Decision Making

Whenever an answer, a solution or a creative idea is needed,

stop thinking for a moment

by focusing your attention on your inner energy field.

Become aware of the stillness.

Eckhart Tolle

Oneness With All Life 

Whenever we face a challenge, our brains usually kick in searching for resolve.  We may grow anxious during our search which immediately interferes with cognition.  We can then mix and match a few things together forming a band aid for the problem or we resource the entire problem out for someone else to solve.  

The best reaction to a challenge, is to not react at all, but to simply sit with it for a while in silence.  We hold fear and anxiety at bay as we quietly listen to wisdom or nudges we receive from within.  If a resolution does not immediately appear, then choose not to come to a decision for awhile.  Carry on with other tasks until there is time to just pause in silence once again, listening for insight.  Keep drama and unnecessary emotion at bay, while we blend our thinking with our heart to determine the best action for all involved.

Realizing some decisions need to be made immediately, there are others that can benefit from lingering thoughts.  Years ago, a friend mentioned to me that it took Jesus the Christ three days to rise from the dead.  The friend told me to give any problem three days to work itself out.  I felt this was worth trying, and I have used it numerous times throughout my life challenges.

A solution created today, may not be as good as the one made after some time has passed.  We can avoid being impulsive or  repressing our emotions as they are somewhat sitting on a back burner.  If we maintain the attitude of searching for the best calculation and not feel pressured into quick decision, we find ourselves in a very different space, thinking more clearly, after a few days have passed.  I have repeatedly found the decisions I have made after three days have been much better long term remedies for all concerned than the quick fix of three days ago.

So next time we are contemplating an appropriate answer to a problem, simply pause.  Sit with the situation in silence.  Be open to the creative options as they begin to surface. Be still allowing our energy to flow until we feel in balance with our decision.

Answering the Call

Something amazing happens when we surrender and just love.

We melt into another world, a realm of power already within us.

The world changes when we change, the world softens when we soften.  The world loves us when we choose to love the world.

~Marianne Williamson

In my mind, the word surrender has always been too closely related to the word submission.  I am realizing, however, the belief of submission where I had to give all of my power away was a costly self-destructive action.

By trying to broaden my understanding of the word surrender I realize that it is simply giving in to the unfolding of life.  In surrendering to life or to the Divine we are not called to become powerless, but called to allow life or the Divine to lead us towards fulfillment or total connection.

By being mindful, I desire to overcome my resistance and to say 'yes' to the moment.   I want to go with the flow of life and not against it.  It is time to answer the call.

At A Snail's Pace

It is in our idleness, in our dreams, that the submerged truth sometimes comes to the top.  ~ Virginia Woolf


Today, I seem to be moving at a snail's pace.  I have a list of chores I want to accomplish and I have been carrying it around for days with not one task eliminated.  Perhaps I need to just embrace this slow state and use it for meditation or contemplation or prayer or sending love, energy, and light to those I know who are in need.  This lazy time might then be turned into a productive time worthy of my day.

Sitting in stillness, I am surprised what rattles through my consciousness.  I settle deeper within and my mindless chatter disappears.  Being mindful, paying attention to what gentle thoughts float into my quiet mind, I sink into the calm.  My body relaxes and I am at peace.

Throughout my day, my pace remains slow, but it gives me time to let my insights unfold.  If I were racing around completing my chores, I would not be experiencing this wonderful state of just being in the present moment.  By late afternoon I am longing to sit with my journal, to further explore what came to mind earlier in the day.  I feel my creative juices longing to flow. 

I think I shall spend more days at a snail's pace.  The experience has brought the gifts of living into awareness and an enhanced appreciation for all that I have. 

All is good in my world.

Loving in the Moment

To Cherish Your Beloved

When we know that the person we love is impermanent, we will cherish our beloved all the more.  Impermanence teaches us to respect and value every moment and all the precious things around us and inside of us.  When we practice mindfulness of impermanence, we become fresher and more loving.

Thich Nhat Hanh
YOUR TRUE HOME


It is not easy to love all of the time, especially those who are closest to us.  Somehow it is easier to find fault with the ones we love the most, and that is just not right.

When I am with my grandchildren, I find myself to be far more lenient than when I was raising my own kids.  While visiting, I find myself fully present in the moment.  I listen carefully to what they say, try to respond with good comments, and really try to reflect the love I feel for them.

Unfortunately, in many of our most important relationships, we drop the ball.  We seem to develop the attitude that 'they' will understand ... over and over again.  We perhaps say unfiltered things to them that we would never dare say to a stranger or close friend.  This makes no sense to me, and yet it is sadly true. 

There are many old sayings:  "Don't cry over spilt milk!  Don't go to bed angry!  Don't let these be the last words you speak."  Far too many times I have heard people crying over the death of a loved one while saying, "The last words I said to him were awful and I never kissed him good-bye!"

The point is not to tolerate misbehavior nor withhold disappointment, but to use appropriate words for a loved one.  We can make our point just as easily using a calm and loving voice rather than shouting with anger.  Even when we have unfinished business, we can still temper it with love.  Instead of a cold shoulder, we could be mindful of how much we do love this individual, and give them a hug saying, "I really need to think this over."    This keeps the door to communication open and we are not adding to the already long list of complaints.

Thich Nhat Hanh suggests by staying in the moment, remembering that we are all impermanent, we will cherish our loved ones more.  So it becomes important to treat each other with loving respect, letting the minor offenses fall, as we keep our hearts and minds open.  It becomes most important that our loved ones are continuously told how much they are loved.

"Oh, they know how much I love them," is what many folks say, but people want to hear the loving words and not assume.
In remembering impermanence, we learn to reframe what we say:  "I love you dearly, but I do not like your behavior.  I cannot imagine my life without you, but I cannot agree to these decisions."  So there is a balance to what we say, and it is said calmly with love.  It is honest communication that aligns us.

In each present moment, I will try to be mindful of my own impermanence.  I will endeavor to cherish the good in every one and all things hopefully becoming fresher and more loving.