Permission Granted

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"It isn't kind to your children to let your needs build up

until you explode.  If you need a break, take one.

If you need a big break, take one.  The harm is not

in taking breaks but in thinking we must get angry or turn against

our kids in some other way to justify the break."

 

Hugh Prather

Spiritual Notes to Myself

 

 

 

When children are little, they push and push against our tolerance until we send everyone to their rooms.  Teens act out extending our patience until it is thin.  In both situations, the one doing the pushing and the one being pushed  are really needing attention or recognition or the comfort of tender care.

 

It was always amazing to me how tolerant and patient I would try to be as a  mother, but disappointing myself by retaliating against anyone near me.  Everyone would scamper off and silence would surround me.  I remember wondering why I had not done this an hour earlier before I lost my temper.

 

We somehow believe that enduring the rudeness or inconsideration of others will win us some sort of badge or patch like in the scouts.  We tell ourselves that we are spiritual beings forgetting that we are also human. 

 

Some of us don't even know what our needs are so how can we ask for them to be met while others don't feel worthy to have any goodness placed at their feet.  We must learn to not see needing a break as a weakness.  It is a form of nurturing, healing and restoring.

 

So rather than be a martyr of motherhood, or a grumpy mate, I hear by grant you permission for taking a break for as long as needed.  If we treat ourselves as we would treat our best friend, we may just grow into being the best friend ever ... to ourselves!