See You Next Year!

"A time will come

when you will empty out

into the universe,

Taking to your heart

the light of ages

now and long ago.

You will spread

as dandelion wings

into the vast distances

of past and future,

And be filled

with all the splendours

of the heavens.

You will hear your name

chanted through the void in

strange and lovely languages

inviting you to follow

and expand;

And you will be one with them

knowing each, in intimate communion

[as your sister]

as your brother

and your lover

and your friend."

Jane Marie Thibault

 

 

For all of you, I hope you have come to terms with the events of 2013.  I don't mean to suppress, repress or dissociate from your feelings, but to truly feel them and allow them to pass.  Let go and recall the good things that surfaced in your life, no matter how great or small.

 

As you enter the New Year of 2014, I wish you imagination and creativity while planning intentions.  Allow this new time to be filled with creativity disallowing the illusion of fear to keep you small. 

 

Identify your fears and determine if they are fact or more fiction.  Break goals down into small steps, advancing as the year passes.  Allow your desires to stay foremost in your mind as you create activities each and every day.  

 

There is something to be said for keeping our dreams to ourselves so no one will talk us out of them, but if you have a trusted friend or mentor you can share and receive supportive feedback.  When we speak of our dreams to a trusted person, it makes everything seem more possible. 

 

Many blessings to all of you in this forthcoming New Year of 2014.  Clean your slates and begin anew.  See you next year!



Extending Peace

 

 

 

 

I am at peace with everyone. No one is capable of making you upset without your consent, so if you begin practicing the intention to be authentic and peaceful with everyone, you connect to peace itself—and gain the power to change the energy of your relationships with family and friends. Wayne Dyer The writings of Wayne Dyer have been on my book shelf longer than many others.  His work came to my attention very early on, and I am encouraged to report he has grown, evolved, and stayed very much the same person.  He never got carried away by fame or changed his statements in order to fit in with current thought.  He stayed true to himself and has prospered.  I admire him and still enjoy his books very much. In one of his recent writings, he was talking about the price we pay for not being authentic to others.  We personally pay a price for not being real.  To change this way of interacting, we first must start with our selves.  We must assess how we view ourselves as well as others.  Part of this is about judgment of ourselves and others.  People treat us however we allow them to, so we ourselves have set the pattern.  So we can decide that on a certain level, we forgive ourselves as well as others and begin again.  While we place our focus on peace, criticism of others and of ourselves falls away.  We consciously choose to live in the moment which is filled with calm.  We need to let go of others, allowing them be however they feel they need to be, and respect ourselves enough to be able to meet and greet without stirring all of our emotions to the fore front. We have no control over others, so we cannot truly change them.  We can change, however, how we present to them.  If we are offering them peace, we are respecting our personal preference for peace at all times.  We can openly come into contact, extending acceptance, and then excuse ourselves.  Our goal is not to suddenly become super peaceful and throw ourselves into a den of vipers.  Remember, we change only ourselves. So when come face to face with our least favorite relative or friend, we can quietly say to our selves, "I meet you with peace."  It no longer matters how they act or what they say.  We stayed aligned with peace, remain authentic, and move along. When we realize that others are reacting to life based on their own personal experiences, we no longer take things so personally.  Their issues are just that ... their issues.  When we can be thankful for the lesson they have taught us we allow forgiveness to override our association with emotional pain.  Some of our best teachers have been those who have deeply hurt us. As we continue to nurture ourselves, we find the opinions others have about us mean less and less.  Our personal assessment is far more important.  Connected with our soul in the presence of the Divine, we are able to extend peace to others without going against ourselves. (Based on a writing by Wayne Dyer) drwaynedyer.com

 

 





The Heart of the Matter

 

 

 

"A single word is sufficient to reveal the truth."

Shen Hui

 

 

Just as our soul is hidden inside our physical body, underneath our clothing, and protected by our extended aura of protection, so is our heart felt truth.  Without focus, behind scattered thoughts, and tempered by defenses, how we truly feel often times is never revealed.

 

At times, we may feel that hiding our true feelings is an easy way out.  With an attempt to be non-committal, we stir up the waters and create waves, sending the listeners into the sunset as they wonder how the conversation floated so far off course. 

 

When questioning the person who is so often misleading,  statements are made,  such as:  "People don't need to know what I believe," or "It is none of their business what I intend to do," or "I knew they would disagree with me."  These comments remind me of the man who goes to the doctor reporting his foot is aching when in fact it is his right arm.  The patient's attitude is that if the doctor is really as good as they say, he will figure it out.

