"Your instincts may tell you that you can't survive if you experience feelings. But
they are leftover child instincts. They're the ones that first told you to freeze your
feelings. They themselves are frozen and haven't grown with the rest of you. These
instincts don't know that you're far more capable of learning to cope with over whelming
emotion now than when you were a child."
Maureen Brady
As a child, we experience difficult trauma, but do not yet have the coping skills or the ability to base the situation on past experiences. There are numerous ways to respond or not respond to harsh events in our little lives.
My personal favorite was to freeze in place when suddenly approached by fear. I never remember feeling cold, but I felt as though the imagined ice would hold be perfectly still and perhaps even make me transparent. If I had the sense that danger was coming, I would run away; except the running was done in my head as my feet were emotionally glued to the ground.. The faster I ran the louder the tap of my shoes and the threat falsely seemed to shrink.
When we explore dysfunction in children and truly listen without any reaction, they will share some outstanding stories. Disassociation is highly interesting. A child if in church will disappear into the stained glass or the statue of the Blessed Mother. If outside there are endless places such as the moon, stars, clouds or even airplanes flying high. Sad but true, when inside the child's home, he or she will have an object that is repeatedly used for escape. Detangling emotions do not necessarily resolve the habit of our knee jerk reactions.
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