Words Upon the Page

And by the way,

everything in life is writable about

if you have the outgoing guts to do it,

and the imagination to improvise.

The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.

                                           Sylvia Plath

Ever since I was a little girl, I have been writing and reading and then writing some more.  There is very little else I enjoy more than writing, unless of course it is reading.  I have  felt freedom and joy placing pen onto paper and allowing my thoughts to take form and flow.  I don't have to think about what to write, there seems to be something just waiting there.  Waiting to take form in the perfect words and then spring forth in perfect words.

Writing is a way to ease things out of me or to sort through random thoughts clamoring for structure and order.  It is also the means of engaging with you, sharing questions and sought after answers.  Carefully placing my words upon paper is an effort for me to make things right, to help set the world in a better way.  The more we can understand each other, the smaller the world will seem and we hopefully can stay out of harm's way. 

My words are no greater than any others, but they are honest and true.  There means to be no implication that my beliefs are exclusively accurate, for all people need to find their own words and express them in their own way.

Words are colors dancing in my thoughts.  Each word has its own rhythm and tone.  Some may be similar, but each meaning is enitrely its own.  Some words bring images and by joining these images, a mini-theater unfolds in my head. 

This process almost works in reverse in that the slower I go, the more details race in.  It is as though the rehersals have already been run, and in this final act no one wants to be cut from the show.  Carefully, I go, making certain the smallest detail is captured to complete the story you will behold.

Thoughts take form in words that are written upon the page.  It is reliving or recalling or manifesting dreams, desires, or pain.  There seems to be great healing once everything is neatly displayed. Thank you for meeting me here, to witness this page.



Unfolding Parts of the Self

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”       

~Anais Nin




Change has never been one of my mastered areas as I lean more towards permanency.  I feel more comfortable  when things are the way I expect them to be; but then there suddenly seems to be a time when I want to rearrange everything as I have grown bored or feel stagnant.

Change is a constant in life, challenging us whenever we feel settled about an issue, situation, or location.  Change can shift our emotions and how we feel within seconds even though we may not be aware of the cause and effect until a much later time.

We are multi-faceted human beings.  We are not just one solid body of thought, word, or deed. We are made up of differing parts.  Our cause and effect, or ability to respond, or inconsistencies can vary from moment to moment or conversely may not shift for years.

We may be a professional flying to different cities daily, sleeping in different hotels every night and eating meals at random.  We may love this style of life, but when we return to our home, if one thing is out of place, we may go ballistic!  We may stay up late into the night arguing to win our partner over to our side.  Then first thing in the morning, our partner openly agrees, but we sometimes respond with, "No, I have changed my mind."

Not only are our parts vastly different from each other, they are also given to change.  We are similar to massive computers with files being added to regularly or transferred or deleted and then retrieved from the recycle bin!  We need to know ourselves well so we can recognize when we are on the cusp of real change or a fanciful whim. 

It is beneficial to listen to all parts of the self, as each part needs some level of honor and respect.  In other words, we need to create balance between all of our varying needs.  If we pay attention, we will recognize which part of our self is trying to get attention and to what degree we want to give it.

Sometimes our behavior may surprise us.  We may ask, "Where did that come from?"  We all are exposed to negative energy, and we are all confronted with change, creating a cause and effect.  If we take the time to know our selves very well, we can more readily anticipate our reaction and smoothly move through the currents of life.   If we rush through life, ignoring or repressing parts of our self, it will be a bumpy road.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously.  And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

May we each have a child's heart today, filled with innocence, playfulness, forgiveness, and adventure.  Let our day be filled by honoring those we love and by sharing laughter with those surrounding us.  Let our hearts over flow with kindness towards our selves and others.

We can be thankful for our family's ancestors, our personal history, accomplishments and challenges, and good health.  There may be so much more to be desired, but just for this day, let us feel saturated with goodness and hold all distractions at bay.

I am thankful for many people and things which include those who read my words and for the opportunity to write.  Many blessings to all peoples near and far.

In the Moment

Whatever you are doing,

be aware of it.

