turning point

turning point

“ lighting a candle in her own darkness,
she came and brought it to the others.
'i understand,' she whispered, 'and i want to help.'
there was safety in what she offered.
there was hope in the flickering shadows.
quietly, they gathered.
and it began.
crying, trusting, struggling, sharing.
empowering and celebrating,
they grew and became more.
taking their own candles back to their own worlds
they changed the darkness back to light. ”

~terri st. cloud
 www.bonesigharts.com

Throwing Clay ...

"What you do is nothing

compared to who you are."

DISTANT SHORES

Kristin Hannah



Have you ever thrown clay on a potters wheel?  Did you ever allow clay to ooze through your fingers?  Were you ever able to give form to shapeless clay?  How do you feel when you give your hands to artistic expression?

Of course, I am comparing all of the above to experiencing life itself.  Life can be illusive and non-conforming, while sliding through our fingers.  To use our creative instincts can either leave us feeling depleted or soaring full of confidence.

Whatever it is that we make of our self is important to a certain extent, but like many structures there needs to be a solid foundation.  We must have a sense of who we are, what we stand for, and how we view the world around us.  If there is integrity and caring at our core, it will be reflected on the outside in how we perform tasks at hand.  When we recognize and use our creative tendencies, unique results can set us a part from unoriginal work.  To be productive in the flow of what is truly our own strength or gift or talent, we become empowered.

A potter does not throw clay on the wheel and just expect form to take place.  The hands of the potter are trained through experience and knows to guide the clay with imagination allowing design to come forth.  There needs to be a rhythm between the pace of the wheel and the formation in between the hands to create a successful product.

We, too, cannot just sit back waiting for life to take form.  We must position our self for experience, to learn and respect the rhythm of life, and be led to a creative successful product.  We must be 'hands on' to bring life into life! 

Be the artist of your very own life.  Create with a flourish either with imagination or participation.  Whatever you feel is missing in your life, seek and you will find.  Become the artist standing at the potters wheel.

On Track

Continuing On

"almost crumbling to the ground she stopped.
looking at how far she had traveled
and all it had taken to get there,
she recognized her strength. 

the strengths she had inside of her,
the strength she had gained along the way -
her inner power.

and so, she stood up ,
standing tall,
she faced forward
and continued on.

by terri st.cloud



The business concept of 'climbing up a ladder' never made much sense to me, as it seemed that once someone reached the top, in time, they would simply fall off or worse yet, be pushed. 

Some where along the line, I embraced the concept of all of us being on a train.  All of us were headed to the same destination traveling along in different cars.  There was no 'better than' as we all shifted from one train car to another.  At times we might ride up front by the engine, driving full speed a head, but then we would take a turn at sitting in the caboose enjoying the beautiful scenery.  Hiding out in a cabin for silence was perfectly accepted. 

Taking this train concept even further, we could say that at times we de-boarded, visiting little towns along the stations.  As all human beings have free will, we could go exploring, but ultimately, we would be gently nudged back to the depot. 

Riding along in the train car, we would each have a window.  We could each take in the same sight, but interpret what we saw in our own language or perceptions.  Nothing right or wrong, just different.

I do not want to focus on the train running off the track, (which does happen), or someone getting thrown off the train (which does happen) as that is just part of the journey. 

I do want to focus on the train holding us all together as we experience life not alone but connected.  Even if we want to be alone, we can still look with compassion into the eyes of those fellow travelers who suffer.  We can observe the joy expressed on the faces of young and old alike.  Really see the beauty in the landscapes as they pass through our vision and hear the click-clacking of the train speeding over the tracks. 

While sitting in the lounge car, feel the texture of the linens and the fragrance of the flower in the vase.  Watch the water as is sloshes in the glass. Be mindful of the variety of flavors spreading across your taste buds. 

In darkness, we pass through a tunnel.  Keep looking ahead as in time, we will see the small ball of light grow larger.  Eventually, we will be covered in light once again.

If we can embrace life with a simple awareness, the ride will be so much smoother.  If we don't like the company we keep, change cars.  If we want to accelerate, move to the engine room.  If we need to connect with nature, go sit in the caboose.  If we need time out, search for an unoccupied cabin.  The Ticket Master will be available to offer guidance.  When we have really serious questions, however, the Conductor is always ready to listen and assist as there is a map to show us the way.

