Courage, Compassion, and Integrity

 "Keep a vigil.

Stay awake in the garden.

Hold to the light.

Revere goodness and integrity and truth."

A WOMAN'S WORTH

Marianne Williamson

Inside my office, I placed three small hearts above the door.  The first was for courage, the second was for compassion, and the third was for integrity.  When a  client sat in my office, they were facing me with their backs to the door.  I was facing them giving me total vision of three inspiring  hearts.  I would frequently encourage individuals to maintain their courage, compassion and integrity.  As I was doing this, I sometimes would ask myself, "Are you listening to what you are saying?  Do you practice what you preach?"

Courage has been steadfast in my life, although there has been times when I have been too weak to use it.  Frequently I acquiesced to the demands of others.  Courage at times was an unmovable boulder, too heavy to carry and too large to walk around.  With insight and healing, I learned to carry a small stone in my pocket as a reminder of my courage being so strong, any barrier would appear to certainly be a small rock.

It has always been easy for me to have compassion and it seems to be extended to all things.  Once several years ago, I came out of my down town office to find all the the lovely trees in the courtyard had been sawed off at the base and removed to allow workers to replace sidewalks.  I was overcome with grief and sorrow for the beautiful trees that had been seemingly slaughtered.  I felt as though I were looking at a battlefield. I hold the image still.

My definition of integrity is who you are when no one is watching. Although I did not have this definition as a child, I held the sense of the word within me, helping me to get through challenging times.  When I was falsely accused or it was assumed I had committed some dastardly childish act, I would quietly hold on to the emotions inside, reminding me I was good and God knew the truth. 

So I have learned to stay awake in the garden, nodding off just here and there, but I hold on to my light, to keep it shinning brightly both for myself and for others.  I cherish goodness and honesty in the hearts of others as I carry compassion and courage with a willingness to share.  It is integrity, however,  guiding my internal spirit in all things seen and unseen.

The Traveler

The spiritual path ~ is simply the journey of living our lives.

Everyone is on a spiritual path,

most people just don't know it.

Marianne Williamson

If the spiritual path were in one straight line where the traveler could have clear vision, and confidence on the path, the journey would be so much easier.  This is not the way, however.  The spiritual path bends and curves, has barriers to be overcome, detours available for free choice, stretches through rain, fog, sleet, snow, and very high winds.  Some days the sun is shining while other days darkness covers the path.  It is not easy nor was it meant to be.  The spiritual path requires patience, awareness, determination, courage and guidance from various sources.  The goal is to find all parts of the self and to become one with all there is.  All paths lead to Divine Spirit.

Although each spiritual path differs, the traveler meets a variety of teachers along the way, learning important lessons.  Some teachers stay with us for awhile and yet others seem coincidental just in passing.  Most of the journey is spent alone, discovering the traveler's purpose, strengths, gifts and talents.

Another portion of the spiritual path is designated for the traveler to not only be a student of life, but also at times the teacher.  As the teacher, experienced wisdom can be passed along to others upon the path.  It is an opportunity for the traveler to be in service to fellow travelers.

When the traveler wanders off the path, connections can be made with exceptional people who do not appear to be traveling at all.  These non-travelers do not appear to be following any sort of path and yet they are spiritually inspiring almost unknowingly.  They may not even refer to themselves as even being spiritual, but we find them to be respectful and honorable.

The spiritual path is a journey of a life time.  It is not meant to be a super speed way, as it is mostly a solitude road.  At times a section of the path may seem familiar as though it has been previously traveled, but the boulder once struggled with is now only a rock.  Tools are gathered along the way in hopes the traveler can move through troublesome areas more gracefully.  At times, it is easy to forget about the tools, and the traveler mounts the boulder again.

A traveler may also be a seeker or one who wanders.  Just because the traveler may wander, it does not mean the traveler is lost.  There are various foot paths available and although these less tread paths are not direct routes, they frequently provide needed rest or solitude or greater challenge. 

We are all travelers in one way or another and all paths lead to the Divine. 

Subtle Change

“It takes courage...to endure the sharp pains of self discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.”

Marianne Williamson, Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"



In the month of December of 2012 I prepared for the ending of another year.  Parts of my self began to shift and  although observant, I was not feeling as though I knew where this slide was taking me.  The swift journey down the slope dumped me into January of 2013 with subtle changes short of my grasp. 

