Listen to the Heart ...

What is so important that we have time to

read all the books on love and relationships,

but we do not have time to listen

to the heart of our lover?

--Molly Vass

There is plenty of time to listen to the heart of a lover, but sometimes, there is nothing to be heard.  We can sit very quietly listening for truth or engage in deep conversation for understanding and still be left in a quandary.

So in place of truth, we create illusions causing the relationship to appear as we want it to be rather than how it really is.  We ignore the body language and the disrespectful behavior, and continue to lavish affection upon our lover.  We allow our self to be led farther and farther away from the reality in which we live.

It takes great effort to keep up the pretense that love is swell, so we keep giving and giving until we run dry.  There comes that critical point when we realize there is nothing left to give and our love has not been replenished.

We hold our self responsible and face the lesson at hand.  It is not selfish to want more ... to be appreciated, respected, and loved, but we cannot teach the lover how to love.  We each love in our own way. 

"Grow where you are planted," says artist Mary Englebright.  But in order to have stable and healthy roots, the soil must be rich for growth.  There must be sunshine and rain, shelter and nutrients or the roots will shrivel or rot or die. 

Yes, we must listen to the heart of our lover, but first we must listen to our own heart to be clear of what we desire.  We must keep our vision clear to see how things really are and not how we want them to be. 

We must focus on our own growth and deminish our shadows.  In time, our lover will be drawn to our radiant light.  Our lover will want to be present in our life while listening to our heart.