Dipa Ma

Being in the moment, we monitor ourselves and realize when we are being kind and when we are being rude.  As human beings, we are not always compassionate and we frequently judge.  When we are able to be in the moment, to not be distracted, we are far more aware of our own behaviors. 

Our behaviors will never be perfect, but once we are aware, we have a greater opportunity to change how we act.  If we are irresponsible and move through life at a high pace, we may never monitor ourselves.  We may minimize our behavior or justify it falsely. 

As we monitor our behaviors, we see a broader picture instead of our own biased view.   We have greater listening skills and our keen observations prep us for better decision making.

When we are in the moment, we are more mindful in both speech and action.  We can make a better impression on others by allowing them to feel listened to and understood, even if we do not agree.  We do not have to challenge everything we hear or see, so we are not distracted by planning our defensive response.  We simply give ourselves permission to simply be present in the moment without drama or discernment.

When we practice mindfulness, we display respect and honor towards others which in turn creates a better feeling about ourselves.  Our ego is less likely to puff us up or bring us down.

Dreams are Puzzles

   

All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.

Edgar Allan Poe

We are told by Jonathan Parker that dreams revolve around several issues:

Wrong and Right

Attraction and Fears

Life and Death

Love and Hate

Masculine and Feminine

Freedom and Security

When we open our mind to dream interpretation we begin to develop an excellent resource for understanding our current life.   Whatever we experience throughout our day ... what we see, hear, touch, smell and speak ... becomes stored away  for possible use in our dreams.

A dream may be highly exaggerated to catch our attention and to make a point.  A drama might unfold within a dream where our current belief system is reflected.  Dream content is meant to expand our understanding whether it be for depth or laughter.  No matter who we dream about, the dream is always about our self.  The characters in our dream simply reflect an aspect about ourselves.  It is best to give dreams lots of room for interpretation.  Continue to examine our dream until we feel a connection with it and how it relates  to our life.

Once I had a dream that did not seem related to my life at all.  I studied it, turned it around, and shared it with a friend, but I could not find any personal meaning in it.  I recorded it in my dream journal and still it did not resonate with me.  I finally gave up, but a few days later when my friend asked about it, it unfolded itself ever so gently in my mind.  It made perfect sense! 

Dreams are like puzzles.  Sometimes we have to keep moving the pieces around until they gently fit together.  Instead of just seeing a piece of the puzzle or small groupings, we eventually see the pieces forming the whole picture.

And, yes, we all dream every night.  It is a matter of whether or not you remember dreams.

First and Last Identity

Be strong then,

and enter into your own body;

there you have a solid place for your feet.

Kabir

We spend so much time looking outside of ourselves for validation or unconditional love.  We need to accept ourselves just the way we are ... imperfect.  Imperfect in the sense that we are an unfinished product, still under construction, and vulnerable to unexpected change.

When our first identity is associated with being Buddha's Heart or Christ Consciousness or Divine Universe, we stand more firmly upon this ground.  As a spark of the Divine, we  experience being human through our family, work, community and belief systems.  We live more harmoniously remembering that our soul is unchanged in spite of  external human labeling.

Identifying with our spiritual nature, our human developments are less dramatic with more effective solutions.  As our perspective is clearly spiritual, every day happenings shift in importance.  

If we are seeking the answer to the question of "Who am I"

simply go within and connect with our soul.  Soul is the first identity we experienced coming into this incarnation and it will be our last identity as we depart.

The Option of Hope

 A man's face is his autobiography. 

A woman's face is her work of fiction.

Oscar Wilde

My dear friend Nancy is always directing me to wonderful information I would otherwise miss.  She brought to my attention a website by Jeff Foster.  Through his writing, I learned a  positive and supportive concept  regarding individuals facing  suicide, a subject we usually would choose to ignore.

Jeff Foster points out that many individuals considering suicide, really don't want to end their life, they just want to end the falseness that has been built into their lives.    The heaviness of dragging around masks of deception, and the pain of not being who they intended to be,  have created such a terrible burden they just want it to end.  Do they really want to die?  No, they just want the nightmare to end and at the moment, they cannot see any other way out as they are exhausted and desperate.  (Jeff Foster's website:  http://www.lifewithoutacentre.com )

Jeff Foster's website records the story of his presence with a suicidal wealthy single mom.  He was not there as a therapist, nor was he  there to talk her out of her decision.  He simply sat with her as a passive listener as she unloaded all of the burdens of her life.  Just his quiet presence encouraged her hour after hour to continue emptying the disappointments and disillusions of her life.

