Reaching Out

"It may be that the ability to know the necessity for help; to know how to look for that help

and then most importantly, how to ask for it, is one of the primary transformative dynamics

that allow us to emancipate ourselves into each new epoch of our lives."

David Whyte

CONSOLATIONS

There is sadness in the fact we tend to minimize our difficulties and allow thoughts of shame to bind us.  We neglect to remember every human being experiencing life in this moment is also struggles with challenges.  What we hide from others is often clearly demonstrated in our mannerisms, attitudes, and choices. 

Do we choose a confidant we see every day or will that in time feel like pressure?  There may be a person of respect or a mentor who would listen without judgment.  Professional help may be well worth the investment.  The importance is to make a decision and follow through.

Either secure an appointment, invite an elder to coffee, or engage a friend to walk.  In this way, the intention of being together is deliberate.  Although it may seem awkward at first, once we delve into the subject, the situation becomes easier.  If we have chosen a compassionate witness, we will feel the binds of shame lessen.  We will begin to feel the tension and stress slowly slip away.  Be clear with them as to what  is needed. Assure the other person to either just listen, to engage in a constructive discussion, or share insights.  Guidelines are important and we need to set our boundaries.

We don't always want someone to solve our dilemma.   What someone else has experienced emotionally or physically in the exact same situation will not necessarily be equalled to our own.  We are unique and react differently.  The act of reaching out is a healthy step leading to further disclosure and eventual resolution to our problem.