Essential Choice

"Hold close to your essential self."

Shauna Niequist

Our schedules are riddled with activities under the guise of seeking peace. It is a sacred time of year, yet filled with superficial agendas. This is a season where we truly need to be deliberate with our thoughts, actions, and spiritual communication, as the energy we create within extends back out into our surroundings.

When we become aware of the messages lingering in our hearts, we are more mindful with our behaviors. Acknowledging our unconscious or subconscious projections, helps us to align so that we can present in a meaningful way. Holding ourselves accountable, we can eliminate beliefs that no longer resonate with our soul.

Living deliberately, we gather a greater sense of power, realizing that mindsets and lifestyles can be edited for authenticity. As the physical world reflects back to us, we can choose to take the time to select how we want our time to be invested. With this momentum, we begin to change our world and our contribution to it.  

 

During the Holidays

 

“I've spent most of my life and most of my friendships holding my breath and hoping that when people get close enough they won't leave, and fearing that it's a matter of time before they figure me out and go.”

Shauna Niequist
Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way


The month of December can trigger all kinds of problems for us if we do not maintain healthy boundaries.  It is a season to please others at the expense of ourselves, so we must be mindful of our emotions and limitations.

Social gatherings can be a huge hurdle.  We wonder if we will know anyone else attending, we feel uncomfortable in our dress up clothes, and we long to return to the sanctuary of our home.  If we are truly in sync with our inner self, we will be able to discern what level of fear we are experiencing.   We have a moment in the 'adult chair' and explore our options.  We can make a quick appearance as to not offend the host or we can simply turn to home.  We can give ourselves permission to preview our invitations and decline before we are placed in an anxious position. 

This season also brings an awareness to some if they are not invited to anything.  We can feel either relief or isolation.  There are two things to be considered here:  1.  Are we alone by design or 2.  Do we need to be more socialized.    Whatever the truth is in our heart, it will help us to react in appropriate ways. 

We can excuse ourselves from social gatherings we have no connection to, but we can also endeavor to create some form of activity that would be a new tradition.  If we enjoy our home, we can invite just a few people over for a brief period of time.  If we don't cook, we can ask each person to bring their favorite deli choice.  If we are not comfortable with people in our home, invite a few friends to meet at a small restaurant or museum or place of interest. 

We need to acknowledge how we feel in order to meet our needs.  If we are constantly dreading an invasion of people or feeling obligated to purchase unrealistic gits, then we need to be more honest with ourselves.  Eliminate, gracefully, the situations that no longer enhance the spirit of the season.  Introduce new traditions that will help maintain the reverence of our relationship with others.

When we love and respect ourselves, when we are aligned with body, mind, and spirit, and when we support healthy boundaries, our true self emerges.  We can step through the fear of disapproval, and respect our true self by taking more meaningful actions and by using our time to build us up, not take us down.