Kahlil Gibran (Lebanese poet and philosopher): "My friend, I am not what I seem. Seeming is but a garment I wear - a care-woven garment that protects me from the questionings and thee from my negligence. The 'I' in me, my friend, dwells in the house of silence, and therein it shall remain for ever more, unperceived, unapproachable."
We want to see our friends and family happy, so it is easy to buy into their projection of 'everything is right in my world'. Do we sincerely listen to the answer of the question or do we directly move on to our agenda?
What would happen if we gave pause after the first response, allowing an arena for someone to respond a little deeper. If we sat silent not breaking eye contact, what else would be shared. Perhaps we don't want to get involved in other peoples drama, but there is a difference between listening and being involved. Every person we know hides a portion of his or her true self.
As we hide parts of ourselves, the more invisible we become. When we no longer believe anyone is seeing us, we begin to loathe ourselves which distorts the vision of the inner and outer worlds. Offering the opportunity for a person to feel recognized can change the direction of a life. "So, how are you, really?"
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