Tell Tale Information

"I need to listen well so that I hear what is not said."

Thuli Madonsela

Role modeling myself after my father who was a detective in Chicago. I wanted to please him so I would observe and gather information in case he might ask me. If a man or woman came to the house in his absence, he would ask me numerous questions: How tall, what they were wearing, color of hair, jewelry or glasses, friendly or suspicious, and how did they leave? I positively loved being able to respond to my father with detailed reports.  

So I searched even deeper in the presence of others ... listening to what was not being said. My observations stretched into taking note of the surroundings: Was someone else waiting, what kind of car they drove, or if they seemed anxious or 'casing' our neighborhood.

These skills allowed me to be a very annoying parent. I could discern what was not being said,read body language and be all the wiser when stories didn't line up. Years later these same skills were blessings while working in social services. Point being, do not be calculating a response instead of being present to notice tell tale information surrounding the situation.