In time, the woman began to talk about what she originally intended for her life and the aspirations she held as a mother to her only child.  As she recalled her earlier dreams and desires, a spark of life returned to her.  She became curious as to how she might disassemble  her current life and rebuild her newly recalled dreams and desires.  She had created an option for herself, one that is available to us all ... hope.

It is never too late to reconstruct our lives rather than ending them.  It may take some doing, but the desire to return to our authentic self will give us hope which can be a brilliant light to lead us out of our darkness.

Don't Underestimate Yourself!

  

 

You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere.  You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.

Siddhartha Gautama

We are all faced with challenges, both big and small.  Sometimes we seem to have the confidence and momentum to just create an outline and bull doze our way right through the task.  If we are not in an emotionally strong place, however, we may feel overwhelmed with no resolutions in sight.

This is something we all face even though it may not appear to be this way on the outside.  Part of the human experience is facing challenges so we can learn, change and grow.  We are called to use our creativity and life experiences to deal with what ever presents it self.  Our initial attitude must be one of confidence whether real or imagined.

The first step is to brainstorm by ourselves.  Explore numerous possibilities even if they do not seem realistic.  If we need to, we can always include family or friends to help us create a positive plan of action.  Just don't procrastinate or additional things can be muddled into the mix.

The worst thing we can do is backslide into an attitude  of self-defeat, personal criticism, and destructive mind games.  The wrong question is "Why me?"  The appropriate question is "What lesson am I to learn from this?"  Once the lesson can be identified, we can breathe a sigh of relief and begin our lesson knowing there will be reward.  When we master a lesson, we become stronger with new information to be carried into the future to help ourselves again, or to help others.

Just remember to believe in our personal abilities and focus on positive resolutions.  Stay grounded or centered until the right course of action becomes clear.  Believe we have the courage, the knowledge, and endurance to see this challenge through.  Remain aware that we are never alone, we are powerful, and we can move through any crisis.

For additional support, call to mind others who have faced excruciating obstacles and surpassed limitations.  Be inspired by other personal victories and believe with a full heart that we are deserving of both love and accomplishment!

My Sacred Space

Your sacred space is where you find yourself

again, and again.

Joseph Campbell

Today was the first day I walked solo again since my fall five weeks ago.  It was a matter of stepping through fear, ignoring ego's resistance, and doing what I longed to do. 

Fortunately, it was a glorious pathway back into nature without any mis-steps.  I found myself joyful to reconnect with favorite scenes and sounds.  Neighborhood yards had shifted into fall decorations, leaves had turned, and there was a crispness in the air. 

As I walked carefully and slowly, my body began to relax back into the routine I had followed for years.  My feet seemed confident,  my rhythm was steady, and my heart was held wide open.  I had returned to my sacred space where all of my surroundings were nature's sanctuary. 

By the time I reached home, I was happy and restored.  I more fully believed that I had simply had an accident and that my age had nothing to do with the fall.  I was amazed at how much better I felt to have returned to what had always been so familiar.  I felt nurtured and connected again with my self, the earth, and the spirits that surround ... my sacred space.

We Are All Called

Do not die with your music still in you!

Wayne Dyer

What makes the heart sing?  Are there words to the music we only  hum?  Where does the cadence of happiness originate?  Who creates the melody accompanying joy?

We all have a song of some sort within our heart.  A melody, perhaps, that brings us comfort or inspiration.  A dream that needs to be set in motion.  As unique human beings, we all have an original score to bring out into the world. 

We are not all Masters or Artists, but this is not a reason to prevent each of us from contributing in creative ways, big or small.  There are inventors, entrepreneurs, and explorers, who are every day people being brave enough to submit their notes out into the world. 

Lyrics come in dreams, conversations, and literature we choose to read.  They present themselves during exercise or cleaning or watching a child play. 