All aboard!

A Metaphor of Life

After  a mentor recited this particular metaphor to me, I was very careful to step over 'manholes' in the city sidewalk for fear of falling in.  I understand this writing all too well and  I continue to be mindful to cross the street!

  

THERE'S A HOLE IN            MY SIDEWALK           by Portia Nelson
I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost .... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.
I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend that I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I am in this same place. But, it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. I walk down another street.	.

Inspiration or Hot Air?

We do not need more material development;
we need more spiritual development.
We do not need more intellectual power;
we need more moral power.
We do not need more knowledge;
we need more character.
We do not need more government;
we need more culture.

We do not need more of the things that are seen;
we need more of the things that are unseen.

– Calvin Coolidge


It is a beautiful fall morning so I have settled in on the glider on the back patio.  The sun is not yet high so there are many shades and shadows to the trees.  A gentle breeze rattles the pages of my journal as I watch clouds disappearing in the sky. 

My thoughts float in and out of my conciousness, taunting my awareness to expand and connect.  I give great thought to wisdom I have come to explore, reject, and embrace.  Random quotes pop up in my mind and stay suspended long enough for me to clearly see their color and design.   I find myself wondering if they are meant for inspiration or if they are like hot air balloons ... filled with hot air.



Growing the Garden

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid, one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory.

Douglas MacArthur

My youngest son is named Matthew which means 'gift of God', a definition he has lived up to.    He loves to grow things in his garden, make things with his hands, tinker, and build things out of wood.  He is genuinely interested in helping others and encourages elders to share their stories.  Family is his top priority and fathers both his son and daughter with the expectation of them growing fully into his or her true nature.

My eyes are not closed to his weaknesses, as I was there.  I lived with this son of mine and watched him face life's struggles.  It is most difficult for an individual who shelters a huge and gentle heart like he does when not everyone understands, including me.  I dearly love this shy and gentle child of mine and I deeply respect the man he has made of himself.  To say that I am proud of him would be an understatement.

As a toddler, he would wander out to our garden in his pajamas and come back in eating a dirty carrot he had rooted all by himself.  He loved to go fishing with his uncle at a very young age, as long as his sister didn't tag along, as according to him, she 'talked too much'.  He could be found making an earthy bowl out of the trunk of a fallen tree.

Spring, summer, and fall were seasons that Matthew would rather be outside than sitting in school.  He loved the earth and could spend endless hours exploring it.  Even in the winter he had a need to be outside. I would beg him to come in from the dark, to leave his snow fort as it was time for his bath and bed.  He loved being beneath the stars.

By college his love for the earth had grown into a passion.  He could track, eat berries, locate caves, and camp at any little park across the state where he could fish.  No matter where he was at sunset, he would face the sun and watch its gentle descent into the far horizon.

This gentle soul was filled with emotion for all things and his tender heart was rarely understood by those around him.  We would have in depth conversations about the many layers of life and what might be waiting beyond.  He would pick up and read most anything I would be reading, but he especially liked Ted Brown's series and Dan Millman's WAY OF THE PEACEFUL WARRIOR.

Matthew entered the professional world, made good money, acquired polish and style, and mastered responsibility which left no time for gardens, woodworking, or watching sunsets.  Eventually, his need to be connected to nature and to begin a family of his own lulled him back into a slower paced life style.

Still in a professional position, he lives in a smaller community where he can plant  both vegetable and flower gardens with his 'green thumbs', raise 70 tomato plants for habitat for humanity, research thousands of seeds and plants, learn how to make tinctures, and converse with local bee keepers. With his gifted hands and skill he has made for me a wine cabinet, rocking chair, and beautiful coffee table.  For his children, he made a high chair and a crib.  At holidays, there is always some keepsake from Matthew that was imagined in his mind and gifted straight from his heart.

On occasion, a friend will send me a cut out newspaper picture of my son being recognized.  He is way too humble to ever tell me of his accomplishments.  One thing remains certain, however.  I can still tell if he is being untruthful just by looking at him in the eyes!

A Place For You ...

How might your life have been different if there had

been a place for you, a place for you to go to be with your mother, with your sisters and the aunts, with your grandmothers, and the great- and great-great-grandmothers, a place of women to go, to be, to return to, as woman?

How might your life be different?