 

It is no wonder that our world is in such conflict, globally, within each country, inside each community, and surfacing in families.  Individuals misspeaking, mislead themselves.  Every word that is not authentically spoken,  will dilute the potency of the speaker.  We intentionally mislead others, but we also mislead our inner selves. 

 

If we endeavor to keep our responses brief, but truthful, we feel better about ourselves for honoring and respecting what we believe.  We project an authentic image of ourselves and a more heartfelt exchange is experienced.  Truth remains at the heart of the matter.

 

 

 



Fine Tuning

 

 

 

 

"There are sounds to seasons.

There are sounds to places

and there are sounds to every

time in one's life."

 

Alison Wyrley Birch

 

 

Music can be  a tool for relaxing and calming. It can liven  things up if you play rock and roll, hip-hop, rap or even polkas.  Hymns can help people mourn, celebrate, and praise.   Wedding songs can touch hearts of the young and old.  With each season and with every cycle, certain music can be associated  with memories triggering either sadness or joy.

 

When I was trained in the use of tuning forks, I read that earlier in history, people heard all necessary tones to keep themselves balanced through church songs, cultural lyrics, bells in towers, and more solitude to hear daily the sounds in nature. 

 

Our society has changed a great deal, and these tones for balancing are no longer heard on any kind of regular basis.  So by learning the skill to use tuning forks, I was able to experiment with friends, family, and myself  with different tones and how they impacted our physical, mental and spiritual balance. 

 

Sound healing has been used by massage therapists, energy workers, and other professionals as background music to calm the client as well as the working atmosphere.  When I visit my dentist, I can even choose what kind of music I want to listen to in the room.   There are some people who even pre-select their favorite music for their funeral service.

 

We can monitor ourselves while driving our car.  If we are up tight, then turn the radio off or choose a favorite CD.  If we find ourselves running low on energy and have several errands yet to run, turn on some bright and cheery sounds.  And if feeling lonely, turn on some old tunes and dance like no one is watching!

 



 

 

 

 

Wiggle Room

 

 

Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are

appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible ~ the kind of

atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.

 

Virginia Satir

 

Some of us have been blessed with relatives who have been supportive and encouraging throughout our life; however, many of us have found a truer sense of family in the friends we have gathered along the way.  The emphasis really needs to be placed on providing ourselves a peaceful atmosphere no matter who the humans happen to be.  

If we do not feel as though we have any source of positive support, we need to expand our circle of contacts.  Whether we attend a different church, join a book club, or discover a new group of interesting people.  If we are lacking, then we must pick up the slack and provide.

I will once again refer to one of my favorite thoughts about being a verb rather than a noun for spirit.  A noun sits in place waiting to be provided.  A verb allows spirit to move around increasing the opportunities for connection.  We must do our part.

So during this holiday season, if we find ourselves discouraged by the lack of support or acceptance, reach out in a new way.  When we put ourselves in motion, Divine Spirit can navigate circumstances more easily.  We can meet anyone at any twist or turn so just move about. 

One of my favorite stories about connection was given to me by a one time neighbor.  She was not been in relationship and was lonely.  She tried to remain active in hopes of meeting new people.  One day, she stopped at an ATM which happened to be in the process of repair.  She began chatting with the gentleman working on the machine and much to their surprise, they felt an immediate connection.  They later married.

So don't try to orchestrate everything on the agenda.  Leave some wiggle room for the Universe to provide.  We may find some of the strangers we pass every day are potential friends just waiting to meet.  Be nice and let the light shine!

A More Direct Journey

 

 

 

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet

confinement of your aloneness

to learn

 

anything or anyone

that does not bring you alive

 

is too small for you.

 

David Whyte

House of Belonging

Over the holidays, we tend to gather with friends, neighbors, and relatives that we might not regularly see.  At odd times, we may feel disconnected with some of these acquaintances to the point of feeling guilty.  With hindsight, we may even feel sad about how things just feel differently.

Other people change and so do we, as it is the dance of life.  In either situation,  emotionally departing or being left behind, a newly established distance may be uncomfortable.   This separation is a necessary step to create new space for new growth.  Letting go can be difficult if we focus just on the loss we feel.  We desire to remain comfortable in our predictable surroundings. When we turn our eyes forward, believing new opportunity is forthcoming, we can prepare patience for transition.

It is during the holidays when emotions are a little closer to the surface, that we may be more aware of relationship change.  As the New Year approaches, it is a good time to take stock of what no longer supports us and what will invigorate our passage of transition.

To a certain degree, we once again need to face what is best suited for our own healthy boundaries.  The questions remain the same, "Who makes me feel burdened and who brings me alive?"  This is not about judgment or a false sense of superiority.  It is about truly knowing the 'self' so that we can pursue a more directed journey.