Inspiration needs to be shared, as we are all called to create.  Whether it is a matter of sharing a garden flower arrangement or an undeveloped scientific formula, we are called to leave a trace of our authentic selves in the midst of others.  We can extend this creative part of ourselves either discreetly or boldly, however we decide.  Just follow through and do it!

Meaningful Existence

I don't know Who --- or what --- put the question.  I don't know when it was put.  I don't even remember answering.  But at some moment I did answer Yes to Someone --- or Something --- and from that hour I was certain that existence is meaningful and that therefore, my life, in self-surrrender, had a goal.

Dag Hammarskjold

Secretary General of the United Nations

Within each of us, there is a small soft voice speaking to us.  It is underneath all of the self-criticism being spewed by our ego, under the analytical brainstorming of our mind, and under our lonely hearts.  The small voice patiently waits for each of us to be still long enough to listen.

Eckhart Tolle tells us to lean into a tree to discover stillness.  With our fast paced society, we have forgotten how to be still.  Many of us experience stillness only when we fall exhausted into a restless sleep.

The still small voice that awaits our attention is sometimes called God or Buddha or Allah or Divine Mother or Universal Love.  The title is unimportant, but the substance is vital to our purpose and unfolding.  Meaningful existence can be created through a deep connection when we at last surrender to the wisdom within. 

Listening takes time and patience, but the whispers can be heard while reading, or walking or listening to music.  Stilling the mind is important, but we all do not have to sit and meditate or contemplate in order to discover the spiritual connection.

Hearing the whispers of wisdom is important, but things do not stop there.  We learn to trust and have faith, we begin to surrender to greater intentions than self-pleasing goals.  Surrendering is difficult as it prompts change that we are not always prepared to make. 

How will this change my approach to life?  Will this impact the lives of my loved ones?  Am I to believe this is really true?  Can I have more guidance and direction?  When will like minded beings join me in this effort?  All of these questions and more pave the path to a meaningful existence.  We do not need to live in poverty or give up rewards we have earned, but we may be led to use them differently to impact those who surround us.  We may be called to extend more kindness or compassion or to see life with an open heart rather than through tinted lenses.

When we have established a heart connection with the wisdom within, we lead fuller and more productive lives.  Our existence takes on deeper meaning during the stillness we create.  We  no longer feel alone and our purpose in life becomes inspiring, not only to ourselves, but to others as well. 

***Inspired by Mark Nepo's newly released book, SEVEN THOUSAND WAYS TO LISTEN.

The House All Humans Live In

A friend

may well be reckoned

the masterpiece of Nature.

Ralph Waldo Emerson



Thinking of our world as the house all humans live in, we are called to extend our kindness, respect, and honor into a larger arena.  As we broaden our definition of friend, we begin to treat all people in a friendlier manner.   As strangers become friendly, our concept of the world shifts from a largely foreign place to a community of friends.  When we begin to experience our life as being in a friendly environment, our environment begins to change.  Perception once changed can color our surroundings from black and white to vibrant colors with complimentary hues.

When we enhance the  attitude we offer  to our world, we begin to receive an improved response.  The improved response lifts our spirits and encourages to pass forward more happiness and joy.  We are more apt to extend a hand of kindness to neighbors, old friends, and to appreciate the beauty in nature more and more.  We will have a stronger sense of being connected rather than experiencing loneliness in an isolated world.

***This post was inspired by a writing in TRANSITIONS.  Julia Cameron is a well known writer and author of numerous best selling books.  She has written poetry and essays; has credits in television, films, and theater; and is an award winning journalist.  In her book entitled, TRANSITIONS, Prayers and Declarations for a Changing Life, Julia Cameron offers ways to face challenges while developing creativity.

The Artist Within

The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising and gave to it neither power nor time.

Mary Oliver

Individuals every where have a special gift or talent.  Unfortunately, many of us take the gift or talent for granted or never use it at all.  If we channel our gift into a creative expression, it would allow us to feel more satisfied, complete or full.

When we use our gift, we generate a higher level of self-esteem  which impacts our body, mind, and spirit.   We physically feel better, we have more clarity from stress relief, and might even be able to share or teach our talent to someone else.

