Magic or Horror

"A painting is more than the sum of its parts, he would tell me, 

and then go on to explain 

how the cow by itself is just a cow,

and the meadow by itself is just grass and flowers,

and the sun peeking through the trees is just a beam of light,

but put them all together and you've got magic."

Wendelin Van Draanen

FLIPPED

To look at a hand that is soiled by various colors of wet paint, may not have much attraction for us.  When the hand belongs to a young child, and we enlarge our view to find a beaming face of accomplishment, we begin to adjust our opinion.  When the youngster, with rapid speed, tells the story behind her efforts,  we grow more endeared.  It is when we gather all parts of the experience together, the nugget of the story churns itself into the telling of a true tale.

Years ago, I provided in home counseling.  I  was required to record the social history of  the family.  When I entered the home for the interview, I only knew one thing about them, and it was either extremely questionable or negative. I would have already read an entire case file compiled by an investigator.   I was often greeted by hostility and quickly learned to not focus about the incident bringing me into the home.  "Tell me about yourself.  Share some family stories with me."  I would attempt to inject my one piece of information into a larger picture.  There would be no magic, but often times horror stories.

This process would not change facts, but it would give me some understanding of how truthful a person was and how their perspective was formed.  By listening to a family's history, it was easier to determine if the reason I was there was for an isolated incident or if there had been a history riddled with this problem.  If I were to assist, I needed to begin with their perspective of things and work from there.  A long process.

If I were scanning through your life history and randomly chose just one thing to represent an entire life, wouldn't you be concerned?  Just one random thing, not the highlight or even the lowest point, but a random choice.  Would you want that one piece to represent your entire life?  Instantly, you would want to fill me in, to tell the story, to make the random choosing more pertinent or less important to the entire telling.

Maybe when we just hear one piece of the whole, it is easier to judge.  When we fit together several aspects forming a greater base of information, compassion can grow.  Resolve can be more accurate  or support more appropriate.  We begin to embrace the entire picture, initiating better understanding rather than separation and destruction.