For it was not into my ear
that you whispered,
but my heart.
It was not my lips
that you kissed,
but my soul.
Judy Garland
We all need to have attention on some level. We need to be noticed to validate our very presence in the world. A simple simile from a passing stranger or a kindness reflected in a quick eye glance. An isolated comment between strangers can have more significance than we could ever imagine.
Isolation can be debilitating and it is happening to children, adults, and the elderly. Children are bullied or not chosen to be a part of a group. Perhaps parents are hard working and too exhausted to have meaningful exchanges. The elderly may be surrounded by others, but frequently withdraw into themselves. Isolation is not only physical. It is emotional and spiritual as well.
Adults as well as children need affection. We all need that physical touch whether it be a handshake, hug, or a massage. Years ago, children spent hours sitting on the laps of their elders or families cared for isolated neighbors. In many situations now, we may not even know our neighbors and our relatives could be living in an entirely different state.
It is fun to be in a grocery store or library and randomly compliment a stranger. Maybe the color they are wearing brightens them up or perhaps they remind you of someone else. Any simple recognition lifts kindness into the face of the lonely. Sincerely thanking a clerk in the check out lane or a server cleaning off your table at a restaurant can acknowledge a job well done no matter what level of skill.
We all long to be accepted. For some it may be politics, family, relationship or career, but sadly, many long to be accepted just as a human being. We all want to feel connected or to feel like we belong whether it is to family, club, specialty group or the human race.
The first step in fulfilling needs is simply recognizing that we have them and then acknowledging that needs deserve to be met. We are worthy in spite of poor choices or our age. We are never too young nor too old to meet our needs.
We need to be mindful of our words as they so often go directly to the heart ... ours included. We need to be appropriately generous with our affection as it kindles our souls. In freely extending attention, affection, appreciation and acceptance towards others, our needs will be met in kind.
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