CIRCLE OF STONES

Judith Duerk

Our society is very mobile with loved ones located all over the world.  Young children may not have life time relationships with their grandparents or extended family.  The sense of community once found in incidental small towns is on a reduced scale.  The family structure itself has been and is being altered in it self. 

CIRCLE OF STONES, Woman's Journey To Herself,  by Judith Duerk, is a wonderful book for all ages.  It prompts the reader to look within to discover a personal feminine voice while viewing ancient culture and ritual.  The ability to create wholeness, which was once guided by the gathering of female family members, is now the responsibility of each of us.  Without the storytelling of ancient wisdom, the process towards developing our feminine nature can be lengthy and daunting.

It is for this reason that relationships need to be as real and truthful as they possibly can.  We must be the mothers, sisters and aunts, grandmothers, and great grandmothers and great-great-grandmothers to one and other.  We are called to fill relationships with integrity and openness, with our truth for the enhancement of all involved.

"Friends are the family

we meet along the way."

'Stay Close' ...

Dreams are like letters from God.

Isn't it time you answered your mail?

Marie Louise von Franz

Falling asleep came easily for me last night, but in the middle of the night, I abruptly woke up.  As I generally keep track of my dreams, I settled back down into my pillow and allowed my self to recall what I had been dreaming.  

Out of all my friends, my college roommate has known me the longest.  She is near and dear to my heart, especially now as her body tries to accept a bone marrow transplant.  She has been on a healing journey for numerous months and successfully rid her body of leukemia.  She is a very strong and determined woman who maintains an attitude of hope, faith, and good cheer. 

When we communicated yesterday, I told her that I would 'stay close' to her as I possibly could, meaning through prayer, energy, love, and light.  A spirit must have overheard me and took me at my word, as I found my self present with my dearest friend in the middle of the night in the space called dream time.

Dreams have been a fascinating topic for me.  I have researched dream time for years and have made numerous presentations on this very subject.  I work well with my dreams as well as the dreams of others.  There is an abundance of information and experience that can be learned from these inner visions, but one must stay balanced by understanding symbols, who the people in the dream represent, and what the message beneath the surface is trying to explain to the unseeing eye.  Even with all of this, dreams are not easy to understand.

I settled back into a restful position and did some deep breathing.  I closed my eyes and tried to re-enter my dream, keeping my senses alert so that I would comprehend all aspects of the message.

The atmosphere was like gauze with heavy swirling colors.  I could not literally see this dear sister of my heart, but I knew she was there.  I recognized her just as easily as if I had been in her presence and simply closed my eyes.  I felt disturbed by the varying dark gray colors that kept swirling in this gauze-like area that seemed to indicate that she was quite uncomfortable.  I could feel my calm begin to slip away as everything seemed to be out of balance. 

Suddenly I understood.  Earlier, I told her from my heart that I would 'stay close' and apparently this is what I was meant to do in this space called dream time.  I silently called out to her and told her that I was with her.  I covered all of the floating gauze with gentle healing colors.  I spread light throughout the entire scene and found a little cubby hole to drain all of the darkness from her body, heart, and soul.  I found myself humming to her and sending her energy, love, and light that would support her wherever she chooses to go. 

It was at this point that I woke up, feeling as though I had just had an extremely peaceful and calming visit with my long time friend.  I realized that I had been given this 'picture' of how I can best help her.  It is a vision to be played over and over again during my meditations or simple thoughts of her during the day.   I will memorize this scene committing it to memory so that I can 'stay  close' to her as I possibly can ... wherever she may journey.

Threads of Silk in the Web of Life

Excerpt from The Work of the Worm,
AS FAR AS THE HEART CAN SEE
by Mark Nepo:

"The story tells us everything in Creation is connected, and that what holds it all together comes from the humble work of living on earth, spinning from our guts a fine thread that holds everything together.  It tells us that the experience of eternity is possible, if we immerse ourselves firsthand in the barely see-able web of connectedness." 
                 (The Work of the Worm, a story)



Towards the end of last year, the near death of a close friend prompted me to evaluate my life.  Too often we forget how fragile life really is and no matter what our age, death may visit unexpectedly.  I began to review neglected personal commitments towards expressing myself whether through the written or spoken word, and rearranged my priorities.  After all, I had clearly arrived at what I had always referred to as my future!  If not now, when?

