Duality, Two Sides of a Coin

 

 

 

 

 

"she felt separated again.

on her own again.

it wasn't that it was bad ~

it just took adjusting."

 

 

www.BoneSighArts.com 

When we graduate from eighth grade, we feel like we have learned all that has been offered and we eagerly look forward to transitioning into high school.  We yearn for new surroundings, new friends, and broadening our knowledge.  The same holds true for when we transition to college and then on to master or doctorate levels.  We experience this once again as we go to a new job and then hopefully get promoted into a higher position.  We look forward to advancement.

We frequently over look the other side of the coin.  It takes time to learn new routines, like figuring out which hall way to go down.  There are new passwords to learn for lockers, computers or perhaps the private bathroom.  The people who welcome us the first some times end up to be those we would want for friends, last. 

If we find our selves at a higher level of learning, we may feel like a penny or a nickle wondering how long it will be before change allows us to be elevated to a dime or a quarter.  This adjustment period can be difficult emotionally, intellectually, physically, and spiritually.

Unfortunately in this world of duality and constant change, we may have to experience the flip of the coin.  What we have anticipated may not be what we receive at all.  We may have been hood winked into believing the new situation would be decidedly different from what it now appears to be.  Complications settle in as we try to figure out whether to stay or go.

This process of making change can be experienced through education, employment, relationships, and life transitions.  The important token to be remembered is that nothing is forever.  With each transition, there will be some level of discomfort, but we have options and choices.

While breaking a dollar bill for change, we receive an assortment of coins.  These coins have just as much value as the paper money.  When we embrace all pieces with value, our adjustments are more durable.  Do not struggle or resist forthcoming transactions, as this is like discarding loose change.  With each step we take, diligently discover the worth of each segment for it is building a foundation. 





If Not For Our Selves ...

 

"If you do not express your own original ideas,

If you do not listen to your own being,

You will have betrayed yourself."

 

 

Alexandra Stoddard

 THINGS I WANT MY DAUGHTERS TO KNOW

 

 

 

 

This is the time for us to use our voice.   We have listened to the philosophers, mentors, and leaders.  Now we can build on previous insights, creating our very own perceptions.  We are each born with a unique message.  If we don't believe we are worthy of sharing our knowledge, the impact of our message will not fall upon the world. 

 

It is not as though we each have a historical comment to make to the international news.  Our words, however, are important to one person or many, waiting for direction.  Certainly we can each think back into past years, recalling the impact of some one else's comment.  The words may have been random, the speaker may not even remember having said them, but the words impacted behaviors or emotions.  Divine Spirit frequently uses us as an instrument to transfer messages unknowingly to others.

 

A dear sister of my heart was talking with her grandson.  She found herself to a be flabbergasted when this child made reference to dreams she had years ago.  When he first mentioned the subject, she was puzzled until he reminded her of her earlier reported dreams.  The grandson, now 13 years old, reminded my friend of her action in the dreams even though he had only been a toddler when the dream content had been shared.  My lovely friend's words may have been lost to her, but they were of significant importance to the child.

 

Listening is an important tool, helping us to determine whether we agree or disagree with other opinions.  Reading is another way to build a foundation for our belief system.  Speculation, visualization and meditation help us to explore both our inner and outer worlds.  In time, significant information reflecting our essence takes form.  This form is what can be radiated out into the world. 

 

Authentic voices will draw kindred spirits together.  Divine Spirit will make certain our voices will be heard, in the manner in which they are needed, in spite of being in our own way.  We need to honor our self by speaking up, if not for our selves, then for others.

 

 



Lulled by Water

"The emotional states are liberated inside water,

we calm down emotionally,

we become more sensitive,

we are able to 'touch' deeper ourselves and other beings.

Empathy is echoing back to us

giving subtle vibrations from the realm of the senses.

Find your water ..."

 

Grigoris Deoudis

 

 

Water takes on the shape of its container.  It can be a liquid raindrop or frozen hail.  It can be a fine mist or a roaring ocean.  It is a very strong force in nature, nurturing or devastating.  It is no surprise to learn that water is the symbol or element for emotion.  Our emotions can be as gentle or as harsh as water and our bodies contain an extremely high percentage of water.

As a small child, I learned how to swim and ice skate on Lake Michigan.  I spent yearly vacations in Wisconsin surrounded by lakes, rivers, and streams.  My love for being in the water made me a natural for competitive swimming, followed by life guard training.  In high school, every summer I would go on a supervised canoe trip, portaging into Canada. There were many winters when I would find myself at the "rocks" bordering the lake in the city where the waves would lull me into a sense of safety.  My college of choice conveniently over looked the Mississippi River where I would be able to explore my passion and challenge.

As years passed, I still found myself living near swimming pools or vacationing near water ways.  I no longer have a passion for swimming, but the need to be near water is just as strong.
After stressful days, I self-nurture with baths containing at least bubbles and maybe some flower petals or essential oil, while music gently plays in the background.  Even a small fountain bubbling water on a desktop brings a smile to my face.

I have visited Maui twice each for a month long stay.  The condo was right on the ocean front with a sandy beach just steps away.  The  lanai allowed me to write watching the whales surface a short distance away.  I could hear little children squeal as a wave unexpectedly washed their feet along the beach.  In the neighboring building, I watched sun bathers spread out in lounge chairs around their pool.  The vacation cruise boats could be seen in the far distance as I watched the sun rise and the sun set.  At night, the sliding door would be left open as to not miss even one small wave rolling in to the shore.  Being surrounded by water daily, I felt suspended in time, like I was living in some different realm where stories consistently unfolded.  It took on the feel of a spiritual quest.  Meditation, writing, reading, and just 'being' were all deeply enhanced throughout the stay.