On This Day, and Every Day.

 

 

 

Christmas
by Anonymous

 

Every time a hand reaches out
To help another... that is Christmas.
Every time someone puts anger aside
And strives for understanding
That is Christmas.
Every time people forget their differences
And realize their love for each other
That is Christmas.
May this Christmas bring us
Closer to the spirit of human understanding
Closer to the blessing of peace!

 

 

 

On this day and every day, may we take one step closer, truly sensing our oneness.  When we look into each others eyes, may we see heart and soul connected rather than divided.  We can strive for the common denominator linking us together rather than the spike that drives us apart. 

 

Perhaps we can find the child of innocence in each other, and create relationships out of respect and honor.  May we revere each others cultures, allowing space for learning and understanding.  We can come to appreciate the rituals others hold dear without imposing our own.

 

Let us journey together, each in our own way, but compatible.  We can keep life simple rather than complicated.  We can enhance the world jointly rather than competitively.  Our intelligence can be channeled into healing rather than destroying. 

 

As we set judgment aside, let us pick up loving kindness.  By filling our hearts and minds with love, we can create a world with less suffering and pain.  Our lights will shine so strongly, no one will be left in darkness.

 



 





A Ritual on Christmas Eve

 

 

 

Trees

 

I think that I shall never see

A poem as lovely as a tree.

 

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest

Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;

 

A tree that looks at God all day.

And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

 

A tree that may in summer wear

A nest of robins in her hair;

 

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;

Who intimately lives with rain.

 

Poems are made by fools like me.

But only God can make a tree.

 

Joyce Kilmer

 

 

There is a woman who lives in my heart, her presence always felt.  I haven't visited her in years, in fact, but I know just where she lives.  Her sweet bungalow always open to travelers, sits in the middle of a woodland by a pond. 

 

She walks amongst these trees throughout the seasons and can be easily found at the foot of almost any tree.  She paints, writes, sketches, sings and praises with little critters and deer seem to gather especially close by.   There is a deer path one can follow which always leads to and from the pond, but my friend knows her way and follows only her heart.

 

I have had the privilege of visiting her in every season each offering abundance in pleasure, art and nature's gifts.  She gathers kindred spirits from all walks of life.  Conversations wander late into the night through depths of the unknown.  Hearts are filled with wisdom as spirit calls us farther onto our paths with passion and desire. 

 

On this Christmas Eve  her ritual will be alone as usual, walking in the woods with her basket filled with small tokens of  gifts to be placed at the base of  every tree.  With her are  little packets of seeds she has made for the birds and nuts for the squirrels.   Her loving heart extends to all that lives seen and unseen in the presence of the trees. 

 

As she wanders day light slips from the sky.   She lights her candle in time to catch her angelic reflection at the edge of the water in the pond.  God and Goddess hear her songs as her voice is filled with joy to be living among the sprites and trees.  She never feels alone nor fears the dark.  Her heart and mind are filled with bliss, no time for worry or strife.

 

The sound of her drum can be heard as the moon and stars light the path  back home.  Tonight she will not paint in her studio, nor will she compose in her den.  She will sip hot chocolate by the fireplace and lose herself into the dancing flames.  This her ritual, has always been.

 

My friend can  shape ship into mother, maiden and crone.  She is all that has ever been and offers all that could possibly be visulalized or seen.  She lives in the present when she needs to be found, but otherwise she is out there in the trees.

 

Rebecca is her given name and we see each other only in occasional dreams.  It is doubtful that our paths will ever actually cross again, but we will recognize each other even if unseen. In spirit I am with her, especially for her ritual on Christmas Eve.



This Holy Season ... Church, Synagogue, Wall

 

 

 

 

“In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukkah' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukkah!' or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall!”

― Dave Barry

 

 

Brainwashing was interrupted when I was a child.  I attended a Roman Catholic School, a Lutheran Church, and my neighborhood was Jewish.  The individual teachings of each sector drew questions in my expanding brain as to who really had the 'true' faith.  One can only imagine what happened to my ever stretching brain when I encountered the belief system of Jehovah Witnesses.  In my less educated mind, still innocent, I truly pondered the inconsistencies of the surrounding wisdom.  When one lives in a city, one is exposed to diversity which I found to be curiouser and curiouser.

 

My understanding of people came from observing them in depth.  In little ways, I found it rather easy to find the heart within each person.  It was a bit like Halloween with everyone dressed differently, but ah, the heart, was always there, waiting to be loved.  We all had feelings and felt as though we were judged.  Opinions were formed by personal experience and how we had been treated or mistreated.  Assumptions were made and competition thrived in spite of us all yearning for the same. 