Whether it is writing poetry, playing tennis or designing a flower garden, creative expression adds depth to our sense of living.  The self-imposed expectation of perfection often crimps our flair or stops us dead in our tracks.  The desire to master adds more pressure to our attempt to simply enjoy and drags competition along with it.  We need to be free and not limit ourselves through self-criticism and judgment. 

Discover  a desire or passion  for something whether it be antiquing, photography or art.  If we do not have a sense of what we want to do, explore classes or community resources.  Experience several opportunities until something really resonates.  If we already know our strength, we can volunteer at a kids club or senior center to share what we do best.  We can create an art studio or a writing room or a sacred place in the corner of a room. 

The importance of blending creative expression into our lives is that it makes us expand our awareness of ourselves and helps us to feel more alive.  It reduces our mind chatter and assists us in connecting with other levels of reality.  What is that old saying, "Use it or lose it!"

Heroes



Heroes

By Jared Jenkins

 

 

In war, there are lives risked and lives taken

Men and women giving their best to defend what they love

They defend their country

Their honor

Their people

 

Some call them soldiers

Others call them heroes

 

Our veterans have risked their lives for us

They have lived through hell and fought with honor

Many have killed

And regret doing so

 

For every life, there is a soul

For every soul, there is a life

For those who have died, we show great appreciation and remembrance

For those who live, along with them live the horrific memories of battle

Some, memories of defeat

Some, memories of victory

 

Our veterans were more than soldiers

They were, and still are heroes

Equal Time

Let me tell you this:  if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it's not because they enjoy solitude.  It's because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.

Jodi Picoult

My Sister's Keeper



Jodi Picoult is an interesting author.  She has excellent character development and deals with difficult life issues.  Sometimes, however, she takes the reader through emotional drama and then ends the story without comforting resolve. 

Her most recent book, SING YOU HOME, is filled with challenge and heart rendering situations.  I agreed to read it only because my daughter promised it had a good ending.  I was thoroughly engaged in the book, as all of the characters were real to life facing difficulties that many face in our culture today.  My heart was tugged in diverse directions.

Once finished, I recalled another excellent book of Jodi Picoult's, MY SISTER'S KEEPER.  It is where the above quote was found.   This author scripts words which make me think just a little harder.

I have perceived myself as a loner throughout my life and yes, I have had my share of disappointments from others.  As much as I enjoy relationships, I most generally require equal time in solitude.  I do not believe I hide or that I am bitter.  I just enjoy quiet, time alone, or just being.  

We all need to determine the blend or mix for what we need and then build strong boundaries to make certain our needs are met and protected.  I guess it doesn't matter what other people assume determines our behavior as long as we are happy with it!

Compass Within

He used to say we all had a compass inside of us and what we needed to do was to find it and to follow it.

Ann Patchett

STATE OF WONDER

We all have a compass whether we name it soul or heart or Divine.  This source constantly urges us to stay the course, but some times the winds are so mighty against our sails,  we sail off course in directions we weren't necessarily meant to go. 

Storms can detain us in darkness where we aimlessly venture from one shore to another.  When the winds have calmed and our vessel has regained balance, we begin to hear the whispers of guidance once again.  With the sun on our faces, we grow more certain of the way we must travel and we set out  on our journey more determined than before.

After time, we allow the gentle breeze to lull our vessel in perfect cadence with our beating heart.  With peace and calm, we gently float in the reflection of the cascading moon.

 

Bittersweet

The curious paradox is that

when I accept myself just as I am,

then I can change.

Carl Rogers

The fall wind blows and the autumn leaves float by my window, dancing their way down in their last free fall.   I cannot help but wonder if their spinning is filled with joy or sorrow.  Perhaps the experience of the great fall is bittersweet.

This particular autumn, I find myself to be similar to the leaves.  I am in a free fall, floating in and out of bittersweet thoughts.   The swirling motion of the wind jumbles my feelings and blows my sense of balance away.  The sounds of the branches shaking the leaves, drowns out spiritual whispers usually supporting me.

When left to spiral alone, too easily I forget who I am.  The critical gust from others shakes my confidence while old flight patterns surface in the air and carry me farther away from where I yearn to be.