In real day to day life, I resort to taking a shower to wash away the hardships of the day.  Standing under the spout, I imagine being in a waterfall.  This is what I do, how I address my self-nurturing, to feel connected, and lulled. 

What is it that you do ... to self care and nurture?

Even if Frightened

 

 

 

 

 

"Speak from your heart,

even if it frightens you."

 

Sonia Choquette

THE POWER OF YOUR SPIRIT

 

 

 

There were two choices available to me: 1.  Say nothing about my opposition to the decision of other people and be disengaged for months; and 2.  Voice my opinion in a sincere voice using kind words, thus, being able to remain connected.  Even though I had rehearsed my decision, choosing exact words, I found myself immediately blurting out my string of objections when I next joined the others.  I felt as though if I had waited for the perfect moment, I would swallow my words forever.

 

In the discussion that followed, I came to realize that others in the group had been considering the same concerns.  Others had not used their voices in a silent gesture of going along to get along. We reassessed our needs and agreed to follow a different path offering a more realistic way of moving forward.

 

Just one week prior, I had encouraged others to join me in creating an additional group.  I spoke with passion engaging the others to join me with this new task.  In the following days, I made a discovery.  If I used my passion and energy for this new goal, I would be avoiding an earlier commitment.  This would result in neglecting my first project and not having 100% to invest in the second.   When I gave thought to this new project, things definitely were not falling into place.  There were even a few road blocks preventing progress.  I realized I needed to retract this second quest personally, and face embarrassment in front of the others. 

 

My mind was having a wonderful time exploring what the comments of others might be, but for once, I turned down the volume.  So a few days later, I faced my companions to tell them I needed to withdraw the very passionate request of just one week prior.  I explained to them my need to remain focused on an earlier project, and truly believed this new endeavor, although a good one, would be only an avoidance technique my ego very creatively proposed.  In my heart, I knew I was doing the right thing, but in front of my peers, I felt I was losing credibility.

 

In both scenarios, I managed to step through fear and instead of discovering negative consequences on the other side, I found a sense of personal strength.  I was also keenly amazed that others had held back their voices just as I had.  We are all very articulate women, but our eagerness to be loving and caring towards others caused us to betray our very sense of self.

 

Fear triggers havoc in our spiritual connections, physical health, and emotional status.  Collectively, we have given fear extensive power over us, forgetting that it is only an illusion.  Television, News and Media, fill us with fear.  What we decide to focus upon, attracts more of the same.

 

Ego coos fear into our ears.  Our determination and evaluation of self becomes weakened. We minimize our personal strengths, and our power slowly dissipates from our desires and dreams.   The good news is that we can use the power of speech and still  remain loving and caring.   For some, using voice may hurt others, so they choose to hurt themselves instead.

 

In her book, THE POWER OF YOUR SPIRIT, Sonia Choquette encourages us to experience the changes within our body when we use our voice and when we don't.  By remaining silent, tension and stress accumulates in our necks, shoulders, and in the way we carry ourselves.   When we step through the illusion of fear, our body feels more relaxed and alive.  Our mind then tends to think of more pleasant and creative ideas.  We find more energy in our day and deeper sleep at night.

 

One of the exercises in the above mentioned book, encourages us to say out loud: "If I weren't afraid, I would . . . "  The author suggests we state this completed sentence repeatedly for several minutes.  Notice the energy and freedom we initially feel.    Then also notice the shift when a fear surfaces. 

 

If we try to place this fear out side of our selves and imagine it were a bird leisurely flying out through our front door, we can better connect with our authentic feelings.  As the imaginary bird flutters outside, we can creatively think of ways of dealing with it.  We can put it in a cage, find a different home for it, set it free, or simply close the door.

 

When we give consideration to a problem as if it were outside of our selves, we can more easily keep our emotions in place.  We can be more objective and create a list of options.  Sometimes just committing to discover a resolution increases our energy to follow through.

 

We were frightened when we were first learning how to ride a bike or read aloud in front of our class.  Our fears did not prevent us from proceeding and succeeding.  The same is true for speaking our truth.  It may be frightening at first, but the more we use it, we will be experiencing more energy, self-respect, and freedom.  When we fall off the bike, we get back on.

If we are corrected for mispronouncing a word, we can be even more determined to get it right.

 

When we speak a heartfelt truth, place one hand over our heart.  Let our hand keep us connected to our personal power.  This gesture makes us more mindful and helps to calm our fears. Our inner voice begins to speak more clearly and we become far more aware of who we are, what we desire, and the intentions of Divine Spirit. 

 

 

 



Grounded in Delightful Way

 

 

 

 

"Look at the tree in the front yard.  The tree doesn't

seem to be doing anything.  It stands there, vigorous, fresh,

and beautiful, and everyone profits from it.  That's the miracle

of being.  If a tree were less than a tree, all of us would

be in trouble.  But if a tree is just a real tree, then there's

hope and joy.  That's why if you can be yourself,

this is already action."

 

Thich Nhat Hanh

YOUR TRUE HOME

 

 

 



There is much to be learned from trees, and not just one tree, but any of the varieties.  Trees can be found in the forest, or shading the White House, or as an ornamental design for a private pool.  Some are fruit bearing while others flower or not.  It does not matter how many exact trees are lined in a row, one can find a difference in each and every one. 

An exercise in school when I was a child, called for us to be like a tree.  I can remember flailing my arms around like branches in a storm.  I can recall holding my arms up very still so a bird would not fall.  The class was instructed  to be quiet tree while a stranger leaned against our bark and then  to embrace snowflakes as they gently fell to the ground.