 

Unfortunately, I was one of those little kids who was always asking, "What is your favorite color?  What is your favorite food?  Who is your favorite person?"  Looking back, I wonder who taught me  to focus on one and only one choice.  Why couldn't I embrace all things having temporary shifts of preference.  The word favorite sounds so exclusive and limiting.

 

When my youngest son was little, I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up.  He immediately responded, "A fire truck."  I laughed and corrected him by saying, "Oh you mean a fire man!"  He looked me right in the eye like I was totally ignorant and repeated, "No.  A fire truck."  Thank goodness I had the sense to let it be.  How easily we squelch other peoples dreams. 

 

So as we grow deeper into the holy days, let us try to embrace the diversity of others, both big and small.  We don't have to condone, but we really need to respect each other.  As families gather, our children watch our behaviors as much as we observe theirs.  We can't expect them to act differently then who we have allowed them to be all year and it confuses them to see us not reflecting what we have preached all along.

 

Integrity, for me, is defined by who we are when no one is watching.  Who that person is, is the one I carry with me into this holy season whether it leads me into church or synagogue, but hopefully not a wall.

 

 

 

 

 



 

Hold Open the Heart

 

 

"Open my heart to true caring and pure love.

Let my words and deeds be motivated

by sincerity and kindness."

 

Alan Cohen

A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE

 

 

The holiday season whether Hanukkah or Christmas is filled with mind chatter.  We worry about buying special gifts, looking the best we can, serving the best food, and saying the proper thing.  None of these things matter and yet they fill our minds with endless self-consciousness.

 

Our intention is what matters most, so if our intention is to love and be loved, we need to be presenting ourselves just as we are ... imperfect but loving and caring.  When we are directly in sync with who we are and what we truly care about, our choices will be governed by our own inclinations, not others.  We will not be striving to preform or meet impossible standards.  Let our goal or intention be as simple as holding our heart open, shinning light and love.  Those around us will remember how they felt ... loved and accepted ... more readily than what we were wearing or serving.

 

Let our words be filled with joy and appreciation.  Allow them to fill the air without judgment or expectation.  Embrace others just as they are in hopes they will return the favor.  Discern the strengths of others and offer recognition, especially with children. 

 

When it is all said and done, we will be left feeling whole even though we gave generously.  We will appreciate our personal integrity, and our ability to be truly comfortable with our lovely selves no matter where we go or what we do.

 

 

The Etch a Sketch

"As you go about your daily life, continually shake the Etch of Sketch of your mind and see things as a child would ... without expectations or recriminations."  Madiyson Taylor, DAILY OM


An Etch a Sketch was a toy quite popular years ago.  It had a red border with a silver plastic covered clear screen. Two round knobs were on the red border and when turned, they directed the lines on the gray slate.  When finished, one would just shake the toy and the design would disappear.  Then one would begin with a new design.

As we progress through this holiday season, let us again free our imagination to gently shake the 'etch of sketch' in our minds, recreating what we see.  We can attempt to move from perceiving words or actions from personalization to observation.  We can clear the slate from what originally imprinted our minds, to something fresh and new.  Yes, it can be that easy if we would only choose.

When someone speaks or acts to our displeasure, kindly remember that none of this is to be taken with direct reference towards our self.  There is no need for us to own someone else's opinion.  The words of others are authored by them and we have no responsibility for them.  Their words are a reflection of what they think or see or believe which does not belong to us unless we allow it.

Imagination is a freeing tool.  We can magically release what we first see, and change the lens to look again.  Think of it as a magic trick.  What we see often times is simply an illusion ... like the coin being taken from our ear. 

Place our energy into compassion to others, not into defending ourselves.  Understand how challenged this other person must be to speak such angry words or do misdeeds.  When we remember it has nothing to do with us, not really, we can disregard falsehoods sent our way.

Beautiful You!

 

 

 

My heart extends love, energy and light.

I am grateful for who you are

and thankful for moments we have shared.

 

May this season

fill your heart with love and anticipation

for safe journeys

into this forth coming year.

 

Filled with Divine joy and hope

may you feel and embrace

the sacred as it is woven

into your life.

 

Thank you for being beautiful you!

 

Virginia Carlson

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Permission Granted

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"It isn't kind to your children to let your needs build up

until you explode.  If you need a break, take one.

If you need a big break, take one.  The harm is not

in taking breaks but in thinking we must get angry or turn against

our kids in some other way to justify the break."

 

Hugh Prather

Spiritual Notes to Myself

 

 

 

When children are little, they push and push against our tolerance until we send everyone to their rooms.  Teens act out extending our patience until it is thin.  In both situations, the one doing the pushing and the one being pushed  are really needing attention or recognition or the comfort of tender care.