Once the wind calms, I find myself gently floating down a stream.  My reflection reminds me of all that I am and all there is left for me to be.  The tug of the current pulls me forward and I am excited, ready to embrace a bittersweet change in me.



I Miss You Like Hell ...

Where you used to be,

there is a hole in the world,

which I find myself constantly

walking around in the daytime,

and falling in at night.

I miss you like hell.

Edna St. Vincent Millay



It has been a few days now since death claimed the life of my friend's daughter.  I continue to fumble with appropriate words and refuse to utter time worn phrases that at the moment sound shallow and small.  The truth that I hold is no mother should ever out live her child.  I cannot imagine anything more painful.

The services will only be another comma in a very long drawn out sentence.  The sentence may run on for years until the time comes when  a new sentence can be structured offering a new beginning.  There will be opportunities for healing and forgiveness for this senseless accident, but there will never be a time when the mother stops holding her child in her heart. 

My friend is a very vibrant woman, and very out spoken.  She has magnificent blue eyes begging us not to forget her daughter.  She yearns to hear stories of how people knew her daughter, what their experiences were, and how they will remember her .... forever.

Her circle of friends will remain steadfast by her side.  She will have support from many paths as she plays many roles in the lives of others ... wife, mother, teacher, community participant, student, writer, and dancer.  In time, her best ally will be her very own self.

I will continue to keep this family in a bubble of love, energy and light, hoping they will pull together instead of a part.  I pray this family will move towards the light, healing each other in their own special way, never forgetting daughter, sister, loved one and friend. 

Celebration For What Remains ...

The stuff of our lives doesn't change.

It is we who change in relations to it.

Molly Vass

Reluctantly, I attended a meditation dedicated to a family who had a daughter, sister, wife, loved one whisked out of their lives without any notice.  I worried that the meditation would become dramatic and more depressing than the situation already was, as if that were possible.  But I was very inaccurate in my suspicions, as the evening left me feeling uplifted, strong, and honoring the lives of many.

We sat in a circle of faces known and unknown, both young and old.  There was a table in the middle of the room holding candles and items people had brought for the family ... an altar of sorts.  There were shells, rocks, necklaces, flowers and symbolic pieces of love.  We all signed a card as well as a small notebook our friend could turn to when she randomly needed to hear support when none was available to her. 

A puja was offered ... a puja is two circles with participants facing each other.  Only the outer circle moves to the left while the inner stationery circle holds the person across from them with the hands, eyes, and loving kindness enveloping them.  This may sound simple, but it is an extraordinary experience of silent communication.  It offers a safe place to release grief, love, forgiveness or any repressed emotions.  A few moments of being present in each others lives.

Artistic dance and expression followed.  In a circle, one by one, each participant was allowed the time to express what they were feeling through movement and the circle duplicated each individual sacred gesture. 

We also sat in a circle, allowing each person time to articulate their intentions for the family ... strength, hope, forgiveness, spiritual connection, beginning new paths.  Sentiments were also offered for the safe passage of this young vibrant woman into the thereafter, being greeted by what ever waited for her on the other side. 

There was drumming and chanting, freeing our spirits to join together in love, peace, and hope ... all energies extended to the table altar symbolizing the grieving family.  All lives were honored.  Lives of those present, past and yet to come.  Hopeful inspirations were abundant.

Driving home, I was so thankful I had attended this eclectic gathering of loved ones and friends.  It was not a morbid mourning of what was lost, but rather a hopeful celebration for everything remaining.

Spiritual Team



The purpose of our journey on this precious earth is now to align our personalities with our souls.  It is to create harmony, cooperation, sharing, and reverence for Life.  It is to grow spiritually.  This is our new evolutionary pathway.  The old pathway ~ pursuing the ability to manipulate and control ~ no longer works.  It now produces only violence and destruction.

~Gary Zukav~


Years ago, I had a friend who was always kind, thoughtful, and happy.  I mean always.  She was sincere not at all false in her efforts.  Everyone loved being in her presence.  I had the opportunity to spend a length of time  with her, and I knew I would see her true nature.  I was amazed to discover that 24/7, she was as heartfelt as anyone I had ever met.  I asked her, "Marge, don't you ever get tired of being happy?"  She looked at me confused as she clearly didn't know what I was talking about. 