It comes as no surprise, then, my life long infatuation with trees.  Like a palm tree, if I do not have strong roots, I am likely to fall over when faced with strong winds.  A Weeping Willow has such grace, but having too much emotion, life can become messy.  Young trees use their energy for growth and deep roots, and then later to form buds.  How grand they must feel when the leaves begin to sprout or the flowers innocently unveil themselves.  Does a tree experience sadness when the last leaf falls or the petals turn brown?  A tree must have faith that another season will come along.  The same faith must support the spirit of a tree when a branch is broken or when a neighboring tree is struck by lightening. 

My over-personification with trees might not be appreciated by others, but I cannot think of healthier role models.  They reflect the on going challenges of life and the consequences of what is called progress when a city expands.  They lovingly support the creatures in nature and display unbelievable determination in the midst of storms.  Trees seemed to be settled into themselves, content with individual beauty  and are a constant. 

Trees show me the best way to pass through this life.  The deeper I sink my roots into Mother Earth the stronger I will be.  To extend my arms up to Divine Spirit connects me.  When my roots sink deeply and my arms stretch strongly, energy surges up and energy streams down.  I find myself to be grounded in the most delightful way!

Holding the Light ... Terri St Cloud

 

 

 

 

"holding the light"

 

Terri St Cloud

BONE SIGH ARTS

 

 

Visit Terri St Cloud at www.BoneSighArts.com and request a sticker of the above picture image.  It is a new project of hers, to help spread the light in the darkness.  Use this free sticker wherever you choose: bumpers, windows, journals, or anywhere it can be properly displayed.

 

Let's help Terri St Cloud extend her project by circulating her free sticker  "holding the light".   Share it with groups, circles, and friends.  Let's help the light shine!!!

Victim or Student

"When God is going to do something wonderful, He or She always starts with a hardship;  when
God is going to do something amazing, He or She starts with an impossibility." 

Ann Lamott
PLAN B: FURTHER THOUGHTS ON FAITH



At some point in time, we finally make the transition from "Why is this happening to me?" to "What is the lesson to be learned?"  When we set our selves up in the martyr role, we are stuck in a pity party.  As a victim, our energy is focused on the personal misfortune.  When we take the viewpoint of a student about to learn a lesson, our focus is on creatively developing our strengths to address the problem coming out stronger on the other side. 

When I make presentations, I frequently have the audience take a blank piece of paper, and divide it in  half by drawing a line across from left to right.  This will be forming a time line.  I first request each person to write under the line, listing hardships or challenges they have faced over the years.  One can feel the tension growing in the room.  A heavy silence invisibly hangs over us.  Next, I request each person to write above the line, just using short phrases about celebrations and accomplishments.  A more joyful atmosphere unfolds.  The tension lifts and members of the audience engage with each other.  Lastly, I ask them to go back to their paper and make a star or check mark by any event that dramatically changed their lives.   It is during this time realization sets in.  Our lives are impacted and redirected by experiencing difficult times more so than through happy events.  The stars or check marks tend to be under the line and not above.

It is important to re-frame the circumstance so that we can see it as a learning tool.  If the situation facing us is more overwhelming, we may not see the lesson to be learned until after the fact when time has passed and we have survived.  In the moment we feel so very alone, and scramble to find the necessary tools to rectify our difficult situation.  Many years may pass before the realization hits us ... "If that had not happened to me earlier on, I would never been prepared for this moment."

Thinking of life as a puzzle, we have many pieces sliding easily into place, making a nice border.  Then there are those inner pieces that have to be arranged and rearranged before the proper fit is made.  Some pieces arrive early and we hold them in wonderment, thinking, "What am I supposed to do with this?"  Later, the dawning shines.  There are other pieces we know we need to complete our puzzle, but some pieces simply cannot be found.  We find ourselves waiting for what seems like eternity.  Eventually, however, when the pieces are all neatly  together, we can appreciate the overall beauty of our life.

The Best Partner

 

 

 

"When we can learn to meet our needs without relying on someone else to complete us, we don't have to form relationships from the space of needing our emptiness to be filled."

Madisyn Taylor
DAILY OM

 

When we are not in relationship, there is time to enhance the relationship with our selves.  We can grow our selves, relax into  healing, and explore our creative instincts. Make a list of all the things you love to do, and then do them.  One does not require a mate to live life to the fullest. 

 

FLOWERS

Decades ago, a relationship had ended and I truly missed being surprised with flowers.  I loved flowers and enjoyed having them in my home.  The absence of flowers began to make me feel sad.  I finally decided the importance was having flowers and not who purchased them.  My attitude quickly shifted by buying flowers for myself.  Every week I would purchase flowers to bring home and they brought life back into my home.  In a way, I was honoring myself.

 

MOVIES

I missed going to the show.  Several good ones went unseen, as I found it difficult to go alone.  One afternoon, on impulse, I walked into a movie.  Hardly any one was attending, and I instructed myself to open my heart to receive the message of this film.  I asked Divine Spirit to enable me to become totally absorbed, forgetting about my present life.  The movie was THE GREEN MILE and it was one of the best movie experiences I have ever had.

 

DINING OUT

I found myself cringing every time I was asked, "Table for one?"  I felt myself shrink and desire to be invisible; however, a good meal needs to be had.  With practice, I learned to respond differently when asked about a table.  I would wear a huge smile and excitedly say, "Yes!"  My body language and attitude reflected how proud I was to be alone and mastering the situation.  I soon learned to get out of my head and be present for the entire dining experience.  I would choose to go early as to not appear to be some sort of yearning pickup, but I would take time getting ready.  Other times I would go for a late lunch with a book or journal as my companion.  It was a matter of respecting myself.  Being comfortable in any situation.