 

It was always amazing to me how tolerant and patient I would try to be as a  mother, but disappointing myself by retaliating against anyone near me.  Everyone would scamper off and silence would surround me.  I remember wondering why I had not done this an hour earlier before I lost my temper.

 

We somehow believe that enduring the rudeness or inconsideration of others will win us some sort of badge or patch like in the scouts.  We tell ourselves that we are spiritual beings forgetting that we are also human. 

 

Some of us don't even know what our needs are so how can we ask for them to be met while others don't feel worthy to have any goodness placed at their feet.  We must learn to not see needing a break as a weakness.  It is a form of nurturing, healing and restoring.

 

So rather than be a martyr of motherhood, or a grumpy mate, I hear by grant you permission for taking a break for as long as needed.  If we treat ourselves as we would treat our best friend, we may just grow into being the best friend ever ... to ourselves!

Chase the Darkness Away

 

 

 

 

As a mother would risk her life
to protect her child, her only child,
even so should one cultivate a limitless heart
with regard to all beings.
With good will for the entire cosmos,
cultivate a limitless heart:
Above, below, & all around,
unobstructed, without hostility or hate.
Whether standing, walking,
sitting, or lying down,
as long as one is alert,
one should be resolved on this mindfulness.
This is called a sublime abiding
here & now.

Buddha
 Karaniya Metta Sutta

 

 

 

This morning the sun is shinning for which I am grateful, but winter sits heavily in my heart.  Cuddled in my chair with  an inspirational book, lighted candle and steaming coffee, I find myself adrift. 

 

In perfect solitude I detect an unseen resistance that seems to have no bearing upon anything.  There is no head nor tail, and no discovery of any haunting beast.   My journal remains blank in front of my eyes and there doesn't seem to be one particular thought in my head.  Quite simply, I am stuck.

 

Lacking any sense of focus to read, and not having any words to write, I begin to send light  into the world.  I first think of my children and their families followed by dear sisters of my heart.  As my energy grows stronger, I send love to those who have anger, loss, and fright.  Let each and every person feel a  burst of  light warming their soul.   Spirit will offer each a glimpse of hope from their plight. 

 

Light is spread to all peoples serving communities, placing themselves in harms way to bring safety to someone else.  I imagine love held dissolving separateness, hatred, and fear for those who are imprisoned physically or mentally or spiritually.  The light grows embracing all of nature and everything unknown. 

 

I am free to move again as my  earlier sense of resistance is now long gone.  I feel connected to life and the necessity to use each moment more purposefully than sitting idle in my chair. Sending light or prayer or love which ever word one chooses, rids the body of the heaviness or loneliness or void one sometimes feels.  I discover that in giving to others, we stoke the fire so ignited flames can chase the darkness away.

 

 

 

 

 

Life Unfolding

 

 

girl to girl

Ganna Walska in LOTTUSLAND

 

 

 

"A new view of a situation

is just what we need

to answer a difficult question or

see something we've been missing."

 

Madisyn Taylor

DAILY OM

 

 

 

Whether intentional or not, we have a tendency to bias our answers before we ask the question.  If we want to discuss religion, we confer with our religious friend.  If we want to talk about an affair, we have a private conversation with someone we know who has had an affair.  If we are seeking answers to parenting, we chat with friends who have children.  In this way, we have narrowed the field of response.

 

It is in our best interest to broaden the scope of resolution.  There is greater risk in presenting our question to someone we do not normally associate with the subject, but we may be surprised by new information causing a greater shift from our previous perspective.

 

As human beings, our feelings are hurt when we learn of someone's deception.  Rarely, however, do we monitor our personal feelings when we deceive our selves.  When we knowingly turn our head from what our mind is thinking, our voice is saying or our hands are doing, we are causing great damage to ourselves. 

 

So let us be gently reminded of the practice of sitting on our own shoulder, watching and observing our thoughts and actions closely.  Pause before responding.  In that instant check in with self and see if we are being a robot automatically responding or if we are answering with our authentic voice. 

 

If we feel we do not have the right answer, then begin the search for what is missing.  If the situation or conversation does not feel whole, then look for what is hidden.  The key is always to alter our steps, to be willing to embrace change, and to appreciate life unfolding.

Sharron Magyar's Book Signing!

MY GOLDEN HEART

Putting The Pieces Back Together Again

by author, Sharon Magyar


Michaleen McDonald, Editor
Virginia Carlson, Writers Group
Sharron Magyar, Author and Writers Group
Nancy Long, Writers Group

Admiration, praise and heartfelt joy goes out to Sharron Magyar for publishing her book, MY GOLDEN HEART, Putting The Pieces Back Together.  She shares a true intriguing story and offers encouraging methods to transform shattered hearts back into full living.

