find myself actually awake, I use the idol time to translate the images, symbols, and teachers who have visited my slumbers. 

 

As I inventory myself, I find bits and pieces missing or out of place.  It is as though certain aspects of myself are not working quite as crisply as they had.  There is no time to loiter over a suspicious loss when magnificent doors have been thrown open into realms of  ancient past, current present, and the forever on going future.

 

There is great comfort in recalling the sound of the last piece of the puzzle sliding into place.  The "ah ha" moment when the entire world falls into peace, calm, love and order.  When all the senses align themselves opening the heart to embrace all that is ... and there is nothing but the presence of Divine Spirit intertwined in us all.

 

All else falls away and I feel transcended, a true light body; and yet I have gone no where.  I remain in the same place, surrounded by all that was there prior, but what is unnecessary turns translucent and shimmers away.  Sweet sounds of music tune my memories into revelations easily understood.  Completion is mine, and I am all I need to be.

 

Synchronicity and Magic

Dear God ...

Help me to let go of

the me that was,

and begin again as a better self ...

Marianne Williamson

There was a time when it was difficult for me to get through an hour let alone a day, a month or a year.  Fear held me frozen in place and if it were not for my children, I would have given up all together.  Thankfully, those days are behind me and I no longer view my self as powerless.

In every minute of any given day, I have the choice to begin again.  I have the power to change plans, ideas, or what I think, say or do.  I just need to be mindful to do one thing at a time rather than taking every thing on at once which ultimately leads to defeat.

When I stay connected to Divine Spirit through contemplation, walking in nature or just by being still, I am guided towards what is best for me.  Through creative visualization, I can imagine what life might look like if I were confident, loving, and spontaneous.  As I adjust my attitude and outlook,  I begin to perceive life as more peaceful and calm. 

Being a better self is not the same as striving for perfection which quite frankly would be exhausting.  Being a better self is doing the very best you can at every given moment.  It is taking a breath before a response or pausing prior to an action. (I can hear you now, "I can't waste all that time!")  This leads us to an important point  ... choice. 

Opportunity presents itself each and every day for us to improve who we are, but we must be expectant and aware.  When we rush through our day, we miss available synchronicity waiting for us.  When we make the deliberate choice to slow down, magic begins to appear.