 

BED TIME

As the sun falls, and darkness grows, bed time is not far behind.  Sleeping alone can sometimes be the most challenging.  The trick is to change routines.  Buy new sheets or a few new pillow cases.  Put flowers by your bed.  Take a leisurely bath with bubbles or a shower to wash off the day.  Towel dry the body with a new soft towel.  Find something comfy to sleep in.  Light a tea light and crawl into bed with the nightstand filled with magazines or books.  Keep a gratitude journal and every night before bed, write down everything to be grateful for ... even if it is just gratitude for the day to be over.

 

I realize life alone can become overwhelming.  One can look around a room and see two chairs, two goldfish, two birds, two candlesticks, etc ... Once we realize we can alter our perspective and attitude we can begin to overhaul our creative outlets.  If we seek places of personal interest, what better than to meet someone at a museum or art gallery or community festival?  The likelihood of meeting someone with common interest is higher at a point of interest than a bar.

 

For those of us who are in relationship, we sometimes find a particular need not being met.  One person or partner cannot meet all of our needs.  So even if in relationship, do not neglect to nurture the relationship with self.  If there is an interest our partner does not share, go immerse the lovely self by attending alone or with a friend. 

 

We can honor our self by being the best partner we have ever had!

 



Castle In Our Mind

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Rocks in my path?

I keep them all.

With them I shall build my castle."

 

Nemo Nox

 

 

 

We all have rocks on our paths.  Some may be small pebbles while others may be large boulders.  Pebbles may not attract our attention, but there are some rocks we find compelled to carry in our pockets for awhile.  These rocks may end up in our garden or on our desk.  Boulders, however, require a great deal of attention.  We may take time assessing this roadblock, deciding to go around it, climb over it, or determine it is a dead end. Barriers can either be an ending or a new beginning.

 

Pebbles, rocks, and boulders are all symbols for the challenges we encounter during our life times.  How we arrange these stones determines our foundation.  If we carelessly toss them upon a pile, discarding them, they will form a large barrier to be faced later.  If we give each consideration, and place them carefully, we can build a strong foundation.

 

There are some who create a barricade using their rocks and boulders (symbols of challenge), while others may be prompted to build a lovely terrace.  A waterfall for example, is supported by carefully positioned rocks that support and deflect, allowing water (symbol of emotion) to release and flow. 

 

We can sit with a problem or rock for a long time seeking solution or we can throw it at some one as a defense although not a good one.  With our challenges, we can build isolating walls or healing bridges, as the choice is ours.  If our problems are piling up and we cannot visualize an architect's sketch it is wise to seek the help of a professional to develop a structure with a safety plan.

 

We all have rocks in our heads, so to speak and what we do with them is of great importance.  As we sort through these rocks or problems, we find our selves to be a creator taking short cuts or allowing time for healing details.  We will reside within the structure we build, and based upon our efforts we will either battle the winds of time or creatively play in the castle of our mind.

 



Second Call

 

 

 

"It is never too late

to be what we might have been."

 

George Eliot

 

 

 



At one time, students were required to claim their major in the freshman year.  No matter how sincere the choice may have been, numerous students changed majors mid way, tacking on another year of studies to acquire needed classes.  The same holds true for graduating seniors.  Graduating with a particular major does not determine the field the graduate ends up pursuing.  Those seeking a master or a doctorate are more specific and even then are frequently older students returning to a different field.

Whether we choose to be a mother, priest, teacher, doctor or dentist, makes no difference as these are all labels and not who we are as an individual being.  We might be a rocket scientist, but still have other roles defining the self such as aunt or uncle, father or mother, and sister or brother.  Again, these are all parts of the authentic self, but not the subtle essence of the whole.

In today's world, retirement is simply the beginning of another chapter in life.  Freedom offers new choices ranging from beginning a new second career or seeking to become a Master Gardener.  Men and women alike, find this time to create smaller parts of themselves.  A man may set up a thorough workshop and begin to rekindle his passion for carpentry.  A woman may turn to her original love for teaching piano.  The options are endless:  dance lessons, music lessons, theater, artistic persuasion of every sort, volunteer opportunities or travel.

Seniors will talk about these second careers with fire in their belly.  There is delight in their words and joy in their appearance.  It truly makes me wonder what this person might have become if at first they followed their passion rather than the financial trail.  I am not saying many of us do not carry passion into our original work, but there are those who were discouraged from pursuing an authentic calling. 

If there is something we have always longed to do, make plans to do it.  If we set our minds to the desired task, nothing will block our way.  These second callings can be far more creative in their origin or presentation, entirely decided by our inner voice.  The driving force is not to 'make it in the world', but to honor our essence for simple delight. 

One of our retired presidents has had a very full life of wealth, politics, and responsibilities.  In addition to leading a very vigorous physical life now, he also paints.  It is something he always wanted to do.  Is he particularly good?  Well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  Point being, the man is doing something that called to him regardless of what others thought, whether he was good or not.  He is answering his second callings.

If we give our selves quiet time, we will discover what calls to us.  Allow our imagine to run with an idea, to visualize to our heart's content so a future dream can take shape.  The more we nurture our inner desires, the more we will have to offer our community and our world ... just by answering our second call.

(There is a woman who began collecting books for a small town that lost their library.  She has grown a full scale library, building a larger foundation connecting with numerous communities of readers who pass their books along.)

(Their is a man who recruits students from vocational schools in the summer time.  He takes on larger projects when he has the additional help and teaches the students through hands on experience.)