My continuously happy friend Marge was intimately connected with Divinity.  She was completely integrated with body, mind, and spirit.  When puzzled over something, she would pray, meditate or contemplate until the issue was resolved.  She never reacted out of anger or disappointment.  She felt every emotion I ever felt, but unlike me, she experienced life like she was a part of a spiritual team.  She did not face life alone.

We have more choice than we are willing to believe.  When we wake up do we choose to be grumpy or happy?  Are we selective with our kindness?  Do we spend time doing what we love or what we rather not do? 

We always have resources at hand, but we do not always use them.  We have hunches, insights, and gut feelings about decisions we are about to make.  Do we pay attention to our intuition?  If we are so totally disconnected from the God within, we may never hear the guidance available confirming that we are never alone.



Encased in a Bubble

 Though it will always be difficult

To find the words for what you feel,

May you find ease in that awkwardness

Until gradually from beneath

The gravel of stuttered sounds

The pure flow of you emerges.

John O'Donohue

To Bless the Space Between Us

There is no sunshine, just a promise of rain.  I feel absolutely the same.  There is no sun shining  in my heart, and the clouds are moving in with tears.  I long for the release of emotion, and feel as though I may burst in the process.

Words are my strength, stringing them lovingly together, and yet today, my words are utterly useless.  They are awkward and clumsy leaving my thoughts and feelings trapped inside.

Word spread through my circle of friends  of a terrible loss.  I feel completely inadequate to offer any words of comfort as I know at this point, there are no healing words.  No phrases could possibly ease the pain and there are no sayings able to drain the anger from the heart. 

In solitude, I hold my friend and her family in my mind's eye.  I cover them with love, energy, and light hoping they will each find a healthy way to deal with their pain and loss.  I encase them in a golden light, mentally placing them in a bubble to maintain spiritual support for as long as they may need.

Continuing in quiet, I mentally hold this circle of friends in the palms of my hands.  I cover them with energy, love and light.  I send the intention of courage and wisdom  so we may all support our friend and allow ourselves to discover acceptance and healing as well.  May we stand present with our friend while finding a new way to begin again.

Pocket of Time

 

                       The time to change was yesterday;

                             the time to wake up is now.

                                         Judge Judy

Hopefully we all remembered to turn our clocks back last night.  The only way I can remember which direction to turn the clock hands is using the old phrase, spring forward and fall back. 

For as long as I can remember, I have not liked this changing of time.  Some how, my body doesn't get the message about the time change so my eating schedule is askew and I have difficulty adjusting my sleeping habits.

When it stays light out until 8:30 or 9:00 pm, I am much more active.  I wake up of a morn greeted by daylight.  I spend the day following my schedule whatever it may be, and then prepare for the next section of time after dinner as bedtime is hours away. 

Unfortunately, my mind is easily tricked by the time change.  I wake up and it is still dark, so I am happy to go back to sleep.  Then my entire day is out of routine.  After dinner, I glance out the window and see that it is dark and automatically think it is time for my pajamas and a good book, but it is only 6:00 pm.  It seems like I miss the entire segment between dinner and bedtime.  When it is dark, I am not eager to go for a walk, or run over to the store, or attend a meeting.  I want to settle in.

The day I retired I took off my lovely watch, never to wear it again.  I seem to run better on my own inner clock with an unknown time zone.  I have learned time is very elastic and retractable.  When I am enjoying what I am doing, my hours and minutes fly by; contrarily, when I am stuck in a long line, time either stands still or stretches endlessly. 

There is conversation about time in terms of living parallel lives ... now how is that for messing with time.  And who watches the clock for those believing in previous life  and after life?  My favorite, however, are the pockets of time.  They by far are my favorite place in time.  Pockets of time are those places we find ourselves totally absorbed in something, so mesmerized all concept of time has been lost.  We almost startle out of our reverie, gasping, "what time is it?"  To our surprise, we find that only 10 or maybe 15 minutes have passed by while we were spending hours in our private pocket of time.