I had been sick for two weeks, cleansing body, mind and soul, leaving me exhausted and apprehensive of what was waiting in store.  As my mind had been de-cluttered, I was aware of open space waiting for a new level of understanding or reviews of past challenges.  Nothing appeared.  It felt as though I were wearing a cap of nothingness upon my head with no purpose at all.

I am a person who collects and gathers.  I don't get everything in one lump sum, I add a little bit at a time.  Even so, the emptiness in my mind unnerves me.    It is as though I have become barren without sadness, choice or comprehension.  What is this to mean?

Growing more and more private, I pry my heart open ready to receive what is yet to come.  I remain still, anticipating subtle changes.  Love, energy, and light continue to be my domain even though nothing else seems to remain the same.

Synchronicity and Magic

Dear God ...

Help me to let go of

the me that was,

and begin again as a better self ...

Marianne Williamson

There was a time when it was difficult for me to get through an hour let alone a day, a month or a year.  Fear held me frozen in place and if it were not for my children, I would have given up all together.  Thankfully, those days are behind me and I no longer view my self as powerless.

In every minute of any given day, I have the choice to begin again.  I have the power to change plans, ideas, or what I think, say or do.  I just need to be mindful to do one thing at a time rather than taking every thing on at once which ultimately leads to defeat.

When I stay connected to Divine Spirit through contemplation, walking in nature or just by being still, I am guided towards what is best for me.  Through creative visualization, I can imagine what life might look like if I were confident, loving, and spontaneous.  As I adjust my attitude and outlook,  I begin to perceive life as more peaceful and calm. 

Being a better self is not the same as striving for perfection which quite frankly would be exhausting.  Being a better self is doing the very best you can at every given moment.  It is taking a breath before a response or pausing prior to an action. (I can hear you now, "I can't waste all that time!")  This leads us to an important point  ... choice. 

Opportunity presents itself each and every day for us to improve who we are, but we must be expectant and aware.  When we rush through our day, we miss available synchronicity waiting for us.  When we make the deliberate choice to slow down, magic begins to appear. 

Solitude or Isolation

Each of us carries the tendency to separate ourselves from others.  There is such a thing as splendid solitude, but isolation is not it.   ~ Marianne Williamson 


For several months now, I have withdrawn into my life.  I have taken a sabbatical from old routines and discovered freedom to unfold in my own time.  I explore inner landscapes that have been ignored for decades and in dire need for excavation.  My journal is filling with words from my silence, articulating truths for so long not told.  I am deciphering my dreams with greater intensity to help break out of my too narrow vision.

For me, all of these actions are healthy and necessary for my personal and spiritual growth, but I now discover that I have eliminated too many resources.  For me, the weather has been too extremely hot, so my daily walks have been postponed indefinitely.  I have missed the inspiration provided by nature and its flock.  My writers group will not begin again for a few more weeks, so my dedication to writing has fallen more to my self-discipline rather than fresh ideas triggered by our weekly meetings.  I have chosen far more fiction books than I normally read, so I have lost the balance I usually keep with non-fiction.

So except for my women's circle, I have taken very little time to nurture friendships, both old and new.  I have kept up with a few friends grabbing coffee from time to time, but not at all like I used to do.  So has my intention for solitude led me to isolation?  I think this may be true.

The trouble with isolation is that we are so far removed from the actual scene, our perceptions are easily distorted.  Not hearing the voices of others we love and respect, our ego gladly steps forward to put its convoluted spin on things.  These negative shifts in perception pave the way to greater isolation.

We need to discover the balance between time spent with our loved ones and time spent with loving our selves.  Our body needs hugs and kindness from others just as much as we need time for contemplation or reflection or prayer. 

If not careful, time with friends or career can turn into a 24 hour rat race.  If not careful, solitude can turn into isolation.

Answering the Call

Something amazing happens when we surrender and just love.

We melt into another world, a realm of power already within us.

The world changes when we change, the world softens when we soften.  The world loves us when we choose to love the world.

~Marianne Williamson

In my mind, the word surrender has always been too closely related to the word submission.  I am realizing, however, the belief of submission where I had to give all of my power away was a costly self-destructive action.

By trying to broaden my understanding of the word surrender I realize that it is simply giving in to the unfolding of life.  In surrendering to life or to the Divine we are not called to become powerless, but called to allow life or the Divine to lead us towards fulfillment or total connection.

By being mindful, I desire to overcome my resistance and to say 'yes' to the moment.   I want to go with the flow of life and not against it.  It is time to answer the call.

Imperfections and Flaws

Please heal my wounded places

and free my heart to love.