(A church could not support a choir director and did not have leadership within their congregation.  A woman in the community with a music background set up specific boundaries
and donates her time for this choir.)

(A local artist visits an elementary school where her granddaughter attends.  The art department has limited resources, so she brings art alive once per month for all classes, an hour at a time.  Same project for each class, just differing levels of ability.)

(A retired nurse goes to her church one day per month to give seniors an opportunity to have blood pressure taken, etc ...   The opportunity was so highly attended she applied for a grant to expand her offerings.)

If we give our selves permission to kindle our heart's desire, we only need to get out of our way!  Remember this second calling can be a very small pleasure just for our selves.  Secure a date once per week to go to a library, museum, or our own backyard to sketch!  Just do it!

Whiff of Turpentine

 

 

"There is no gate,

no lock,

no bolt

that you can set upon

 the freedom of my mind."

 

Virginia Woolf

A ROOM OF ONE'S OWN

My memory is very extensive and precise, unless I am looking for my glasses or keys.  I sometimes amaze myself at what I can recall and also become aware of the feelings attached.  In addition to memory, my mind is highly visual, capable of creating endless scenarios.  My mental pictures filed away are always crisp with color and easily turn into motion pictures upon will. 

My brain impacts my reading abilities by combining memory with visions.  As I read, words take on a life of their own allowing my mind to slip between the lines for a deeper sense of discovery.  Books become friends imparting the nature of people. Authors and their words create a classroom for the reader to delve beyond the page to learn first hand of every thing imagined or real.

Our perspective on life is seasoned with  the salt and pepper of our past experiences.  Our personal tastes adjust our palates for acceptable blends.  We choose resources and associates who support our view, strengthening our own reality.  We avoid discord by building emotional walls and discounting others through judgement or disdain.  This all of course disrupts the natural flow, dams the waters, and causes the sun to sink behind the clouds.

Together with brain, memory, and visions, we receive imprints from nature, Divine Spirit, and dreams.  We acquire certain 'knowings' along the way that are completely untraceable.  These knowings may come from a painter's brush or the melody in a song.  Sometimes just a whiff of turpentine or the faint sound of wind chimes stir the mind into collating random things we are not certain as to how we knew.   Our mind does not seem to explore the roots of such knowings, as it is captured by the resonance vibrating in one's own heart.

Who is to claim the origin of our knowings and desires of the heart?  Who really knows where the passion is first stirred?  When we are in hot oil of long past memories, who among the wounded can predict when the kernel of truth will finally pop?  When we breathe our last breath, will it be the bright light and tunnel that we see?

We are called to be satisfied  through understanding what we cannot hear or see.  We are encouraged to seek using affirmations and positivity.  The mind is endless when it comes to possibility.  Let your brain be free, creating opportunity where others never look nor see. 



 

 



Chaos Giving Way to Birth

 

 

"You must have chaos within you

to give birth to a dancing star."

 

Friedrich Nietzsche

 

 

 

As a child, I watched a television program initially entitled, OUR GANG.  Later it was known at THE LITTLE RASCALS.  Although I cannot recall any particular themes from this show, I was impacted, in an odd way, by the character named Farina.  She wore her hair in numerous little braids that stuck out all over her head.  As I am a very visual person, I transformed this unique pattern of Farina's hair into the images of the frequencies in my brain.  Spending much of my life in what I term "confusion" I would frequently say, "My brain is in 'farinas.'"  To this very day, I will use the same verbiage.

 

Friedrich Nietzsche's quote, "You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star," holds great comfort for me.  It seems to validate my lengthy stages of  confusion as having a positive outcome.  My definition of confusion would include:  inconsistency; judgement; weakness; absence rather than presence; shame; and misdirection.  Each one of these words caused my brain to contort into 'farinas'.   Unfortunately, many of these words were often linked together which extended my 'farinas' into great projections.

 

In years of development,  living in my smaller self, withdrawing and minimizing personal power, I was not able to identify with biblical standards, society's goals, parental expectations or even neighborhood playmates.  It never occurred to me that eventually I would be able to gather the shards of the broken mirror and find a healthy reflection. 

 

Perhaps these are just some of the reasons I would find peace lying on my back mentally reaching for the stars.  Stars were so incredibly bright and mesmerizing.  They all twinkled out of sequence which seemed to inspire me.  They were all different sizes and even when it was cloudy, one clearly felt the presence of the stars.

 

To visually embrace the stars calmed my brain allowing thoughts to become untangled.  Star frequencies would regulate into a rhythm that lulled my own frequencies.  The cadence of the shining stars brought me peace and a sense of safety, creating a space to birth my perfect star.



Written by Hand

 

 

"Torah scrolls, written by hand, contain 304,805 letters and may take more than a year to produce.  If a single mistake is made, the entire scroll becomes invalid."

THE INTELLECTUAL DEVOTIONAL

David S. Kidder & Noah D. Oppenheim

Penmanship changes with age and also from disuse.  More people are dependent upon computers, iPads or iPhones, none of which require physical writing.  Letters, term papers, and documents may originate in long hand writing, but usually, these items are eventually printed by printers attached to computers. 

 

If first attempts at writing are a first draft, one is not as careful in forming the alphabetical letters contained within words.  Grammar tends to be not as accurate to say nothing of the lapse in sentence structure.  Spell check catches such errors and we are less dependent upon our own accuracy.

 

The passion for writing becomes more challenging when the writer is required to start all over when a mistake is made.  Not just discarding one sentence or one paragraph or one page, but everything.  Just the thought of beginning over and over is overwhelming.  What about smeared ink?  What about skipping a word?  No allowance for human error?  How about daily disruptions . . . feeding the family, phone answering, or bathroom breaks?  What happens when a pen runs out of ink and the color is no longer matched?  Can the writer insert substitutions if the language is unclear? 

