Good Day to Die ...

 

Your visions will become clear

only when you can look

into your own heart.

Who looks outside, dreams;

who looks inside, awakes.

C. G. Jung

Today is one of those good days, where I can find no fault with my self.  I feel whole, connected, and loved.  It is not often the stars align for me, so I glory in this day.  It is good to be me, and I am  grateful for my life, my teachers and lessons.  As the Native American Indians would say, "Today is a good day to die."

Years ago, I did not understand this concept of death.  Surely, it would not be a good day if I were physically dying.  Now, however, I have a greater sense of what is meant by this phrase.

There are just some days life is so perfect and fulfilling one feels that it will never be better than this moment in time.  If this time in space is the peak of all things, why go on?  Let go when everything is beautiful, peace, and calm. 

On this day I have no longings or yearnings to unbalance my day.  I am more than content with all of the blessings I have received.  I desire to enjoy each and every moment as this mystical sense of oneness will surely pass in short time.  My human ego will soon over ride my spiritual awareness, ushering me back into the chaos of real time.

This is My Day

The spiritual teacher

only points the way;

we must do

our own traveling.

Buddha

Most every day, I walk 3 to 4 miles.  It would be impressive to say I do it for the exercise, but that would be an untruth.  I walk to be connected to nature and to feel the energy from all that surrounds me.  The vibrancy of flowers enriches my spirit and the swaying of the beautiful trees empowers me. 

This particular morning it is raining and very humid.  The humidity feels oppressive like it is weighing me down.  I feel almost claustrophobic.  I retreat from the porch with my coffee and try to settle in with a daily inspiration.

The daily inspiration explains to me that I will always have friends, guides, and loved ones, but I must not expect to be rescued by anyone.  Although this is not new news to me, I some how allow it to make me feel lonely. 

I next turn to incoming e-mail and find myself directed to a video explaining awareness and how we must stand back and be a witness to our physical life.   As an observer, we notice a distance or a separation between our spiritual self and our physical self.  This, too, I know, but on this rainy morning, I am not looking to highlight my separatness. 

On my second cup of coffee pondering what I have learned (no one is coming to rescue me and I am separate), I find my self wondering if it is too late to crawl back into bed.  This might have been a consideration had I not already neatly made the bed a few hours ago. 

Picking up my journal, I find my self expressing resistance, avoidance, and some levels of resentment.  As I write, I am hoping that whatever it is that is bothering me will jump right out of my pen.  And in some ways, this happens.

Buddha says, "We must do our own traveling," and I know this in my heart to be true.  No one can make this journey for me.  It is a hands on, experiential assignment that I have some how signed up for and I know I will see it through.

This is my day and I can make of it whatever I want.  I get to choose to be lonely or to shift into a different perception that will bring peace and contentment.  Hmmm ... which will I choose?

I loved to swim ...

With the gift of listening

comes the gift of healing.

Catherine de Hueck

We can learn a lot about our selves when we pay attention to the words we use and the facts we share.  We may even surprise our selves by what unexpectedly comes out. 

Many years ago, while attending a meeting, I was seated by a gentleman I did not know.  He asked me about myself and what I most liked to do.  I immediately responded, "Oh, I love to swim!"  Then I sat with those words for a long time.

As a youngster, I loved the water and I became a life guard when I was a young adult.  I grew up on Lake Michigan, but also had access to a pool on a regular basis.  In college I was a good strong swimmer, but lacked style and grace.   So, yes, I loved to swim ... past tense.

Facing this unknown gentleman, he immediately picked up on the pensive look on my face.  Being a good listener, he encouraged me to explain.  As we often bare our souls to total strangers, I proceeded to tell him I had just realized how disconnected I apparently was with my self.  Yes, I had loved to swim, but had not been in a bathing suit for years.  The very thought of being in a bathing suit gave me the willies!

Sorting out my feelings while I talked, I soon realized that it was the water I always loved and still loved.  It doesn't matter if it is an ocean, lake, pond, stream or bath tub, I am calmed just by being by the water.  The water some how relaxes and comforts me.  It is also cleansing.

After my meeting and the nice man departed, I continued to ponder his original question, "What do I like to do?"  This innocent question sent me on a quest to rediscover myself and to determine what no longer suited me.  What did I want to bring more of into my life?  There was so much to choose from:  painting, writing, reading, and collecting antique dishes, spoons, boxes, napkins, etc ...

Eventually, I updated the activities in my life and found more creative ways to express who I was.  I began listening to others about their own passions and what how these interests played out in their lives.  I listened more attentively to community announcements finding classes and workshops to expand my skills.

So the art of listening works both ways.  We must first listen to our inner voice to really connect with our heart's desire.  It helps to monitor our own conversations for authentic reflection.  Then as we listen to others we can enhance our understanding and skill.  We can creatively act upon our dreams and desires, but if we don't first listen, how will we ever know?

Rainmaker by Clarissa Pinkola Estes

RAINMAKER: YOU COULD BE THE WATER ...

By the scent of water alone,

the withered vine comes back to life,

and thus ... wherever the land is dry and hard,

you could be the water;

or you could be the iron blade

disking the earth open;

or you could be the 'acequia',

the mother ditch, carrying the water

from the river to the fields

to grow the flowers for the farmers;

or you could be the honest engineer

mapping the dams that must be taken down,

and those dams which could remain to serve

the venerable all, instead of only the very few.

You could be the battered vessel

for carrying the water by hand;

or you could be the one

who stores the water.

You could be the one who

protects the water,

or the one who blesses it,

or the one who pours it.

Or you could be the tired ground

that receives it;

or you could be the scorched seed

that drinks it;

or you could be the vine,

green-growing overland,

in all your wild audacity ...

Untie the Strong Woman

Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD

It is important for each one of us to discover the role we play in the greater scheme of things.  We must identify our strengths and use them accordingly.  There is no role too small or insignificant as we all form the whole together.