Applause!  The Writers Group, (fondly known as The Book Whores), family and friends are so very proud of Sharron and we will eagerly follow the next forthcoming project!

Sentence and Metaphor

 

"No" is a complete sentence.

― Anne Lamott

 

 

 

The house, porch, yard, and fence create a wonderful metaphor.   Think of the  self as the house and visualize the porch, yard, and fence as the community.  There are some folks who walk up and down the sidewalk who we do not speak to at all.  Then there are people we choose to chat with over the fence, but we do not give them entry into the yard.  We may open the gate to still a smaller group of people, allowing them into our yard for a friendly gathering.  There are fewer still we invite to sit on our porch swing sharing stories.  Then there may be just a handful we might actually welcome inside to authentically experience us.  And even then, we may entertain some socially in the living room, others for coffee in the kitchen, and just one or two to step into our private space.

 

This metaphor gives us a picture of how we can maintain healthy boundaries.  We can easily be caught up in the rush of the season and make choices that are really not heartfelt.  When we are faced with social obligations, run the event through the metaphor deciding on the appropriate place these people can be appropriately. 

 

We get to choose what is best for us.  We get to make decisions that are in our best interest.  When we do not, we pay a price.  Keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with replying "no".   We sometimes forget that yes and no are equal responses.  One is not better (good girl)and the other lesser than (bad girl).

 

We may want to practice saying "no" so we can use it as a simple response without a lengthy dialogue following.  We do not need a story to back up our decision.  As Anne Lamott states:  "No is a complete sentence."

Limitations Life Leaves Behind

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
July 1926 - August 2004


Upon meeting a kindred spirit, it is always intriguing to hear how their personal life challenges made them who they are today.  These delightful individuals do not present as the 'wounded' , but as a work in progress.  They are striving  to learn from situations, and to over come the limitations life left behind.  They are strong and determined while at the same time vulnerable and willing to embrace the unknown.

There are those who amaze me in their ability to take life in stride without bitterness or sense of 'why me'.  They do not battle their way, but almost gently move through what appears before them remaining balanced and whole.  I admire these people greatly.

We can revert back to childhood remembering the red inked stamp of "Do Over" even though we were certain we had done our best.  There are days we feel like we have tried so hard and yet missed the mark.  Perhaps the point is we should not try so hard.  Maybe if we can stay balanced and pull creativity into the mix, we can discover adequate solutions without selling our souls.  This of course would require practice, flexibility, and willingness to change.

The people living an authentic life have challenges just as we do.  The difference is their focus.  They do not perceive everything as being a personal attack.  They focus on how best they can adapt to what life has presented.  They do not forget that they are entering a learning situation, and readily apply information they have learned from the past or leave themselves open to discover insight.

There is a difference between 'knowing' and 'understanding'.  Information needs to be applied, digested, inhaled, and remembered.  Being in the presence of understanding, makes knowledge come alive.


***Elisabeth Kubler-Ross was a Swiss American Psychiatrist who brought attention to the five stages of grieving and near death experiences in her excellent book entitled, "ON DEATH AND DYING".  Her research brought comfort and new insight into the transition of death for those crossing over and for those left behind. 

Humility Conquers Ego

 

 

 



Our personal breakthroughs teach us how to see present challenges or difficulties in a new light as we learn to acknowledge the opportunities we are given to stretch beyond our former limitations.  Our understanding of how we operate in the world is increased as we gather more of our awareness and balanced self-esteem into present time, using those gifts to discover harmony and wholeness. New points of balance are achieved as we heal and refine our lives.

Jamie Sams
DANCING THE DREAM


If we are paying attention, we will find ourselves throughout life cycling in and out of learning opportunities.  Some lessons are revisited so many times, we almost laugh and say, "Not again!" It is no wonder that a spiral is one of life's many symbols. 

With each accomplished lesson, we have healed a small part of ourselves.  Maybe even a little corner of pain we did not fully realize was there.  With each completion, we are altered to a certain degree.  New growth triggers a shedding of the old.

As we grow more confident and aware of these opportunities requiring us to shift gears, we are also more flexible in our thinking.  We can piece together was is unfolding and with discernment, choose wisely to enhance our spirit. 

With these patterns of growth, our compassion grows towards both ourselves as well as to others.  In recreating our intentions as we travel through challenges, humility conquers ego. 
"I" morphs into "we" and "my" becomes "our".  We easily come to see not our individual face in a mirror, but the mirror becomes a window opening  out into the world seen as one.