At the beginning of this year, I made a presentation, The Art of Dreaming, to an audience of 40 eager faces.  It was an exciting topic as dreams are portals to deeper understanding of our inner self.  Throughout this event, I was repeatedly reminded of how very much I enjoyed the sense of spirit flowing through me, how my researched and experienced knowledge could really enhance the lives of others, and the pure joy of living in the present moment.

Late in the winter, I was blessed to spend a month on Maui.  There was no way to ignore nature while visiting on this island.  Every glance taken fell upon beauty just waiting to be embraced.  Winding roads led to intriguing little towns, and the constant waves of the ocean drew attention to the whales and turtles.  Flowers and trees reflected a vibrancy that seemed to be drawn from the spirit of the culture.  I seemed to be suspended in a spiritual experience of intensified awareness finding magic in all people, places, and things.  Never have I felt so exhilarated.

So I studied these three experiences (evaluating my life, being present through presentation, and intense observation) and asked myself how they were related to each other.  Mark Nepo asks, "What are they trying to say to you about the nature of life and where you are in your journey?" 

The nature of my life seems to thrive when I exchange wisdom and remain still with awareness.  I find magic in my life when I connect all things together.  My journey encourages me to explore all of the mysteries lodged within my soul. 
I can see how all three incidents are related, connected, and intertwined.  All experiences become the silky thread of the cocoon binding our encounters and adventures.  Great or small, our very existence is significant to the connectedness of all of life.  If we listen, we will hear the wisdom each has to share.

In the words of Mark Nepo, "The story tells us that if we still ourselves long enough within the web of all there is, we will eventually come to know the lightness of God's being."

The Best Remedy

The best remedy for those who are

afraid, lonely, or unhappy

is to go outside,

somewhere they can be quite alone

with the heavens, nature, and God.

Because only then does one feel

that all is as it should be and

that God wishes to see people

happy amidst the simple

beauty of nature.

Anne Frank

1929 ~ 1945

A storm passed through last night, bringing thunder, lightning, and plentiful rain.  It also brought Trudy our Tuxedo cat and Hannah our Golden Retriever into my bedroom.  I felt like Noah in the Ark!  It is cloudy today, but the temperatures have dropped considerably.   Much to my liking, it is now sweatshirt or sweater weather.

Seasons change just like our lives, and it is vitally important that we make healthy choices along the way.  Transitioning is a given no matter what our age or circumstances and the more gracefully we flow with the ebbs and tides, the better off we will be. 

When we find lack in our life, we can feel better by reaching out to others.  By giving instead of receiving, our sense of purpose, self-esteem, and attitude begin to soar.  Schools, nursing homes, and hospitals easily embrace volunteers who can sing, or read, or bring in a trained pet, or just to visit.  A local library may be needing help or perhaps a new mother could use a little encouragement.   Bring your neighbor some muffins or cookies or offer a ride to a community event.  The opportunities are endless, and when we feel compassion, we begin to feel connected again. 

To receive everything,

one must open

one's hands and give.

Taisen Deshimaru

Fall is a perfect time to meet friends at a park or take a neighbor on a walk.  Everything in nature will reach out to us and the presence of God in all things will fill us with hope, love and praise.

Girls In My Circle

***This last Christmas at my women's circle, Mary, a dear 'sister of my heart', shared this poem.  I have no idea who the author is or what resource from which it was taken.


GIRLS IN MY CIRCLE

When I was little,
I used to believe in the concept of one best friend,
And then I started to become a woman.
And then I found out that if you allow your heart to open up,
God would show you the best in many friends.

One friend is needed when you're going through things with your man.
Another friend is needed when you're going through things with your mom.
Another will sit beside you in the bleachers as you delight in your children and their activities.
Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be.
One friend will say, 'Let's cry together,'
Another, 'Let's fight together,'
Another, 'Let's walk away together.'

One friend will meet your spiritual need,
Another your shoe fetish,
Another your love for movies,
Another will be with you in your season of confusion,
Another will be your clarifier,
Another the wind beneath your wings.

But whatever their assignment in your life,
On whatever the occasion,
On whatever the day,
Or wherever you need them to meet you with their gym shoes on and hair pulled back,
Or to hold you back from making a complete fool of yourself ...
Those are your best friends.

