Listening in Silence

 

 

 

"Being alone isn't so bad as long as you like your own company."

Byron Pulsifer

 

 

 

 

Surrounded by new found silence, I take inventory of myself.  I review the holidays observing scenarios and discover how my behaviors have been altered either deliberately or out of necessity.  Inside I feel how I have changed, but realize from the outside I must appear the same. 

 

Mark Nepo, author of SEVEN THOUSAND WAYS TO LISTEN,  encourages us to really hear what is being shared. We all change whether it shows on the outside or not, so we must listen for the internal shifts in order to stay on the same wave length.  We do not need to immediately respond to the alteration when it is heard, but it is helpful to make note of it for future conversations.  By listening, the person before us is continuously evolving and by paying attention, we find others to be far less than boring.

 

There are times of course when we are the speaker and we share out loud a change in our thinking.  The listener may do a double take and yet say nothing in response.  Perhaps it is just as well, as maybe we were just trying out new words that had not been spoken before.  Sometimes these words floating out of our mouths for the first time, may validate what we have been hoarding within for some time.  This virgin action of said words, may just be a practice run for using a yet stronger voice later or maybe to experience the need for retraction due to a premature utterance.

 

Sometimes I learn the deeper meaning to conversations when I play them back through my mind.  Without distractions while sitting in silence, I can truly hear what the person is saying and what words linger, without being spoken.  The same holds true for myself.  In my mind, replaying the holidays, I notice how I fall back into old roles and what courage it often times takes to introduce new parts of me.

 

I can honestly say that I like myself even though there are parts I would like to change.  Overall I enjoy who I have grown to be whether others happen to notice or not.  Being alone, I can hear my self as well as the wisdom of others.  I am the company I keep.