Instead of avoiding our fears and frustrations or beating our heads against them in anger as we lash out at ourselves, others, and the world, we are able to pass through them and become larger, more inclusive, and more compassionate people.
Norman Fischer
ALL THE RAGE
We tell our lovely selves we are taking the 'higher road' by overlooking the misconduct of others, but at what cost to our selves? It is important to not judge, but it is equally important to deal with our fears as they arise. There is not need to lash out at another person for their insensitive ways, if we learn to channel our feelings in appropriate ways.
We can strive for responding rather than reacting. If someone shouts hateful words at us, we can react by shouting back or we can respond placing the intensity back on the owner. When we react, we habitually say things we wish we had not said. If we calmly choose our response, we will not be sucked into the drama of others.
"Sounds like you are having a bad day," can be chosen or "You really sound angry, what is going on?"
We don't have to 'tolerate' attacks of others, but the energy must go somewhere. So the choice is to respond from a balanced attitude and leave the angst with the owner.
If we remain silent and absorb negative energy, then we need to artfully pass it on. We can do this through singing, exercising, writing, or other ventures such as: seeking solitude, praying for the people involved, or forgiving the displayed anger. By using one of these opportunities, we can move emotions outside of our selves.
No one can make us feel a particular emotion, unless we allow it. We decide how much energy can be placed into a situation, so we indeed have some limited control. Don't be a retainer for others anger. Move it on out!
We tell our lovely selves we are taking the 'higher road' by overlooking the misconduct of others, but at what cost to our selves? It is important to not judge, but it is equally important to deal with our fears as they arise. There is not need to lash out at another person for their insensitive ways, if we learn to channel our feelings in appropriate ways.
We can strive for responding rather than reacting. If someone shouts hateful words at us, we can react by shouting back or we can respond placing the intensity back on the owner. When we react, we habitually say things we wish we had not said. If we calmly choose our response, we will not be sucked into the drama of others.
"Sounds like you are having a bad day," can be chosen or "You really sound angry, what is going on?"
We don't have to 'tolerate' attacks of others, but the energy must go somewhere. So the choice is to respond from a balanced attitude and leave the angst with the owner.
If we remain silent and absorb negative energy, then we need to artfully pass it on. We can do this through singing, exercising, writing, or other ventures such as: seeking solitude, praying for the people involved, or forgiving the displayed anger. By using one of these opportunities, we can move emotions outside of our selves.
No one can make us feel a particular emotion, unless we allow it. We decide how much energy can be placed into a situation, so we indeed have some limited control. Don't be a retainer for others anger. Move it on out!
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