Quote .. walk light INC

During the Holidays

 

“I've spent most of my life and most of my friendships holding my breath and hoping that when people get close enough they won't leave, and fearing that it's a matter of time before they figure me out and go.”

Shauna Niequist
Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way


The month of December can trigger all kinds of problems for us if we do not maintain healthy boundaries.  It is a season to please others at the expense of ourselves, so we must be mindful of our emotions and limitations.

Social gatherings can be a huge hurdle.  We wonder if we will know anyone else attending, we feel uncomfortable in our dress up clothes, and we long to return to the sanctuary of our home.  If we are truly in sync with our inner self, we will be able to discern what level of fear we are experiencing.   We have a moment in the 'adult chair' and explore our options.  We can make a quick appearance as to not offend the host or we can simply turn to home.  We can give ourselves permission to preview our invitations and decline before we are placed in an anxious position. 

This season also brings an awareness to some if they are not invited to anything.  We can feel either relief or isolation.  There are two things to be considered here:  1.  Are we alone by design or 2.  Do we need to be more socialized.    Whatever the truth is in our heart, it will help us to react in appropriate ways. 

We can excuse ourselves from social gatherings we have no connection to, but we can also endeavor to create some form of activity that would be a new tradition.  If we enjoy our home, we can invite just a few people over for a brief period of time.  If we don't cook, we can ask each person to bring their favorite deli choice.  If we are not comfortable with people in our home, invite a few friends to meet at a small restaurant or museum or place of interest. 

We need to acknowledge how we feel in order to meet our needs.  If we are constantly dreading an invasion of people or feeling obligated to purchase unrealistic gits, then we need to be more honest with ourselves.  Eliminate, gracefully, the situations that no longer enhance the spirit of the season.  Introduce new traditions that will help maintain the reverence of our relationship with others.

When we love and respect ourselves, when we are aligned with body, mind, and spirit, and when we support healthy boundaries, our true self emerges.  We can step through the fear of disapproval, and respect our true self by taking more meaningful actions and by using our time to build us up, not take us down.

Listen for the Stillness

 

 

 

"The longer I wake on this earth,

the louder the quiet things speak to me.

The more I experience and survive,

the more I find truth in the commonalities we all share.

The more pain softens me,

the deeper my joy,

and the greater the lessons of those things

that live in great stillness."

 

Mark Nepo

THE BOOK OF AWAKENING

 

 

A Christmas tree decorated with small white lights can be mesmerizing.  The miniature lights in the midst of the dark green tree are like small glowing candles.  Starting the fireplace, grabbing a quilt and a journal, a person can escape for hours once settled upon the couch.

 

The frenzy of Christmas encourages me to withdraw instead of increase my momentum.  I want to gently fall back and just enjoy the simple things rather than  the noisy rush.  The larger gatherings of people only make me wish to be in the silence and presence of the Christmas tree of my home.

 

It is said that as we grow older, we appreciate the smaller things, the more simple things, and the stillness more.  I find this to be true, but it constantly reflects the solitude and appreciation I felt as a child.  This quietness speaks to me, comforts me, and reflects upon a time I once knew loneliness far too well. 

 

One becomes a brave little soldier sensing that the world will be faced alone.  During those years of battle, all is broken by the pain.  Healing back into a full life, there is a stronger connection with all that is and the need to embrace everything as it appears ... fear, pain, loneliness, joy, gratitude.  It is realized that it is not in bravery, but in embracing the world.  By welcoming life to pass through us, clinging not to the pain nor the joy, life continues on. 

 

In the stillness of the moment, sitting before the lighted green tree, life is calm and peaceful.  I breathe it in deeply with all of my senses, storing it all in anticipation of winter.  Hibernation is not so very far away. 

 

 



Reflection of Kindness and Progress

 

 

 

The Magic Grammar (c.1900).

Jessie Marion King (Scottish, 1875-1949).

King was an illustrator mostly of children’s books.

King was made Tutor in Book Decoration and Design

at Glasgow School of Art in 1899.

 

 

 

Many women have been warriors.  Warriors in the sense that they have stood up for what they believe and have defended their stance without the use of physical force.  The power they have wielded has come from an inner strength both spiritual and emotional even though  a toll  can be taken on the physical.

 

Women have battled for politics, religion, medicine, employment/career, and protection for nature, animals, and the feminine.  This has been accomplished by mass scale as well as small groups and community actions.  Whether through protests, petitions, or mindful action, women have awakened the feminine spirit in themselves as well as in others. When a woman has learned to live with a balance between her masculine and feminine energies, she can truly be a force. 