It may all be wrapped up in one woman, but for many it's wrapped up in several.
One from 7th grade,
One from high school,
Several from the college years,
A couple from old jobs,
On some days your mother,
On some days your neighbor,
On others, your sisters,
And on some days, your daughters.

Asking for Prayers, Energy, and Light

Joyce Marie

College Roommate

Sister of my heart



Friends, energy workers, and all whom I have never met ~

 

On March 10th, 2011, I sent out a desperate request on behalf of my college roommate, Joyce Marie.  She was receiving large doses of chemo to kill leukemia (which was a side effect from medicine she takes for a life threatening blood disease) in preparation for a bone marrow transplant.

 

With deep gratitude I am elated to report that all of you must have responded beyond expectations as her beautiful spirit has survived the first stage of her long journey.  Now after numerous months, she will be able to enter the second stage for the bone marrow transplant. 

 

PLEASE pray, send energy, love, and light, or do whatever it is you do so that Joyce Marie's body will not reject the bone marrow transplant.  PLEASE send support so that she may have the courage and strength to walk this path of healing or to the greater beyond.

 

I am deeply grateful for any kindness you may offer to this dear sister of my heart!

 

                                       I sincerely thank you!

                                                   Virginia

 

 

beyond depression ...

It is my intention to reflect insights and share the challenges in life through writing.  What I write is fairly eclectic and I try to express parts of life that resonate with others.  Below is a poem that was written as an example of journaling.  It was discovered while I was presenting a seminar on JOURNALING, The Path To Self Discovery.  The source of the poem is unknown to me.

Depression is a normal part of our cycle.  We are very confident and secure, then slip into feeling some what secure, down to feeling negative and lack luster, and finally into a depressive state.  This is a cycle that we can visit within an hour, a day, a month or a year.  We generally become aware of this emotional rotation early on when we begin our menstruation cycle.  This same cycle, if we pay attention, can rotate emotionally throughout our lives.  Clearly, this experience with depression is not the same as clinical depression.  Nevertheless, all of us at some time or another feels the darkness of the descent into depression. 

Journaling is an excellent way to release pent up fears and anxiety, a way to express the loss of personal power and the feelings of invisibility.  Once written, a poem can be thrown away, burned, or kept as a reminder that you can and will survive.

depression

hovers and hangs

over me like a living thing.

it swallows me

it starts at my

edges and takes

small bites -

then keeps eating

away in my

head - til i

am no more.

i am consumed

by this thing.

i want to fight back

but

i let it take me -

it's so easy to be

eaten alive -

bit by bit

by words

by anger

by resentment

till there is

nothing

author unknown

WRITING FROM LIFE by author Susan Wittig Albert suggests how to Tell Your Soul's Story.  Within this  wonderful book there is a writing by a woman who came to the end of one part of her journey, but eventually found the beginning of another.

"Today, a year later, I feel that I am on another journey, one that has shown me glimpses of adventures ahead.  I am finding new friends to travel with and am learning to trust myself to do what needs doing.  I venture daily into unknown territory both physically and spiritually.  No one walks so closely with death without being forever changed, but I find I am moving forward more easily every day.  Like Robert Frost, I have miles to go before I sleep.  ---Marjorie C.

A journal can be your best companion while walking through your darkest hour and later for sharing your climb into a promising light.  The importance is found in the release of deep feelings rather than retaining them within where physcial illness can grow. 

To Be A Woman

"I am finding that it takes a lot of time

to be a woman,

to have a feeling of space and breath,

a chance to sink into myself ...

as long as I take time every morning

to light a candle to my life,

it remains my life.

But if I hurry into work

without that small moment of quiet,

then I've already lost myself,

and the day.

The task, for me, is to care, daily,

for myself and my life ...

to love and to nurture,

within myself,

moment by moment,

the quality of quiet presence,

quietly being present to my life,

which sanctifies it ...

to live as if the candle is lighted."

Author Unknown

****I came across this quote while digging through my files.  I have no idea where it came from, but it must have resonated within me years ago when I first recorded it, and I loved it when I came upon it again today. 

Unfolding Like A Lotus

Say not, "I have found the truth,"
but rather, "I have found a truth."

Say not, "I have found the path of the soul."
Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path."

For the soul walks upon all paths.

The soul walks not upon a line,
neither does it grow like a reed.

The soul unfolds itself,
like a lotus of countless petals.