 

A day of gratitude and thanksgiving has been declared for my thesaurus.   I am deeply appreciative of modern technology and my freedom of speech.  I am blessed by the flow of words streaming through me and I am honored for the unknown kindred spirits reading this page.  I am totally in awe of the long line of generations of writers spanning across all of time enabling creative expression.

 

 



Incubated in Warm Loving Water

 

"Whatever you do, be different -

that was the advice my mother gave me,

and I can't think of better advice

for an entrepreneur.

If you're different,

you will stand out."

 

Anita Roddick

 



When I came across this quote, I put it "on" to try it out.  I immediately felt like I was being incubated in warm loving water.  I felt as though I was beginning  life naked and everything I would choose to wear or embrace would totally be of my discretion.  The water surrounding me was clear, supportive, and embracing. 

These words by Anita Roddick are completely contradictory from the words I heard.  The directives for me came in questions:  "Why can't you be like Suzy?  Why do you have to read so much?  Why aren't you joining a group?  Don't stand out, fit in! Why can't you just be like all of the other kids?" The pressure to belong or fit in was not as great as the message of something being 'wrong' with me.

When I was in the midst of parenting, I read an article about a young couple who were adopting a baby.  They were both very invested, but the soon to be father made a comment that stayed with me all of these years.  He said about raising the forth coming child, "I can hardly wait to watch him unfold.  It will be like unwrapping a gift discovering who he is and who he is meant to be."  I was so happy that these parents were not projecting expectations about this child.  They wanted to nurture him and give him strength to find his own way.

I am seasoned enough to know there are children who have been given positive nurturing and still find themselves in trouble.  Growing children is an incredibly difficult thing to do.  I cannot help but wonder, however, how different our world would be if all children were allowed to foster their heart's desire.   What if we calculated the perfect balance of guidance and freedom?  How would our world appear if we were able to view our inner self as beautiful and capable of accomplishing pursuit of our dreams?  If we used the billions of dollars we spend on wars, and created healthy and creative opportunities for all children, perhaps we would breed peace through compassion and acceptance.

Kicking Up Some Dust

 

 

 

"A woman is the full circle.

Within her is the power

to create, nurture, and transform."

 

Diane Mariechild

 

 

 

 

This morning, I was reading an inspirational message from www.tut.com which referred to following our own path.  It was suggesting we not start out following the yellow brick road, but to seek the opportunity to drift off the beaten path.  If we choose to wander off, we kick up some dust erasing the obvious foot prints.  We then are called to use our instinct, intuition, and gut feelings to more or less 'feel' our way or to follow our heart.

 

The life of a woman is so frequently symbolized by a spiral.  We go around and around, deeper and deeper, discovering parts of ourselves.  As we travel, we experience lessons and also repeat said lessons on different levels until we have become a master of our knowing.

 

There are circles of women gently floating together from time to time, but separated regularly like clouds wandering the blue sky.  There are other circles of women who are more like a chain, strongly connected vowing never to be apart.  Sharing our visions, writings, charities and art work, contributes to the circle of relationship world wide. 

 

Although women can be very analytical, they are also very creative in their approach to resolving situations.  Their power is created through inner strengths, not necessarily through physical girth.  Women display their power through personal empowerment rather than power over others.   

 

Circles of women have been forming since the beginning of time.  It is natural for them as they continuously create circles within themselves.  They create a nubbin of an idea, incubate it, nurture and encourage growth, and see it to fruition . . . until the circle is complete.  Sometimes one circle is not enough whether it is knitting, cooking, or creating a business. How many times will a woman rip out her handiwork and redo it or alter a recipe year after year?  Women travel the same circle frequently, until they are satisfied with the circle.

 

Whether a woman is focused on flowers, children, career or all things mentioned, she will endeavor to create, nurture and transform.  A woman herself is a circle, being reworked over and over throughout the years.  Her physical form itself becomes a circle of radiance and light when she manages to wander off that beaten path following her authentic steps to self-discovery.

 

 

 

Creative Form

freedom:
abandon, boldness, brazenness, candor, directness, ease, informality, lack of restraint, lack of reserve, openness, spontaneity, unrestrained, power, privilege, independence, flexibility, immunity . . .                             

Roget's 21st Century Thesaurus



Freedom is one of those words that have various meanings.  It can be defined differently by age, gender and ethnicity.  Even when detailed by the same age or gender or ethnicity, the definitions carry not only different meanings, but a cross range of emotions as well.

What does freedom mean to you?
To have a leg out of a cast.
To have a partner gone for the day.
To have a four day weekend.
To not have a curfew.
To eat anything when I want.
To pay off  college loans.
To have children become adults.
To use voice without fearing consequence.
To be accepted in spite of shortcomings.
To be let out of class early.

There is a common component running through these definitions.  Each experience with freedom creates 'space' that can be physical or mental or spiritual. This space allows the opportunity to experience a 'pause' from our limitations or restrictions.  Each experience also has a consequence, some times affirming yet some times not.  What price do we pay for freedom with our body, mind, and spirit?

Creative freedom is important to any living experience.  Each individual should be able to express themselves in creative form that best reflects personal identity. To quote Bryant McGill (Voice of Reason): "Each person carries within their core the birthright of creative freedom, which, when organized and orchestrated, is the most awesome force on earth."  It is through our uniquely creative form that we display our selves to the outer world.  Through the same creative form, we explore our inner spiritual realms creating more deeply.  It is through this created identity within ourselves and outside of ourselves that we develop a sense of personal empowerment.  Once fueled by this sense of freedom and sense of identity, we feel both inspired and safe to bring our passion into the world.