Heart of My Soul

Some persons are very decisive

when it comes to avoiding decisions.

Brendan Francis

My mind has been a muddle for several weeks now.  I have been longing for new insight, for spiritual stimulation, and for ancient wisdom to unfold.  My search has taken me to a dead end without resolution.   I have been frustrated and discouraged as my expectations go unmet.

Then it is as though an unseen mentor pulls a heavy curtain to the side and I see with new eyes a passage way overlooked before.  The hallway is filled with warmth, light, and understanding.  It seems to embrace me in such a way that I realize I am being led down a path into the heart of my soul.

Sitting ...  being ...  in solitude,  I find company with myself once again.  I pull in all of my energy being wasted on outward searches and let it rekindle my own truth.  I open my heart to trust in the spiritual process, knowing that soon I will be led.

Within hours, I receive Mark Nepo's wonderful new book, SEVEN THOUSAND WAYS TO LISTEN.  I skim through it excitedly and as I go to put it on the bookshelf, I discover a writing of Gary Zukav. THE MIND OF THE SOUL resonated within me and thankfully my favorite parts are  heavily highlighted!  Returning to my computer, a particular DAILY OM is waiting for me about The Start of Change.  And so it all falls together.

I feel alive again, empowered and ready to cartwheel down this corridor which had been temporarily hidden from me.  In my own small thinking, I have been avoiding my own self-worth.  Doors kept closing of course, until I was safely corralled back into the heart of my soul.  I have yet again learned another lesson and it is good to be me!

"Let Your Note Be Clear" ~ Rumi

"God picks up the reed-flute world and blows.
Each note is a need coming through one of us,
a passion, a longing pain.
Remember the lips
where the wind-breath originated,
and let your note be clear.
Don't try to end it.
Be your note."

-- Rumi

Dennis Merritt Jones is an Award-winning author, Keynote speaker, and spiritual mentor.  My daughter brought him to my attention with an article entitled:  Let Your Note Be Clear:
Are You Listening to Your Emotions?   He was referencing the poem by Rumi displayed above.

We all have longings or yearnings which we choose to disregard.  We distract our selves and repress the feelings whether out of fear or anxiety.  To pay attention to the nagging feelings, we just may be called to action and therefore we resist.

What if these repressed ideas were really unexpressed desires of the soul?  What if these random thoughts were messages from deep within us.  They could be prompts to redirect our intentions. 

In choosing to repress emotions, the energy builds within us and eventually can manifest itself in our physical bodies.  If we would take brief moments to at least acknowledge the promptings we receive, we would be advancing ourselves emotionally or mentally, physically, and spiritually. 

Not all messages are exciting or joyful, some are actually painful.  Once we embrace the emotion as a teacher, we will learn the lesson, release the fear, and freely move forward. 

Rumi says to "let your note be clear" and to do this, we must sit with our longings, and understand the message.  If we believe the yearnings from our inner being have been lovingly sent by the Divine, we will be able to navigate through our lives gaining wisdom as we honor and respect the message received.

Needs and Wants

She did not need much,

wanted very little.

A kind word, sincerity, fresh air

clean water, a garden, kisses

books to read, sheltering arms

a cosy bed, and to love

and be loved in return.

Starra Neely Blade 

It doesn't seem to matter how old we are, where we live, or what we do.    Our wants and needs tend to be similar and quite simple ... to love and be loved.   These needs and wants are met in various ways and rather inconsistently throughout our lives.

As a child, we may be so eager to please others, we may not be aware of our own wants and needs.  We may use all of our energy in pleasing others, hoping to be loved in return.  On occasion, we may have the opportunity to express what we want or what we need, but in our eagerness to understand others, we have not understood ourselves. 

There comes a time and place where we come to realize our own exhaustion from giving too much and receiving not nearly enough in return.  At this point, we begin to learn how to nurture ourselves, and how to best meet our needs or wants.

When we have a sense of who we are, we can have faith and hope that our desires and dreams will unfold.  In the meantime, however, we must begin to build a life of support and honor.  If we do not tenderly care for ourselves, then why should anyone else?