THE PROPHET by Kahlil Gibran


As we move through our day, let us try to have an expanded sense of self and a higher awareness of all life.  Let us face any threat as a challenge rather than a negative force, believing that we have the skills to navigate successfully through life with an open heart.  And by all means, develop a sense of humor!

We carry a responsibility for our inner self to always try to do our best overcoming temptations.  Frequently, what appears to be the easier way will ultimately lead to more difficulty. 

Embrace your spirit in spite of weakness, being the best you can be, as integrity (being who you are when no one is looking) is a great achievement.  The more you respect your self,  the higher your self esteem will grow.

Be creative in any aspect of your life that you can.  Nurture your soul and gently tend to your physical needs.  Light a candle in celebration of your very soul unfolding like a lotus.

Holes in the side of the barn ...

Ultimately the bond of all companionship,

whether in marriage or in friendship,

is conversation.

Oscar Wilde



Women tend to master companionship to a greater degree than men.  Perhaps it is the physical expressions that accompany female conversations like a pat on the hand or a hug.  Then there are the little gifts, maybe unexpected flowers or a nice bottle of wine or a surprise card received in the mail.  So easily one's spirit can be lifted by a simple gesture of a dear friend.

The skills of communication are imperative such as:  acceptance without judgment, compassion without refrain, and listening without resolution.  Most people when in need of a friend are not necessarily looking for resolve, but rather just needing to hear themselves think out loud or just be heard.  Any friend must know how to just sit and be present for the other ... no special mantra or chant is required.

There is a need to let the bad with the good come tumbling out, knowing that the dear friend will never throw it back into your face.   Author John Gray states, "When negative feelings are suppressed, positive feelings become suppressed as well, and love dies."  Relationships frequently end through lack of healthy communication while participants scratch their heads wondering what happened. "What did I say?"  Sometimes it is what you didn't say.

When I was in high school, my beloved home room teacher, Vernoy Johnson gave me an illustration that I remember to this day.  He told me that words were like arrows being shot into the side of a barn.  He said that you can pull the arrows out once they had been shot, but the holes in the side of the barn would remain forever. 

So often we are careless with our words.  We say things out of anger that we really don't mean or refrain from saying meaningful feelings that might alter the destination of a friendship.  If in friendship we do not confront each other, imaginary walls are built, and healing may never occur.  I wonder how many friendships fall by the way side over simple misunderstandings.

While reviewing our lives, I am certain that other than family memories, our tender moments are laced with happy recalls of friendship.  We probably can think of funny situations, embarrassing moments, or heart to heart talks shared with best buddies.  A dear friend is priceless.  Unconditional love, gentle gestures, and simple acts of kindness allow us to enter the healing light of friendship.  An established arena of safety is where our friends stand, calling to us, "Well, come on!  Well come on!"

and finally ...

" ... and finally she came to the place

whether the other no longer mattered.

where Grace lit up the room.

lighting her candle

from that sacred flame ---

she went out to warm the world."

terri st. cloud

bonesigharts.blogspot.com

The Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church celebrated its 24th Greek Festival and the attendance was high.  The weather was beautiful and the gala music floated through the air.   There were food tents and tables filled with candles, jewelry, and religious mementos.

Tours of the church were offered, so I wandered inside.  The wooden pews, the decorative paintings, and the design all reflected a religion that I did not know, but I felt invited and embraced.  Towards the back of the church, there was an area with skinny beeswax candles stuck in sand burning brightly.  For a small donation, an unlit candle could be chosen, then touched to an existing burning candle.

Clearing my mind, I was careful in selecting my candle from the pile.  As I walked over to the burning candles, I waited for a prayer to form.  Almost instantly from my heart, the words came tumbling out.  ... 'Thank you!  Thank you so much for my four children and grandchildren who have taught me how to love and remain resilient."  I moved the wick of my candle into a flame and as it ignited, I felt a tender warmth in my heart. 

As I walked out of the church, the festival activities once again surrounded me and lifted my spirits even higher.  I felt joyful and almost buoyant.   It was good to watch the children dancing in costume and to hear adults heartily singing words I did not understand.  To be in the midst of this celebration my warmth naturally flowed into a collective feeling of being one.

ESSESNTIAL CONVERSATIONS ... ATTENTION

In the middle of every difficulty

lies an opportunity.