 

Free and Limitless

"We all have a genius within us

and when one of us doesn't develop

or use our special gift,

a cosmic void takes place."

 

Madisyn Taylor

Daily Om

In 1970, Richard Bach wrote, "JONATHAN LIVINGSTON SEAGULL" and several other books followed.  Richard Bach became one of my favorite authors, and I impatiently waited for each of his works.  He was an inspiration then and continues to be so today.

"JONATHAN LIVINGSTON SEAGULL" appears to be a simple book, but within the first pages the reader realizes there is great depth to this story.  It is a small book to be read easily in one sitting, but the story remains with the reader forever.

Richard Bach easily engages us with his characters.  We identify with a seagull facing the illusion of limitations and boundaries.  He challenges us to test our untested beliefs and to experience the pleasure of freedom and flight.  We begin to understand how lessons are meant to be mastered so we can return and help others.  We soon notice the bigger picture, not to overshadow us, but to encourage us to see how our unique contribution to life is inserted into the whole.  Each of us are a significant piece enabling  life to be complete.  Our unique spirit is a significant part in forming completion.

Frequently, we get stuck at the thought we have to make a contribution to the whole.  We think in terms of being a rocket scientist, an inventor, artist, or star of some sort.  We are depleted before we begin with such high expectations.  These expectations, however, are not what we are called to complete.

If we happen to be a rocket scientist, an inventor, artist, or star of some sort, then great; but life is calling us to grow into a person of integrity.  Whatever we choose to be in life, what label or role, is of significance, but not the vital thread.  The kind of person we come to be and how we help others is the underlying goal.  As we work on becoming accomplished, how do we help others?  How do we give back? 

As a materialistic culture, we can either have too many things or not enough.  When asked to 'help' others, we immediately think of finances.  Our financial status can help others, but again, the underlying goal is supplying unique abilities to others.  The art of giving is not necessarily about material goods or money. 

As human beings evolving into spiritual awareness, we honor our selves and the the existence of all others.  We embrace diversity and begin to recognize our own personal strengths.  The art of giving involves respect, and honor.  It is through sharing and cooperation we begin to break down the walls of being separate.  We begin to see the illusion of fear.  We receive the ability to take flight ... to be free and limitless.

THINK

 

 

 

"The unexamined life is not worth living."

 

Socrates

(470-399 BC)

 

 

 

Socrates was widely considered the founder of Western philosophy. His greatest student was Plato who offered perhaps the most accurate representation of Socrates dialogues.  Socrates was born in Greece, spent time as a soldier, and then became a part of Athenian society as a curious fellow.  He spent his time seeking conversations with whomever he could find.  He was ever a paid teacher and claimed, "he had nothing to teach."  Typically, Socrates would approach a person who claimed to know something of importance, and then he would challenge the person exhibiting the lack of knowledge of the other.

 

In 399 BC Socrates was put on trial for corrupting the youth of Athens.   In spite of his many dialogues, Socrates never wrote a book.  He was found guilty although he claimed innocence.   He was convicted and put to death by being forced to drink hemlock, a poison.  His last hours were spent gathered with friends and supporters documented by Plato.

 

Once again we find in history a person of significant source surviving even though generations have far surpassed this likelihood.  Socrates wrote dialogues impacting the learning experience of generations even though cultures shifted, wars destroyed, and natural disasters occurred.  It is indeed curious to me the founder of Western philosophy was put to death deliberately by being forced to sip hemlock.

 

Socrates gained his place in history through his words, articulating his spirit within even though it ultimately resulted in his death.  His recognition formed through his ability to encourage others in exploration of their own existence.  He challenged young men to think for themselves and to broaden their perspectives.

 

Socrates did not demand a following.  If anything, he was more prone to keep a smaller presence.  He did not force his insights onto others, but rather guided others to observe their own.  His message was clear, "THINK".

Mentioning Mary



"So too, the "eye for an eye" legends of many an old country teller stand as a way to hand down intelligent cautions to the next generation:  That no one ought dare desecrate what others hold sacred - whether the sacred be innocent people, naive children, humble travelers, or holy images  . . . just in case "what you do unto others will also be done onto you." 

Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD

UNTIE THE STRONG WOMAN

 

While I am still reading UNTIE THE STRONG WOMAN by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, I find myself to be amazed at the attempts to assault, close behind locked doors and hide pictures, statues, or any holy image of the Holy Mother.  This did not happen in a small area, but rather across many countries:  Czeck Republic, Slovakia, Hungary, France, Romania, Russia, land masses of The Middle and Near East, all of Asia, Africa, the Island nations, the mountain nations, the ocean nations, and  the North Countries. 

The myths, legends, or miracles of the Ancestral Great Mother survived literally and figuratively speaking.  Many shrines today hold original paintings or relics once associated with the Holy Mother.  Most impressively, in my opinion, is the fact images of the Blessed Mother were kept very much alive in the hearts and stories of all people. 

There is the debate between fact and fiction, but could not the same be true of Jesus the Christ or the Bible?  To me, accuracy is not the point.  The fact a woman remained in the hearts of so many people; offered hope, encouragement and healing; and survived all attempts of suppression intrigues me. 

Then there is the basic question of "why" this was  ever attempted.  If she were just an ordinary woman without special meaning, why should such efforts be so widely spread to destroy her.  It is at this point I get that little tingle up my spine and the hair on my neck begins to stick out.  What was really going on here with this woman who endured the persecution and humiliation of her son, staying at the cross until he was taken down.  Certainly a woman of strength, but was there really more?