Marianne Williamson

Our lives move in cycles.  What lessons we think we have learned seem to appear once again, disguised just a little differently.  When we think we have mastered the lesson, life seems to run it by us just one more time to make sure we really did get it!

Our lives travel in spirals.  We may meet different people or live in random locations, but our life experiences seem to repeat themselves.  No matter where we go, there we are.

It takes so long to recognize our 'wounds' and then even longer to cognitize how they are impacting our behaviors.  Then corrective measures are taken to replace inappropriate thinking or actions with positive affirmations and constructive movement.  We must be willing to allow healing to occur, but even when willing, it takes time.

Forgiveness speeds our healing and is a necessary part of the process.  Forgiving our selves is perhaps the hardest task of all, even when we were the victim. 

Climbing out of the darkness becomes easier once we put down our baggage.  It is important for us to clear out the old before the new can be entered.  Even when we do this to our satisfaction, we take another turn on the spiral and find our selves shedding yet another layer of 'stuff'.  The good news is each layer becomes easier to shed.

In learning to love our selves, imperfections and flaws, we are better prepared to love one and other.  We must not be afraid of the dark.  Let us shine our lights for each other, helping everyone to find the way!



Masculine and Feminine

There is a collective force rising up
on the earth today,
an energy of the reborn feminine ...
This is a time of monumental shift,
from the male dominance of human consciousness
back to a balanced relationship
between masculine and feminine.

Marianne Williamson




Eastern culture teaches us there is a masculine and feminine side to each living person. Masculine elements associated with the right side of the body could be described as assertive, powerful, cerebral, giving, determined ... qualities relating to the career or approach to business in your life. Our feminine side associated with the left side of the body could be described as gentle, creative, receiving, emotional, intuitive, embracing ... qualities relating to relationships in our lives. So each of us has
a masculine and feminine side no matter what gender we happen to be.

Ideally, we balance both parts, masculine and feminine within ourselves. As a woman, there are times when we need to be aggressive and driven, just as there are times we need to be gentle and creative. As a man, there are times when we need to be tender and loving, just as there are times to be strong willed. Whether we are a man or a woman, it is beneficial to be able to swiftly move between both sides and to not be stuck just in one side. 

If we are a survivor, perhaps we had to stay very masculine and hide our feminine side. A man may not feel safe expressing his emotions when he is fighting for his family's livelihood. A single mom may have to stay very masculine to compete in her field of business. But if we stay stuck in a masculine adrenaline push, a toll is taken on our body. We strip our gears or simply burn out. We must initiate balance, allowing for the body to release stress and rekindle the spirit.

If we become stuck on the feminine side, we do not have good boundaries to protect our selves or even our families. We can be overcome by emotion or depression that keeps us small. It is then we need to use our masculine side to reach out for resources, avoiding the role of victim.

The same holds true not only personally, but in relationship between men and women. As our culture evolves embracing diversity and offering balance or equality to gender, ethnicity, and diversity, we more fully grow into our full self. It is okay for a man to express or demonstrate appropriate emotion, just as it is acceptable for a woman to be driven by her career. If we all respect each other and honor each others decisions or choices, the climate of our culture becomes far more supportive and nurturing.

Ultimately, the male and female needs to be in harmony not only within the body but within the culture as well. By honoring each other and by respecting the spirit of an individual, our spirit soars.

 

Begin a New Day

We embark upon the creation of a peaceful lifestyle by recognizing the need, daily, to cleanse our minds just as we cleanse our bodies. Through morning prayers and meditation, we embark upon the day spiritually prepared.  Without this preparation, we enter the day with yesterday's anxieties  ~  our own and those of millions of others.  

---Marianne Williamson

Each day is a gift, an opportunity to begin anew, and a creation of personal experience.  Our attitude sets the tone for our inner rhythms and for the cadence of those around us.  

We organize household duties, designate responsibilities to others, and keep a running master list of all we have to do.  Even with the very best organizational skills, we frequently omit a beginning ritual.  

Every morning as we open our eyes, we can figuratively open our hearts to another day of compassion and encouragement  for ourselves and others.  We can repeat affirmations or words of thanksgiving for all that we have.  With a grateful heart, we then can begin a new day.

Balance must be consciously planned or time for nurturing and nourishing slips away.  The material world for whatever reason takes precedence over our spiritual awareness and our stress, anxiety, and worries multiply.  

Celebrate the gift of life every morning allowing a sense of excitement for the unfolding of the day.  Embrace the day with wholeness (the blending of spiritual with material) and expect wonderful things!