Painful Day of the Year

"Mother's Day can be one of the

most emotionally painful 

days of the year."

Virginia Carlson

Keeping perspective can be challenging when we are bombarded by expectations for Mother's Day that are simply impossible and unrealistic for many women.   There are those who yearn to have children, but cannot conceive; there are those who conceive, but cannot provide; and there are children who have been taken by disease or miscarriage.  There are mothers who are separated from their children due to geographical locations or monetary conflict, or family dysfunction.

Words in our view about mothers are: strong, loving, devoted, inspiring, self-sacrificing, encouraging,  and nurturing.  How do these words impact the orphaned, abused, or misplaced adult child?  There are those who successfully turn their focus to celebrating their own motherhood and dismissing history with the family of origin.  Even as they celebrate success with their own children there is still angst in being saturated by the media.

Forgiveness comes into play as well as healing.  In processing our past, it is easier to move through the unrealistic expectations, but the over kill of the supermom gets under the skin.   It is my belief that the imposed image of a supermom does harm to the very naturalistic responses children crave.  I have this strong urge to comfort those who will be hurting in memory of their losses or of never receiving gain.  I would prefer to honor all women who generously mother children of the world.