There are those who would say the appearances and miracles of this Mother Mary are folk lore or simple myths or no more than fairy tales.  There are also those who would just as soon finalize this feminine energy today.  This persistent feminine energy which continues to prosper and bring  balance to our world today.

Ego, the Culprit

 

 

 

"The conditioned self is a tangle of contradictory patterns.

Each pattern is intent on fulfilling its own needs and goals.

In many wisdom traditions, this contradictory condition is called the

inner war."

 

Wisdom Heart

A SPIRITUAL PATH FOR REAL LIFE

 

 

A person can develop spiritually through different ways.   There are so many methods to choose from:  yoga, meditation, centering prayer, grounding, artistic expression or solitude.  The list is endless, but if we do not still the brainless chatter within us, we will not be as far as we could be ideally.  Some people are not even aware of the tape that repeats criticism, causing doubt with our choices and decisions. 

 

It goes something like this: "I think I will go for a walk; go this evening when it is cooler.   Maybe I'll do yoga; but I tend to hurt myself when I am unsupervised.  Maybe I will call my friend for coffee; she is probably really busy.  Think I will take a nap; maybe I better put a load of laundry in!"   My inner-critic can talk me out of anything before I even begin. 

 

Self-sabotage, inner critic, inner war or conflicting patterns, all contribute to our steady path forward.  The first step is to just be aware of what is happening.  The second step is to silence the critic.  The third step is to re-frame intention.

 

It is similar to having a spoiled brat inside constantly monitoring actions and thoughts.  The ego of course is the culprit.  It is constantly trying to get its own way by distracting us and breaking efforts towards positive behaviors. 

 

Once we establish awareness of our ego's intention to control, we can silence it or call a truce.  Eventually, we may do well in silencing the ego during spiritual practices, but this still leaves plenty of time for ego's chatter.  Be persistent as once we gain control, we experience a better sense of self. 

 

 

                                                              

 



Out There



"This belief that somewhere 'out there' is the land of joy, dogs our footsteps wherever we go.  As long as we look upon happiness as something outside us, we shall never be able to find it.  Wherever we go, it will still be beyond our reach because 'out there' can never be 'in here'."

 Eknath Easwaran
THOUGHT FOR A DAY



When we are unaware of our Divine connection or have not yet discovered our gifts and talents, it is more difficult to sense the vast knowledge we hold within.  When we remain wounded and unhealed from life's many lessons, the last place a person looks for guidance is inside of self.

We may spend years attempting to fill our self with happiness, only to witness it fade away or simply change.  Children grow up and move away, neighborhoods change, careers get canceled or disrupted, or we cease to have the buying power we once had. 

The intent is not to paint a dark image, but rather to stress how frequently we will attempt  to tap resources when we run out of 'things'.  Not only is our wisdom within our seemingly last choice, it is often chosen out of pure desperation. 

We feel the stirring of self-love once we start removing the debris.  Little by little our light begins to heal our pain and we notice a small change.  Using energy work, meditation, massage, therapy or journaling can assist us in bringing our troubles to the surface.  Professional services or a trusted friend can help untangle the past.  We can compare this to cleaning out a basement.  As we toss unused items, old memories might pop up, but we move them along.  When the clutter has been removed, we marvel at the room inside.  We can walk around without bumping into things and there is enough space to create something different.

When we have resolved old personal issues, there is new space for light.  We feel stronger and our light grows us into places where we feel the void slowly filling up with personal and Divine goodness.  We no longer attempt to buy our happiness with material things or relationships.  We are content to be where ever we are, contained by Spirit, and happy to be connected to all things through Divine guidance.

Cultivating Strengths

"I have come to believe that each of us has a personal calling

that's as unique as a fingerprint -

and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love
and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of service,
working hard, and also allowing the energy of the universe to lead you."

Oprah Winfrey


 

We may find it difficult to identify our unique gifts and talents, as most of us take our blessings for granted.  We may compliment someone on his or her obvious strength, and he or she replies, "Oh, anyone can do that!"  We assume that everyone or anyone can do what we are good at.  We tend to take our gift for granted or minimize it.  It is unfortunate that in our earlier years, we are not groomed highlighting our particular strengths rather than repressing what may come naturally. 

Even if we have a small awareness of doing something fairly well, we find it awkward to receive acknowledgement.  We might say "thank you" and then hurriedly move the conversation in another direction, away from ourselves.  This reflects that we are not truly comfortable in our own skin.  Many people deflect from their true gifts, wearing a mask that seemingly attracts what is more acceptable.  We spend many years overlaying our talents with something socially more acceptable even though we have been created to be unique.

When I was in college, I knew a shy guy who also seemed to be on the edge of a gathering.  He was pretty much a loner, but very approachable and likable.  One night he sat down at a piano and brought absolute silence to the room.  He was incredibly good and had been playing since a small child.  On a different occasion, I was walking across campus and found him keeping in step with me.  I asked him if he were a Music Major and he laughed and said his parents wouldn't allow it.  They had told him he would never make any money playing the piano and needed to provide a better living for himself.  He said he had not given up, and still hoped to find a way to blend his life with music in addition to career.  A few years later, a cartoon hit television and remains on television to this day.  The well known theme song was written by this same young man.  I doubted he was having any money issues! 

I do beleive that we all need to awaken and honor our gifts and talents, finding a way to use them not only for service to others, but also to honor ourselves.  When we do what we love, there is no such thing as work.  If we cultivate our strength, I do beleive the Divine provides a way to be the best we can be.