 

A friend of mine is very outspoken.  Her direct manner can sometimes appear as abrasive, but that is truly not her intent.  This aggressive masculine side of her is well balanced through her artistic feminine expression in dance.  I have watched her essence entirely shift as her feet are poised on the floor and her arms begin to artistically flow.  It is as though a magical trance gently falls upon her.

 

Another dear friend of mine appears to be more feminine than the average.  In her dress, manners, and speech, she projects an image of a dainty soul.  With her feminine energy well established, her masculine energy is enhanced through exercise at the gym and lifting weights.  She is one of the strongest women I happen to know.

 

Still another beautiful soul in my life, has the presence of an unmistakable and unseen force.  Immediately, one becomes aware of how she is both grounded and wise in a very physical way.  On the other hand, she feels the slightest ripple of emotion in a very delicate way.  Her masculine and feminine need to remain blended to sustain the duality.

 

If my observation is still unclear, I will put it in these terms.  Early on, one of my most favorite sayings was, "The pen is mightier than the sword."  I believe there is real power in our words and embracing diverse opinions rather than physically dominating and oppressing.  When we remain balanced between masculine (verbally assertive) and feminine (creative and diverse) we can look into any mirror and see an acceptable reflection of kindness and progress.

 

We each have a masculine and feminine side.  We can display these energies in a vast array of ways.  It is when we master the ability to be comfortable with both masculine and feminine energy that we are totally authentic and whole.  It is a matter of self-discovery and development of the body, mind, and soul.

 

 

 

 

 





Sleepless

 

 

The night walked down the sky with the moon in her hand. ~

Frederick L. Knowles



 

 

During the holiday season, we long to fall into bed, into a deep escape of peaceful rest.  When we finally are able to stumble to bed, either overstimulated or exhausted, our eyes may close, but sleep keeps its distance. 

 

There are many suggestions:  do not have a TV on in your room; do not exercise prior to retiring; and if you don't fall asleep within 15 minutes get back up and try again later.  We all have heard numerous solutions  and consequence to this problem.  If we do not sleep, we become irritable, more prone to depression or illness, and certainly have less focus.

 

Here are a few things that might help prior to bed time:

a.  Jot down a list of things of what you accomplished or happened that day.

b.  Make a list of things you intend to get done tomorrow.

c.  Take a nice long bath with bubbles to lighten the mood or Epsom salts to relax the muscles. d.  Burn a candle and listen to some soothing music.

e.  Take a shower with a favorite shower gel gently washing away the hardest parts of the day.

f.   Read a favorite poem, affirmation, or passage from a prayer book.

g.  Keep a grateful journal and write down at least 10 things to be grateful about.

h.  Gently stretch your body with yoga using either corpse pose or child's pose.

 

Things to  do at bed time:

a.  Take three long breaths: breathe in, pause.  Breathe out pause.

b.  Focus on the toes relaxing, ankles, calves, knees, thighs, working up to the top of the head.

c.  While breathing slowly, and relaxing the body, create a peaceful scene in your mind.

d.  Recite positive affirmations:  I will sleep soundly.  Thank you for a good night's sleep. 

e.  Place an eye cover over your eyes to indicate to the body it is time to shut down.

 

If awakened in the night:

a.  Repeat earlier breathing practice

b.  Repeat relaxing the body from toe to head.

c.  Change sleeping location. (Sometimes we can go right back to sleep just by relocating.)

e.  Create peaceful visualizations or dreams in your imagination.

 

Random thoughts:

We might want to check  our thermostats.  Is the room too cold or too hot?  Try to sleep in different pajamas.  Consider bedtime by questioning if we are going to bed too early or too late.  If we go too early, we are not ready for sleep and we begin tossing and turning before we even enter sleep mode.  If we got to bed too late, we are overly tired and falling asleep is even more difficult.  

 

What frequently happens is we keep our days accelerating at fast paces.  We push thoughts out of our minds and then when we finally become still in bed, our mind fills with busy thoughts earlier repressed.  Every one of us can benefit from down time or alone time in addition to our bedtime.  We need an arena where we can place our worries or concerns which eliminates them as bed partners.  If we have relationship problems, confronting a partner at bed time is about the worst idea one can have. 

 

If sleep simply doesn't arrive, just try to rest calmly.  If that doesn't work, then get up, do not turn on the TV, but do something creative like sketching, needlework, journal, or a relaxing activity that will allow relaxation by distraction. 

 

We all deserve and need a good night's rest.  Give your lovely self permission  to sleep deeply, safely, and comfortably.  If you can, place your self in the care of the Divine. Gently call angels or masters to be by your side.   Be nice to you!