This is My Day

The spiritual teacher

only points the way;

we must do

our own traveling.

Buddha

Most every day, I walk 3 to 4 miles.  It would be impressive to say I do it for the exercise, but that would be an untruth.  I walk to be connected to nature and to feel the energy from all that surrounds me.  The vibrancy of flowers enriches my spirit and the swaying of the beautiful trees empowers me. 

This particular morning it is raining and very humid.  The humidity feels oppressive like it is weighing me down.  I feel almost claustrophobic.  I retreat from the porch with my coffee and try to settle in with a daily inspiration.

The daily inspiration explains to me that I will always have friends, guides, and loved ones, but I must not expect to be rescued by anyone.  Although this is not new news to me, I some how allow it to make me feel lonely. 

I next turn to incoming e-mail and find myself directed to a video explaining awareness and how we must stand back and be a witness to our physical life.   As an observer, we notice a distance or a separation between our spiritual self and our physical self.  This, too, I know, but on this rainy morning, I am not looking to highlight my separatness. 

On my second cup of coffee pondering what I have learned (no one is coming to rescue me and I am separate), I find my self wondering if it is too late to crawl back into bed.  This might have been a consideration had I not already neatly made the bed a few hours ago. 

Picking up my journal, I find my self expressing resistance, avoidance, and some levels of resentment.  As I write, I am hoping that whatever it is that is bothering me will jump right out of my pen.  And in some ways, this happens.

Buddha says, "We must do our own traveling," and I know this in my heart to be true.  No one can make this journey for me.  It is a hands on, experiential assignment that I have some how signed up for and I know I will see it through.

This is my day and I can make of it whatever I want.  I get to choose to be lonely or to shift into a different perception that will bring peace and contentment.  Hmmm ... which will I choose?