Residuals of Suicide

"But in the end one need more courage

to live than to kill himself."

Albert Camus

I can understand wanting to end life in the darkness of winter, but the spring is so full of new life, I would think one would be encouraged to let things unfold.  Recently, I have had two conversations regarding a current loss of life by suicide.  Death in itself, whether accident or illness is difficult to embrace, but there is the choice in suicide that sets those of us left behind on edge.

A loved one can spend 24/7 with a potential suicide victim, but with the smallest of pauses, if he or she has the plan and the desire, he or she will follow through.  The friends or loved ones left behind will be plagued with thoughts of 'if'  they were not more alert or 'if'  they could have prevented it ....

Living, indeed, takes courage and strength.  Our minds can become so isolated the lack of touch, connection, and purpose quickly fades.  The pain in desperation and the overwhelming fear of the future drains the courage to move forward.  I do not sit in judgment, and I strive to be present for those who are in shock as they are abruptly left behind.