Albert Einstein

During my transition into a new life, I have found creating a network of friends to be the most difficult.  So the other day I followed up on an opportunity my daughter found on line.  I attended an informal discussion entitled ESSENTIAL CONVERSATIONS at The Wisdom House.  The goal was to explore the many definitions of the word attention and how the meanings were used in our daily spiritual lives.

Sitting in a circle with strangers, it became obvious that although a variety of spiritual beliefs and practices were represented, and differing words and phrases were used, there was a sense of 'being on the same page'.  We were all different, but in some aspects, the same.

The word attention was understood by some in a mental way, while others thought of it in a physical way, and then there were those who sensed it in a spiritual way.  Grouping everything together, we found the word to be fully defined.

For your enjoyment, here are some of the responses.

Attention is:

• an experience within
• a mental focus
• a way of being
• eye contact, connecting
• oneness, bonding
• mindfulness
• ability to be present in a spiritual and secular way
• results in thanksgiving and joy
• attendance and tending to children
• garden tending
• energy in nature
• meditation
• being fully present
• not all pretty moments
• in pain, remove ego to attain awareness
• making a difference
• witness

My favorite comment was:  If we strike a singing bowl, each of us will hear a different sound.  This is so true about most everything we experience. 

A suggestion was made to do a self-inquiry.  Notice your thought, trace it back to the original thought and then ask, "Who or what is thinking that?" 

This exercise helps us to realize that much of what we think is not original thought.  We can trace much of what we say or think back to ego or to what some one else said or did.  By doing this, we become aware that our authentic self is quietly behind conversation or thoughts, almost like a back drop ... being silent, but paying attention!

AS FAR AS THE HEART CAN SEE

AS FAR AS THE HEART CAN SEE

Stories To Illuminate The Soul

by

Mark Nepo

If you read my blog with any regularity, you already know that Mark Nepo is one of my most favorite non-fiction authors.  Every morning I read from THE BOOK OF AWAKENING.  In his own words, this book is described in this way: "This book is meant to be of use, to be a companion, a soul friend."  It is that and more.

Mark Nepo's new book has just been published, AS FAR AS THE HEART CAN SEE, Stories To Illuminate the Soul.

The author states:

"Stories help us.

They are teachers.

They are medicine.

They keep us connected to what matters.

They keep us awake."

The intention of this latest Mark Nepo book is described as:  "This book then is an invitation to be in relationship with deep and life-giving material.  The stories gathered here carry seeds of our humaneness.  They delve into the courage to listen to your own life, the gift of vulnerability, the willingness to experiment and explore your own voice, the abiding commitment to respect your own journey and the journeys of others, and the life skill of working with what we are given."

AS FAR AS THE HEART CAN SEE is filled with stories that can be read in any order.  Each story is then followed by individual segments entitled: Journal Questions, Table Questions, and Meditation.  These segments deepen the understanding of the story, encourages the application to your own life, and motivates the reader to share the story while gathered with friends.  It is a delight!

Mark Nepo is also the author of:  FINDING INNER COURAGE, UNLEARNING BACK TO GOD, THE EXQUISITE RISK,  and THE BOOK OF AWAKENING.  He has also written several poetry books and has several recordings.

Unsettling fog ...

To be near something beautiful or precious

but to be unable to experience it

is the subtlest possible form

of torture.

Robert Johnson

There is comfort in choosing a particular spiritual path as it offers a sense of direction and a reasonable idea of what is to be expected.  There are side roads, however, that distract us from the original trail.  These diversions can enhance our experience through beauty and mystery or cause us anxiety through an unsettling fog.

There is a place in my heart where wisdom grows and my soul expands.  In this space, I know that we are all connected one to the other, and surrounded by love and light.  It is this 'knowing' that guides me down my path experiencing the magic in the world.  This same knowledge is within me when I find myself unsettled in fog, but ego speaks so loudly in fear, my confidence wains.  It is easier to be brave in the sunshine seeing the road splayed before you than it is groping along in the fog.

"Where am I now," my voice calls out to no one.  I cannot see through this heavy mist that reduces my mental and spiritual clarity.  I thought I knew where I was headed, until I lost my vision.  Ah, therein the answer is found!

All the beauty and things that I hold dear continue to surround me as the fog is only in my clouded perception.  My ego steeped in fear deceives me, not my chosen path at all!  So easily I forget, but surely each challenge helps me to grow.