Priority

"No one can make up for the deprivation you experienced,

and no one should be expected to."

Beverly Engel

It is advantageous to make strong connections with those who surround us, as it is through communication bonds are strengthened. The fallacy is expecting the other person to fill in our gaps of uncertainty, rather than determining what we genuinely need. While searching outside of the self, we consistently dodge the disruption within. 

Contributing to the strains in relationship is the reluctance to give voice to what we need. We frequently feel unworthy to make requests no matter how badly we yearn for fulfillment. Perhaps we feel too needy to ask when friends are already occupied with their own challenges. We lavish compassion on others, but minimize it for our personal need.

It is when we can label our own needs, and determine appropriate ways of meeting them that we trigger healthy change. Indulge the self by taking pause to allow whatever is buried to surface. Maintain confidence in being capable of embracing emotions. When we are gentle with ourselves, healing begins. Meeting our own needs becomes a priority.