Friday, January 6, 2012

A Positive Message



Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of a parent gives the child some message about self-worth. It is sad that so many parents don't realize what messages they are sending.   ~Virginia Satir


Everyone is entitled to think what they want, but unfortunately, we sometimes base our thinking on the behaviors of people we love.  If mom says I am not living up to her expectations or dad simply shakes his head disapprovingly, their assessment must be true ... I trust her, I love him, they know me better than I know my self.  We internalize the judgment and criticism.

We need to realize others project things upon us, but the projection is really more about them ... their own fears ... their own agendas.  We are all concerned about being loved and accepted.  If something harsh is said to us, let it be a signal that the person is really needing to feel more secure or loved.  Let there be a pause, and then find some way ... maybe just an unexpected hug, a special note or flowers ... to reassure the person.  In reality, the person is probably already hating himself or herself for speaking to you in such an inappropriate way. 
We must learn to build our lives in ways that support our growth.  Our own behaviors towards our inner growth must be nurturing and affirming.  If we were not chosen to sing in a choir or chorus, it does not mean that we cannot sing.  SING!  It is good for us  to hear our own voice making joyful noises or settling us into calm.  DANCE! Moving our feet is not only good exercise, but a liberation of spirit as well.  PAINT!  We don't have to be an artist to make strokes with a brush.  Fall in love with mixing colors.  WRITE!  Be creative using a private journal.  Jot down notes or quotes.  Cut out pictures and make mini collages or simply sketch.  Find a way for creative expression and it will lead us into our true nature.
We must try to be nice to our inner self as it will help to reprogram earlier negative messages from those we loved.   We willingly do things for others, but not so much ourselves.  We tend to censor kind gestures towards ourselves ... thinking it is too selfish and our ego talks us out of it.  We must be vigilant in giving our self permission to respect, honor, and nurture our very life.

Please do not hide your beautiful self.  The world needs your bright and shining light!  Be a positive message to our world.  We need you just as you are!




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